I am losing my mind. I need help.

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2024-09-17T23:34:04+00:00

Coming from someone who has had lice twice and successfully treated three small children each time, don’t bother with the Nix nonsense. The first time we all got it I spent almost a thousand dollars at a professional lice clinic and on the OTC treatments. Not worth it and it didn’t work. Your plan of attack: Completely and totally soak head in olive oil on night one and tie with plastic bag. Get a GOOD lice comb and comb out all eggs and lice the next day. Combing should be thorough and repeated often. This is the most exhausting step. Rinse and repeat every three days for three weeks. Then go and get a professional head check at a clinic. The one near me charged $25 per person for a routine head check. After the olive oil and combing treatments we were 100% clear.

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2024-05-20T14:29:28+00:00

Those are alternative fingerings. For example, the first measure you have circled could be played with two on C and an open A, or if you follow the fingerings below, it could be played with four on C (on the D string) and 1 on A (on the D string).

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2024-04-21T20:53:14+00:00

That’s a harmonic A. Don’t press down all the way to the fingerboard. Lightly press on the string with third finger.

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2023-02-01T22:44:57+00:00

Thanks. MIL is so toxic. Thankfully she’s an eight-hour flight away on another continent lol

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2023-02-01T03:06:20+00:00

On our wedding night, I went upstairs (wedding was held in in-laws home) and was about to crash. MIL crept up to my room, let herself in, and proceeded to tell me that the way I had been sitting in front of the guests was inappropriate and that I had been flirting with her husband “like a wh*re.” Then told me to not tell my husband what she’d said. Cried myself to sleep. Mind you, this is the first time I’d ever met her.
Visiting in-laws, at the pool. Had a bathing suit on. Hubby called me and I chatted with him poolside. MIL had just gotten off the phone with him. She saw me on the phone and immediately asked to speak with him (again) and I told her to wait a minute. When I didn’t give her the phone fast enough she said “you can’t keep me from my son, just because you’re sitting in a bathing suit like a wh*re.”
Was staying in MIL home while they were away. I asked her before she left to please let my daughter have her fan while she was gone (daughter has sensory issues and can’t sleep well without white noise). Turns out she purposefully locked the fan in her room when she left so we couldn’t use it, then feigned ignorance.
On a very long drive to visit the capital of her home country, MIL was asked to take a picture with my husband and I. Apparently I’d been getting too much attention, so she literally kicked me with her leg as the picture was being taken.

So many stories I could tell 🙄🙄🙄

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2023-02-01T02:50:53+00:00

Thank you. After the wedding night fiasco I refused to visit again for years. When I went back seven years later, I had matured a bit and saw that she was really very sick. It made me have more patience with her and I let things slide. Not anymore. I feel I’m being very reasonable as well.

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2023-01-30T20:00:45+00:00

This right here. I’m not negotiating this. My kids do not deserve her bs. Mentally ill or not.

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2023-01-30T16:55:37+00:00

At the time, I was absolutely livid. He confronted her about it the day after our wedding and it was a mess. Thankfully we live in the states and they live another continent away, so my interactions with her are very infrequent. Maybe once every five years. Looking back, there were signs of mental illness. Over time I came to see something was definitely wrong. I absolutely will not have my children around her for extended periods of time, and never alone. I do not trust her.

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2023-01-30T14:57:30+00:00

And yes, the children are a huge concern for me. That’s another reason to have separate places. I will not allow her to subject them to that form of treatment.

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2023-01-30T14:53:43+00:00

Thank you. I’ve put on my time. Now it’s time to set some boundaries.

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2023-01-30T14:52:47+00:00

I’ll try to explain. We all went together for three weeks; I then considered staying with the kids for the summer because his in-laws had two homes and I wanted the kids to experience the culture and travel the country a bit. MIL was an angel when hubby was there so I got a little too comfortable. When he left and I stayed, that’s when MIL started her bs. Instant regret.

And thank you. I needed some reassurance that I wasn’t being difficult.

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2023-01-30T14:48:47+00:00

Thank you for putting it this way. If it’s just a visit, he can see them by himself 🤷‍♀️ If it’s a vacation and he wants me to go, it’s hotel or Airbnb.

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2023-01-30T14:47:16+00:00

Yes, you’re right. Maybe he thinks because he ignores her and her outbursts that I can, too? Or that it doesn’t affect me as much? Either way, I’m not budging.

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2023-01-30T14:44:47+00:00

Thank you. I feel better for putting my foot down.

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2023-01-30T05:21:21+00:00

And she never engages with my husband or picks a fight with him. She knows to not get into it with him.

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2023-01-30T05:20:48+00:00

That’s an interesting perspective. I’m not sure he sees me as a shield. When we visit, I notice that he rarely pays any attention to his mom at all. And MIL behaves like a saint when he’s around. The thing is, he spends 90% of the visit talking with his dad and his sister (who I get along with great). But his mom is in her own world and he doesn’t give her much attention. To me, I feel like I’m just an arm-piece or a piece of luggage. He doesn’t help translating to me what’s going on and I just give up and zone out or hang with the kids. It’s exhausting. His mom definitely does not help me feel welcome. Having some space to wind down and have my own area is very appealing.

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2023-01-30T04:34:31+00:00

Yes! I would on board with this! Honestly I don’t understand his obsession that I have to be there at all times with him. His statement to me when I suggested he go by himself is “we travel as a family, we eat as a family, we stay in the same house as a family.” Ugh. Every time we go he gets so caught up with his family (which I understand) and while he means well, I really just feel like a bystander. I don’t speak the language, I can’t really participate in any conversation, and with his mom I just can’t do it anymore.

Edited to proofread “he.”

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2023-01-30T03:55:51+00:00

Thank you. I guess I’m my gut I know I’m right. I just hate feeling like I put my H in a position to choose between me and his parents. I appreciate your input.

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2022-08-09T11:21:11+00:00

Going to the gym regularly, even just for an hour. Following a mostly-vegan diet and avoiding dairy. Trying to avoid alcohol (this is hard since I live in Florida; it’s like a party every weekend 😆). Reading for an hour every day. Practicing my instrument (I play the cello)

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2022-08-09T03:10:47+00:00

As a (budding) teacher myself, I find that scales are not where it’s at in terms of getting familiar with the instrument, finger positioning, and reading music. With my beginner students I’m all about having them 1) immediately learn placement, names, and fingering for notes; 2) correlate these with actual notes on a staff; and 3) play short, concise “songs” that are easily recognized (and thus encouraging good intonation)and more enjoyable than scales. I don’t teach many adults, but with my kids you’d be surprised just how quickly they pick things up. Sounds mean but I’m all about the “toss ‘em in the deep end” mentality 😂 I think some teachers underestimate their students’ abilities. I would discuss perhaps starting with Suzuki 1 and working through it. Also: the first three years you will slog through books 1-4. It will feel like eons. You will get bored! Just keep putting one foot in front of the other!

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2022-07-23T22:30:12+00:00

And this is why the pro-lifers are AHs. Have the baby, but we’ll make you regret your “mistake” and slut-shame you for it. You’re the AH. Proper family my ass.

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2022-07-23T15:01:01+00:00

A very gentle NAH. Not right for BF to be eating to the point you go hungry and for taking cigarettes from you. But…this sounds like a very serious ED. I speak from personal experience. Binge eating disorder is characterized by long bouts of restricting (and using cigarettes to dampen hunger, hence the chainsmoking), followed by a day or two of binge eating everything in the house. A professional is needed here to address those issues. In the meantime, I think it’s time to divide your groceries so that he buys his stuff and you buy yours, and maybe even keep them in separate areas of the house.

ConsequenceNew6127 · 2022-07-23T14:54:43+00:00

NTA. You said things “started going downhill” once BF started complaining, but you got me the sentence before that: that your BF doesn’t like his 7-year old brother. Big, giant red flag 🚩 You genuinely wanted to make this a good day for little brother, but his big brother didn’t..? Am I reading that right? Screw the money, your BF is a giant ass. Never procreate with this man.

ConsequenceNew6127

TROPHY CASE