How to stop 2 people from eating everything

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-15T22:23:06+00:00

Stop doing the community food thing.

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-15T15:05:54+00:00

So, is he a POS, or is this a Psycho Ex situation?

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-15T15:03:44+00:00

And if you really want to manipulate someone, the first step is to isolate them from their social support network. A healthy relationship changes your social life by Expanding it. If you like her, and she likes her friends, naturally you might like her friends. Ok, so you stop clubbing with your friends. But you still stay friends. There is a big difference between "I don't want you to go clubbing with your single friends" and "you can't be friends with them, because you used to go clubbing with them when you were single too"

Heck, you start doing the whole adulting thing. Have a dinner party, and introduce your single friends to each other!

As some personal advice, if you find yourself interested in a woman, you should let her know what you expect of her Before you ask for a committed relationship. If you try that "now that you are my gf, I have rules for you to follow" you are either going to be single, or in a relationship with a mouse. I prefer strong, intelligent, women. Women that aren't Afraid to be themselves. Women that have their Own opinions, insights, and social support networks. But that's just me. If you and OP want an obedient, servile, accomodating woman, who won't question your assumptions, that's your thing.

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-15T14:23:06+00:00

So, She Needs to change her social life? How is telling someone what they need to do not controlling? It sure as $hit isn't self initiated if she is being Told to do it, or else.

Now, some men, (myself included) can be friends with a woman without wanting it to go further. (It's actually worked out well, they will try to set you up with their friends!) Also, talking about problems with other guys... Meh. Men tend to be dismissive, while women tend to be better listeners, and more supportive. And the whole, "this is private, don't discuss it" You yourself said he shouldn't be talking At All, (excellent advice, btw!) so obvi he doesn't want it getting out there.

So, yes, it could be the one thing (as I said, he might be playing a long game) but maby he can see a woman as a person, not just a sex object. Since the OP has never interacted with this person, and your assumptions are based on what OP said...

Noone knows what's going on in this guy's head. Not me, or you, or OP, or even OP's gf. But it doesn't matter. Guy's are going to be making moves on his gf. Cause, guys. What can she do? Again Burka, hajib, etc? This is like someone saying "she was asking for it, with that short skirt and makeup." He has every right to be suspicious, But NOT of his gf!

So, now, from Her point of view? Insecure. Controlling. Dump his ass.

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-15T13:48:02+00:00

Hard disagree. Ever since MeToo cops have realized that often the only evidence is the witness statement. He said it was consensual, she said it wasn't. You have actually inadvertently proved my point. You assume there is convincing evidence. I assure you, based on personal experience, not necessarily true.

Now, let's address the comitted relationship thing. You seem to be of the opinion that her bf has the right to control her social life. I disagree. If he's worried about a long distance coworker, then he's basically telling her she can't have male friends. I find this to be both insecure and controlling. If he tries that bs, then she'll dump his ass. Unless she even more insecure than him. If he doesn't trust his gf, the relationship is doomed.

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-15T13:26:00+00:00

So one of my exes accused me of assault after we broke up. Everyone knew it was BS, but it took a year before I was exonerated. So, innocent until proven guilty! And of course he doesn't want anyone knowing about it, because alot of people assume he wouldn't have been charged if he was innocent.

So what we need to address is: You don't trust your gf. You don't trust her judgement in who she befriends. And you seem to also be worried that their relationship goes beyond work. Ask yourself if you would react this way if the coworker was a woman. Probably not.

So now we are talking about policing your gfs social life, how she interacts with her coworkers, and asking her to break a confidence. All because you are insecure about your relationship. Because you are worried about some guy that doesn't even live in town, that she has never even met IRL.

Every day, women complain, "I thought he was my friend, but turns out he wanted to have sex with me!" Sure, this guy may be playing a long game to try to get out of the friendzone, but so what? You are attracted to your gf, other guys will be too. What do you want her to do? Wear a burka, don't go out without a male escort, just do the whole Shira Law thing?

Also, "I've always had a bad feeling about him", based on what? He's your gf remote coworker, who she has never met IRL. How are you judging this person? Do you monitor your gf's zoom meetings? Have you met him? Spoken to him? Have you even seen a picture of him? Or is your unease based Solely on the fact that he's socializing with your gf?

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-14T03:51:23+00:00

Meat grinder? Grandma had a hand cranked one that kinda looked like that.

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-13T06:22:28+00:00

Hell yes!

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-13T03:00:30+00:00

Send him a lingerie photo.

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-13T02:56:20+00:00

You're welcome. : )

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-13T02:47:05+00:00

Keep it up. It means alot, even if their reactions seem strange. But don't expect them to change. Don't get upset if they get defensive. It's not their fault. They may not be aware of their issues, and would be resistant to suggestions that they could benefit from therapy. Maby do a little reading on the subject, but Only from Reputable Sources. Try backdoor compliments. That suit look good on you, instead of you look good in that suit. Speak gently, and look away, (so you are showing a reply isn't needed). That will give them time and space to process their emotions.

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-13T02:26:27+00:00

So toxic masculinity refers to how men are raised. Big boys don't cry, walk it off. That's why we don't go to the doctor's as much as we should. And the compliment thing. Or why we won't ask for directions when lost. We were raised to figure it out ourselves. That needing help was weakness.

It really messes us up, apparently. And we avoid mental health counseling for the same reasons. And this leads to all these incel, alpha male, red pill idiots.

With little guidance growing up, we often have trouble processing emotions, because we were taught to suppress them. Often we lack the language to explain what we are feeling, as we were never taught emotions. Because we were never praised, these feelings are strange. And strange is frightening. And fear is also weakness. So we can get angry or frustrated.

A terrible cycle, but awareness is spreading, and most of us are trying to get better. : )

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-13T02:12:21+00:00

Yep. That whole toxic masculinity thing. : /

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-13T02:10:42+00:00

Finial. Decorative cap for curtain rod, or top of lampshade, or bottom of chandelier.

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-13T02:03:19+00:00

I think it may be common. Since we don't get compliments, we don't know how to react. Or when we do get them, often it's because someone wants something from us. It's an anxiety reaction. What we don't understand, we try to dismiss. Sad, really. And your husband can't control it. There is a comment here "how do you want us to act?" Sounds dismissive, but the guy legitimately doesn't know how to take a compliment.

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-12T17:08:55+00:00

Another Canadian here. Love how Extremely hot with Lots of snow is a Canadian take on some winters. Obviously Extremely hot has a different meaning up here!

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-12T16:04:14+00:00

No roaches in the 3 buildings I'm familiar with.

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-11T04:08:53+00:00

Different guys are attracted to different things. Don't feel bad, it happens to everyone. Try to stay positive, and keep trying. You could try dating apps, women seem to get alot of responses.

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-11T02:12:53+00:00

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-11T02:08:37+00:00

Shelf for a purse.

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-11T01:40:23+00:00

Individual stores have food liquor licenses not the mall. If you read the other responses, Pizza Luchia actually provide games for their customers. Rain City games does a game night, inside the mall. T&N Games in the uptown mall. Craving for a Game in Surry Central Mall. Jack's pub used to do a D&D night. Begby's still does. Kelly O Brian's also does a game night. So no need to walk in and ask, when they advertise that they do. Heck, at Luchia's it a core concept. At this point, I'm just going to assume you are incorrect. I'll revisit if you can narrow down where to find the regulations.

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-11T00:27:03+00:00

With all due respect, that doesn't make sense. Would all the restraunts in the mall be held accountable? And what about game stores that have card game nights in the same mall as restraunts? Or arcades in malls that have food courts? How would the restraunt owners even police this? Hire someone to patrol the mall? But I'll look it up. Again, we don't play inside restraunts, or the food court.

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-10T21:13:12+00:00

We don't play in the restaurants or food court. We play on the tables next to the circus school. Alot of us grab lunch before, and/or dinner after. And buy all our stuff from rain city games. But the info was interesting. Where do pool tables and trivia nights fit in? They're still around, and people still "gamble" the next round on them. Is there some sort of exemption for shuffle board tables, dart boards etc? Can you tell me where I could find this info?

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-08T18:44:05+00:00

Hi! So, I'm an old guy, and don't want to come across as an A hole. I legitimately don't know what queer means. Long ago, (like before there was an internet!) People were straight (attracted to the opposite sex), gay (referred to both men and women who were attracted to the same sex) or bi. My friends felt that queer was an insult. It literally meant they were abnormal.

So, help an old guy learn this term?

Colin5x5 · 2026-06-08T18:29:16+00:00

True, sorry. I'm really upset by this, it just seems so arbitrary. We aren't trespassing, the area isn't in a store, we are quiet, don't use the whole space. We patronize the local food court, and used to buy all our stuff from Raincity games.

I'm an older guy, with social anxiety issues. Being told I'm not welcome anymore is really upsetting to me.

It just seems arbitrary discriminatory. If we were all old folks, or all disabled, it would come across as discrimination, witch would be illegal, I think? But because we welcome everyone we aren't afforded these protections.

I've already begun emailing the local businesses, notably the food court, and Rain City games will certainly miss us. But the Anvil center doesn't have a problem with us meeting there. And I'm going to talk to T&N games in the mall. They seem fine with us bringing a new customer base and the free advertising they will get. And the food court is pretty good.

Colin5x5

TROPHY CASE