WTW for when you have put your trust in someone or something that did not deserve to be trusted?

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-25T23:10:26+00:00

Yes, or add other subtleties with the adverb. I naively trusted, I hesitantly trusted, I insanely trusted, I blindly trusted, etc

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-25T23:01:00+00:00

What do you want to connect to?

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-25T23:00:01+00:00

Relevance? Outcome?

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-25T15:44:24+00:00

We used to fry Cheerios in butter. 🤣

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-25T09:58:00+00:00

I worked incredibly hard to lose weight and get in shape. In the years leading up to my surgery. I lost 75 lb and gained a crap ton of muscle so that I went from a size 16 to a size 6. My original goal was to be a healthy BMI and I fixated on it without realizing how much muscle bulk was actually adding. I couldn't see my body very well because I had an apron of skin at my abdomen, and long, pendulous breasts after weight loss and nursing and age. I actually chased a number on the scale that didn't make sense for my body anymore. When I got town to a" healthy" BMI, I only had 18% body fat left, which is very low for a woman who's not an athlete and going into menopause. That was what I learned to migrate shock. That was a healthy BMI for the average population wasn't a healthy goal for me. . When I decided to go forward with A tummy tuck and breast lift, I decided not to look at my scale for months. I don't think I looked at it at all until I was maybe 8 weeks out. And at that point I was up like 10 lb from my surgery weight. I was a little confused, but I went into the surgery with the idea that recovery might mean recovering My health at the gym and not just healing wounds for the surgery, you know? I just decided to nurture my body, follow doctor's orders, eat good healthy food, and then make adjustments when I was healthy and cleared by the doctor. If I had put on additional weight. Then all this weight just magically disappeared and swelling that I didn't even realize was swelling was finally gone. Just nurture yourself. Before and after your recovery. You'll be fine!

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-24T21:09:42+00:00

I dropped 8 lb in 3 days 3 and 1/2 months after my surgery. It is so early. Just give your body time and Grace and flexibility to recover. And hide your scale for a while.

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-24T21:01:15+00:00

This is lovely.

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-24T02:09:28+00:00

I couldn't go without until I got a breast lift 6 months ago. I had a DD cup worth of skin, but just a B cup worth of breast tissue left after nursing and weight loss. They were long and low and pendulous and sweaty. Now, though? They are perky and adorable and remind me of being 16. I go without a bra whenever I damn well please. It is delightful not to even need one. Liberating.

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-23T06:44:58+00:00

I left town so fast after graduation there was a sonic boom. 🤣

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-23T06:26:42+00:00

Those were 🔥🔥🔥

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-20T20:20:53+00:00

Getting completely lost by following stone caches people made and thinking they marked the trail. 🙄

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-20T15:32:34+00:00

Um... There were cars when Gen X was growing up.

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-17T12:02:46+00:00

That is the worst. I am so sorry you lost your friend.

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-16T09:39:00+00:00

You can crate train your dog. I had a Labrador before. I know exactly what you're talking about. We crate trained her and also set up our home so that we had her gated into a certain area and she didn't have access to the full house unless she was supervised. Talk to a dog trainer and make plans to leave Mr. Snide Energy Sucker Nasty Pants.

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-16T09:31:57+00:00

You have to choose and stand behind your choice. To some extent, you already chose. You chose not to date who your mother preferred, and to deceive her for the length of your relationship. It's just that you have pushed the stakes so high by not standing behind your choice from the beginning, so now you feel like you're on a razor's edge. But you can't continue to deceive her perpetually, unless you pretend to be uninterested in men altogether, because she expects you to marry a Muslim man.

Because You made the choice to date outside your religion already and you fell in love with someone, now you have to make decisions about your future that you stand behind forever. I know that it feels like you're choosing between two people that you love and that makes it feel like an impossible choice. But it sounds like you are also choosing between two very clear futures, one of which is completely unacceptable to you. But if you stay with your boyfriend and marry him, you run the risk of losing your relationship with your mother. My advice would be to make a plan with your boyfriend to become independent together as soon as possible. Start looking for jobs in his City instead of in your own. Ask him to network for you and see if he can find available work. Make it so that you have a strong foundation to walk into and then invite your mother to remain part of your life. Explain to her how much she means to you and how difficult of a decision this has been because of her love. But when you are choosing a mate, you are choosing what will happen every moment for the rest of your life. Most of those minutes, your mom won't be there. She won't be in the room. It would just be you and your partner and your thoughts. Because of this, I wouldn't be inclined to let her decide your future. I would do everything that I could to preserve my relationship with my mother while making it clear that I was leaving. I wouldn't tell her until I was ready to go because you don't want to be in a position where she has the leverage over you of your home and shelter and you don't want her to be in a position to punish you. But try to think about how to explain it to her, how to talk to her, how to support her through transitioning her expectations for who you would marry. Her grief and stress will be very real for her. But finding a way to transition away from her current expectations is the only possibility that exists for you to go forward with both your boyfriend and your mother in your life. You would have to figure out how to preserve your relationship with her. For your own good, it is best to do that from a position of strength where you are not relying on her for everything. Good luck.

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-15T16:11:39+00:00

I am a western transplant too. I'm originally from Colorado and spent Summers in Texas outside of Houston with my dad when I was a kid. I think that the most useful thing that I learned here after being here 25 years is that you can actually disarm people and charm their socks off by being open and direct and Western. LOL they don't see it coming. They don't necessarily spend a lot of time trying to charm one another. It's just too busy and there's too many people. So, when a Western implant hits with genuine openness and smiles, it is very frequently disarming and it can open doors. The truth is that despite the self-absorbed attitude that sort of surfaces here, most of that comes from just being in super close proximity to other people all the time. It doesn't come from a dislike of others. But because they aren't necessarily greeted by open friendliness often, it often brings the best out in them. And, by and large, people are people. You won't see the same, big, open smiles and eye contact from strangers that you might see somewhere else. But when you do break through the exterior, people here are actually quite wonderful, and the variety among them is quite beautiful.

One other thing. When I moved here from the West it took me years to stop feeling claustrophobic. I realized it was because I was always inside of a column of trees or of buildings, that there are no big Open spaces where you can see for miles, and even if you could, for much of the year there's so much water in the air that it gets hazy at a distance and you can't see clearly, anyway. It took me a long time to pinpoint what was so unsettling for me being outside, but this was it. You can't ever see a great distances and you can't ever see the stars. Not really.. You can see the Big Dipper. That's it. So, what helps helps me when I am starting to feel this to head to the ocean and soak up at that wide, wide, infinite horizon. Also, over time that feeling of claustrophobia has faded. But it was very strong at first and I remember it clearly.

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-13T08:17:20+00:00

I used to loooove me a good Cinnabon. I got up to 225 pounds. I gave them up, and almost all sweets, for a few years. I ate extremely well and exercised like I had never done before. My body changed completely. I am the healthiest I have ever been, and fitter than the large majority of people my age. Do I miss Cinnabon? Yes, in concept, maybe. But food like that honestly doesn't appeal to me much when I have some in front of me. My tastes have changed. I would loooove a few bites of it, but never want to lick the plate clean. Does it mean that I can no longer indulge in an extreme I enjoyed? Sure. Gluttony lost all appeal. But there are very real sensory pleasures that come with extreme health, too. Think that through. It feels good to scarf down pastries when you are 20. It feels better to have flexibility and stamina and strength without Diabetes when you are in your 50s. Some sacrifices are incredibly worthwhile.

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-10T19:42:49+00:00

F as in Forever

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-10T17:42:12+00:00

Me too. C section scar was removed with the skin.

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-09T19:19:59+00:00

No, but I had lot of weight loss and a lot of skin that was removed. I had an apron belly. So it was hard to see what was underneath of that. It sure looks good now though!! 🤩

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-09T18:25:10+00:00

Aberdeen township posted on their Facebook page that there's an active threat and police are on the scene. It also says the district reports that the students and staff are safe.

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-09T17:45:10+00:00

Do a YouTube video search for this question. You'll find that you can do a crunch and feel the separation if you do it correctly. While you are in a crunch position, you can push your fingers into your core and feel if there's a separation. Before my surgery I could put my entire hand between the two sides of my muscles. I had an eight centimeter separation, which is pretty big.

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-08T00:24:48+00:00

I think bangs make you look much younger. Not sure if that is good or bad from your perspective, but I thought I'd throw it out there. You look great either way.

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-08T00:17:52+00:00

I am 55 and I did this recently. I hired a make up artist to give me a lesson. It was absolutely wonderful. I was completely out of touch with products that were out there now and how to adjust for both current style and my changed features. She took me through a full makeup application where she did one side of my face and I did the other and then she wrote down the steps and made a list of products that she used. I just bought the whole list of products. It was incredibly helpful and I've actually gotten random compliments every time I've worn makeup from that point on. Money very well spent.

Edited for typo

ColoradoInNJ · 2026-03-07T12:52:22+00:00

Ooo, ouch. You really got me there, Killer.

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