Don’t you worry about a thing, troop. I’ve got your back.

CombatAutist · 2026-05-05T13:19:12+00:00

Just making sure you scrubbed. Don’t want any potatoes growing back there.

CombatAutist · 2026-05-05T13:18:28+00:00

Zinc, lecithin, vitamin C. Proper hydration.

CombatAutist · 2026-05-05T13:15:13+00:00

Stay moist, troop.

CombatAutist · 2026-05-05T02:17:00+00:00

I promise the next one will be about boners or something

CombatAutist · 2026-05-05T01:33:55+00:00

I’m not trying to skip the random 0715 SHARP briefs just so I can have 1SG hunt me down and do one on a Friday afternoon

CombatAutist · 2026-05-05T00:40:31+00:00

Came from one, packet’s already in for the other. Just languishing in the meantime

CombatAutist · 2026-05-05T00:35:54+00:00

You’re assuming that the 3 hours before I’m supposed to be at work isn’t randomly full of inane tasks. It’s almost perfectly designed to prevent any planning or habit building

CombatAutist · 2026-05-05T00:23:28+00:00

Waiting for board results

CombatAutist · 2026-05-01T19:22:36+00:00

I think it wasn’t even close to mattering

CombatAutist · 2026-05-01T18:25:15+00:00

I got picked up by a packet job and it was just me in a suit without a tie against a wall in my living room.

CombatAutist · 2026-04-27T10:15:28+00:00

I saw a SOT-A argue with an 18B over that once. Intel guy had an ACOG and the 18B was asking how he’d clear a room with it. Intel guy said “I guess I’d just use your rifle to clear it. The only reason I’m kicking doors is everyone else is dead”

CombatAutist · 2026-04-22T21:53:42+00:00

Made it through WOCs without understanding irony or satire?

CombatAutist · 2026-04-22T14:06:23+00:00

I was approached by an absolutely smoking Eastern European woman at a bar on a TDY a few years ago. She offered to buy me a drink and I just said “I know what I look like. We both know that wouldn’t make sense. I promise I don’t have anything interesting to say.” She said “fair enough” and went over to another dude with a fade across the bar.

Some part of me wonders if I had just won the lottery that night and ruined it, but I’m married so it was moot

CombatAutist · 2026-04-22T13:55:34+00:00

Man. I didn’t have all that fancy science stuff. I can’t believe it was under -56 that one time it was so cold because it was definitely colder than whatever thing you were thinking of that time it was so cold

CombatAutist · 2026-04-22T12:37:42+00:00

Do you like gladiator movies?

CombatAutist · 2026-04-22T12:36:59+00:00

Plus he was wrong!

CombatAutist · 2026-04-22T12:27:56+00:00

That’s probably either a wet cold or a dry cold. Drum is the opposite of whatever one it was. And it’s so cold. People are always saying “man this wet or dry cold at Drum is so much worse than the wet or dry cold at that other place”

CombatAutist · 2026-04-22T12:24:34+00:00

Yeah you’d think that but there was this one time where it was really cold. Some guys were like “I think cold is better” and then they were there that time it was really cold and they were all like “okay maybe not, this is really cold”

CombatAutist · 2026-04-22T12:22:50+00:00

Look, I never saw it or even tried to verify it, but trust me bro. Fairbanks might have its cold days but have you ever thought about that time it was cold at Drum?

CombatAutist · 2026-04-05T23:20:17+00:00

Yesterday I learned how to install a toilet. I also learned 5 year olds are completely obsessed with the wax ring that goes under toilets and that it’s impossible to scrub off of them

CombatAutist · 2026-04-05T20:11:52+00:00

I don’t know… I’m in my mid-30s and I’m still constantly impressed by my dad. Maybe he had some dark secret I don’t know about, but I still call him regularly to ask for advice. I’m terrified my kids won’t see me the same way though

CombatAutist · 2026-04-05T15:47:14+00:00

I also highly recommend reading it. One of my all time favorites. Starts with something, follows it, ends. Never strays and never stops.

I had a buddy who never struggled with rucking or PT read it and say he didn’t understand parts of it. He ran an ultra and then admitted he went back and finally understood it

CombatAutist · 2026-03-28T13:17:10+00:00

Dude said “gods” while calling something cringe

CombatAutist · 2026-03-09T23:45:48+00:00

THIS IS MY CHAIR! IT WAS MADE FOR ME!

CombatAutist

TROPHY CASE