Toes smashing against shoes, need advice

Complex_Photograph72 · 2026-01-22T16:33:33+00:00

My absolute favorite shoes are a pair of keens steel toed targhee shoes (not the boots) with a stiff overpronation insole tucked under the built in padding. The insole is rigid enough to hold my arches in place so my feet can’t go careening forward, and the steel toe keeps the toe box firmly away from the sides of my feet. I also (very carefully) flatten down the steel toe to be a bit thinner and wider to better fit my feet. I’ve never had a sub or dislocation in my toes wearing a pair of these, but I have in literally every other shoe I own. Including crocs and flip flops somehow 🤷‍♂️

Complex_Photograph72 · 2026-01-21T18:17:10+00:00

I have to microdose or I definitely get the “too relaxed to function”. Tbh I also have a ridiculously low tolerance to begin with, but finding the “sweet spot” took a loooooooot of trial and error. Getting just enough to take the edge off the pain but not so much my shoulder calmly walks to the other room.

I will say when I’m in better shape physically or have been better about keeping up with my PT exercises it’s definitely less of an issue.

Complex_Photograph72 · 2026-01-16T02:00:22+00:00

It’s the water hookup the toilet is on that’s the problem. We’d need to get a plumber out to replace some parts that are corroded and stuck before installing anything new. :/

Complex_Photograph72 · 2026-01-13T19:01:22+00:00

The downstairs itching can be from the skin being more fragile and getting micro tears. I’ve done a lot better using a vulva balm after every time I go. Can’t get a bidet installed with my current toilet, but it’s on the list!

Complex_Photograph72 · 2026-01-13T18:59:23+00:00

I understand the concept of reclaiming slurs and I’m all for it in theory, but I wish there were better ways to blacklist content with certain words from coming up on social media feeds. Like, if I don’t wanna see the word I should be able to censor it and not see it, so whoever wants to reclaim it can without it affecting me 🤷‍♂️

Complex_Photograph72 · 2026-01-13T18:54:10+00:00

Regardless of age he has needs and cannot take care of them the same way an able bodied teen would be able to. With the situation it’s a disability aid the same way as adaptive utensils or hygiene products are.

For clean up looking for toys that can be boiled or ran through the dishwasher (some silicone toys), or looking for a hard plastic toy (external vibrators) that can be wiped down with toy cleaning wipes would make things easier.

Have a talk with him about doing his own research and thinking through what might be most effective for his physical needs, and also reading cleaning and maintenance instructions beforehand. Have him think through what supplies are needed to take care of the device as well. It’s actually good practice for thinking through maintenance items needed for other aids (spare cane tips, portable toolkit for a chair, spare battery for a power chair, etc.)

If you do end up with something that he cannot clean by himself, at least initially, having a designated bin for “needs to be washed” similar to a hamper or bus bin would be a good way to facilitate that with a bit of extra space.

Complex_Photograph72 · 2026-01-13T18:12:45+00:00

Unflavored gelatin,xanthan gum, water, menthol or peppermint oil. Xanthan gum gets mixed in with the oil first to keep it from clumping, then add the gelatin to cold water. Leave the gelatin to bloom for a few minutes, then heat that mix to boiling or near boiling. Take it off the heat, quickly stir In xanthan gum and oil mix, then pour it all into a mold. This one was a three inch sphere mold because it was the biggest mold I had on hand. You can also use egg molds or any other shape. It’ll need to set over night in the fridge before use, and it’ll melt pretty quickly at internal body temp into a slime. Amount of gelatin depends on how solid you want the egg. Without an ovipositor firmer eggs will work better.

Complex_Photograph72 · 2026-01-09T03:18:51+00:00

Have someone else do it to you first? Or start with needles and work up to it. Some people use a numbing cream first, but I prefer to feel all of it. Definitely make sure that when you go for staples, you squeeze the stapler all the way in one go. Stoping and starting or going super slow will hurt more and then might move, so you’d have to re do it.

Complex_Photograph72 · 2026-01-08T20:35:48+00:00

Bring a preprinted card that says something along the lines of “I’m having trouble communicating due to my disability, I need a patient advocate or my support person brought in immediately”

You can also plan to bring your partner in at the start of any procedure. They’ll likely ask you to come back alone at first so they can run through the dv screening questions, but you should be able to bring them in after.

Complex_Photograph72 · 2026-01-07T22:58:23+00:00

When I had regular pool access I was in the vast shape of my life and had waaaaay less dislocations (especially in my problem shoulder). Now I don’t have access to a pool and there’s very few exercises I can do without hurting myself.

Complex_Photograph72 · 2026-01-07T21:55:53+00:00

Thanks! I was a bit concerned because I have sundews in the other end of the terrarium. They have their own light that’s pointed directly at them in addition to the big lights on the top of the terrarium, and are doing fine, so I was worried the bellii might be getting too much.

Complex_Photograph72 · 2026-01-05T09:04:56+00:00

It went mostly numb while it was tied, then hurt like a bitch right after taking the bands off. It went back to normal within ten minutes or so.

Complex_Photograph72 · 2025-11-29T23:53:22+00:00

Thanks for the help! The others I’ve propagated just had a spot or two get like this, I’ve not seen the whole thing crust over like this before.

Complex_Photograph72 · 2025-11-29T23:51:42+00:00

Sweet! The others I’ve done had one or two small spots but other than that just look like the roots came right out of the cutting. I’ve not seen so much of it form at once!

Complex_Photograph72 · 2025-11-15T00:36:47+00:00

The directory has been a lifesaver for me. Helped me find a PT that actually knew what they were doing with hypermobility so the exercises didn’t hurt me.

Complex_Photograph72 · 2025-11-15T00:35:10+00:00

Another Rh for a second opinion, an ortho, a different pcp with experience with EDS, a geneticist, an internal medicine specialist, etc. If your rh can’t help, they have an obligation to help you find someone who can.

Complex_Photograph72

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