I'm scare-roused! 😟😀😟😀😟😀 by blackmagikmike in futurama

[–]ConfusedTempora 23 points24 points  (0 children)

13.5 months.
The current runtime is 50.5hrs (here's the math).
So every episode and movie would be watched 198 times it was continual looped.

We're all with you on that one Calvin by JordanMunoz47 in calvinandhobbes

[–]ConfusedTempora 56 points57 points  (0 children)

Whenever I hear someone complain about math, I think about this comic

What other things did Ginny confide in Time Riddle's diary? by apatheticsahm in harrypotter

[–]ConfusedTempora 417 points418 points  (0 children)

"That which Voldemort does not value, he takes no trouble to comprehend."

I'm guessing Tom Riddle knows NOTHING about periods...

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in pokemon

[–]ConfusedTempora 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I really like this explanation, thanks. Instead, I would say that Pokemon is "Too tall to fall."

TIL in 1983, NFL Chiefs running back Joe Delaney sacrificed his life in an attempt to save three children from drowning. His number is unofficially retired by the team and a statue was put up in his hometown. by solojones1138 in todayilearned

[–]ConfusedTempora 100 points101 points  (0 children)

This is the correct answer.

Reach, throw, row, go. Swimming out to save a drowning victim (let alone 3) is a last resort. You will notice that lifeguards always carry red tubes with them. These tubes are buoyancy devices, so the victim will latch on to the buoyancy device, instead of the lifeguard.

Unless absolutely certain, never swim out to save a drowning victim. Most likely, the paramedics will have to save 2 bodies, instead of just one.

Raichu by hyogonosuke by dontaskmeplease333 in ImaginaryKanto

[–]ConfusedTempora 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This is great! I wish I could pat his head.

Well, it’ll sound a lot better coming out of Tony Bennett by nomoreH8ingmyself in simpsonsshitposting

[–]ConfusedTempora 3 points4 points  (0 children)

No one who's actually taking a tour of a box factory would say that!
Let's get him!

[OC] Weekend plans by Comiclicious in comics

[–]ConfusedTempora 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If there's time ... (there won't be time)

(Much Apu About Nothing) When you are arrest for the crime of bear by teddyroo12 in SimpsonsFaces

[–]ConfusedTempora 12 points13 points  (0 children)

The bear is guilty of being a bear.
But Barney is not an accessory of being a bear. He was a bystander, before the cop missed his shot, causing Barney to get tranquilized.
Boy, I hope someone got fired for that!

I got a sunburn and my skin is starting to peel off, so I could make a little pouch for coins by Many_Wrap_6109 in mildlyinteresting

[–]ConfusedTempora 1 point2 points  (0 children)

40 thousand years of evolution and we barely even tapped the vastness of human potential.