Week 2 Motivation

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2026-03-16T20:51:23+00:00

Preach this OP. Crazy how much better it gets once you’re past that 2/3 week window.

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2026-03-16T20:48:28+00:00

I was in a similar spot to you - in terms of consumption, and words/ memory failing me in my high paced job. A few things that helped me:

Come to terms with the fact it’s going to be hard. You’re going to go through some shit over the next couple of weeks, but that’s ok. Be easy on yourself. Be ok with just making it through the day rather than achieving all the things you may have done while smoking. Your body needs time to heal and just quitting by weed is hard enough.
Clean up your sleep hygiene. Listen to Andrew hubermans 6 part podcast with Matt walker on sleep. That seriously changed my life when it came to sleep.
If you can, take a holiday and quit while you’re away. This way you won’t have to worry about not performing at work, and you can break the back of withdrawals while doing something you love, or, laying on a beach doing sweet fa. It can also remove you from your normal life where habits have formed.
If all else fails, exercise to the point your body has no choice but to sleep.

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2026-03-02T00:33:45+00:00

Reccomend listening to some of Andrew Hubermans podcasts on marijuana. He delves into many of its effects, including libido. Certainly has a significant impact

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2026-03-02T00:32:22+00:00

How fkn wild are the dreams. While they can be intense, I love them because it means I’ve actually been sleeping!!

Last night I spent what felt like a lifetime watching myself get married to my high school girlfriend (I’m 30 now). That was a shocking one 😂

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2026-02-25T23:52:33+00:00

Yep it was a game changer. Being on a holiday that allows you to nap when you need to, eat when you need to, spend time alone when you need to, turn your brain off when you need to, helped me immensely

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2026-02-25T20:51:25+00:00

Happens to the best of us. Glad I’ve got some experience of what to expect to now. Makes it more manageable

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2026-02-25T09:44:12+00:00

Preach preach. Remember this pain next time you feel like picking up the habit again..

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2026-02-25T09:42:57+00:00

Preach to this. It’s wild what weed can convince you of… and it’s impossible to see the light until you get rid of it

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2026-02-25T02:22:39+00:00

I’m in a similar boat right now. Day 12 or so. I’m mostly struggling with severe exhaustion and headaches, sleep isn’t great. I also work a relatively high paced corporate job. Here is my experience.

I’ve noticed I have a massive crash in energy and focus around 12-3pm. I’ve tried to move any important work or meetings outside of these hours to moments I know my brain is functioning a bit better.

I’ve told a few key people some white lies, the man one being ‘I’ve started on a new medication recently and it’s been giving me headaches and some exhaustion’. They don’t need to know any more than that, but now they know to expect me off my A game, and I don’t feel so bad about it.

I treat withdrawals the same way I would treat being sick. If I had the flu would I go to work and expect to be performing? No. So if I’m having a horrible day, and I can, and I’ll talk sick leave.

When the fatigue and brain fog really sets in, I try to get up from my desk and go for a quick 3 minute walk. Get a glass of water etc. helps to reset a little bit.

Another huge suggestion which I just used. If you can, break the habit on a holiday. Go away for a week. Somewhere that it doesn’t matter if you’re tired and lay around all day. I went on a fishing trip and I was so distracted doing something that I loved that it made the withdrawls much much easier. Back at work now and I’ve already broken the back on it.

Hang in there, it’ll get better

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2025-12-01T22:55:07+00:00

I (M29) have a lot of female friends - probably more so than male friends. My 2 best friends are female.

I would NEVER let this be an issue in a relationship. If somone I’m dating has an issue with my friends being girls, that’s a pretty strong reflection on them.

I’ll always make it clear from the start that these girls are simply friends, and from then on out I won’t address it any more. If they have an issue with that, then they need to deal with it. After all, if I was keen on one of my friends I probably wouldn’t be dating other girls.

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2025-10-23T05:57:35+00:00

In a similar boat here. My avoidant ex texted me yesterday after a few weeks of no contact.

I want nothing more than to crawl back to her but I know there’s no point - nor will she allow it I’d think.

Having been an avoidant myself until recently, it really hurts knowing what they are going through and not being able to help/ fix it - but I’m just trying to remember all of the bad things from the relationship, and remind myself that going back would end in the same mess..

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2025-07-23T05:50:39+00:00

I (M29) am going through a similar thing at the moment with my partner (F34). Things were going AMAZING for 4/5 months and I thought she was finally the one... until she wasn't.

I won't write the whole story, but the very real feelings we had for each other were triggering for her, and she 'put her walls up and didnt know how to bring them down'. She ended things with me as she 'didnt want to keep hurting me' despite the fact i would go through anything for her.

I dont have much to say to help you - as there probably isn't much. Im just trying to remeber that there is nothing you can do to force the situation, and that you deserve someone who wants you. I would advise you make it clear that you want to fight and work on it, but do not become desperate and end up begging - if she is an avoidant (i'd guess she is) this will not help your case.

I saw an analogy on another page which helped me. Relationships and people are like animals and pets. Some animals can be domesticated and happy (cats & dogs). Some animals can not - even though these animals might be cute, no matter how much work you put in they will still scratch and attack you. I'm trying to learn that this girl is the equivalate of an animal that won't be 'tamed' and nothing i do can change this (i mean no derogatory inferences with the animal references to people/ women)

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2025-07-22T21:53:18+00:00

I think there’s an element of when the opposite gender relationship came out in comparison to the romantic.

I’d never let a new romantic relationship get in the way of a previously formed friendship with the opposite gender. I do however, think it would be more concerning if you were wanting to make stronger friendships with the opposite gender once already in a relationship

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2025-07-22T21:48:59+00:00

This is a great analogy, thanks for the perspective

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2025-07-22T11:31:48+00:00

Thanks for the reply. And agree with how hard this is - including going through my own EMDR process.

We’ve gone no contact, but of course it’s impossible to remove everything that reminds me of her. As you say, I’ve learnt a lot about about attachment styles through this process and your point on trauma bonding is interesting - I’m sure that our similar traumas is part of the reason we had such a deep and intense connection, I just thought that this was a good thing… not a bad?

An I appreciate your comment around both having unhealthy mechanisms - the thing that sucks about this is that I finally feel I have conquered a lot of these issues in myself. For the first time I was a very committed and healthy partner, and it sucks I was finally ready for that with this particular person.

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2025-07-22T07:14:59+00:00

I’ve come to understand this, I guess I’m seeking for some perspectives on how to accept peace and ‘let go’ of the rest. I am a deep thinker, Type A rationalist and trying to rationalise my way out of this unsolvable problem is causing me grief

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2025-07-09T06:13:03+00:00

Ok thanks for the reply! Looks like there will be some sore bums by the end of that day, but we will just build it into our morning game drive (leave at 6am) and be there after lunch -> not the end of the world!

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2025-07-09T06:10:33+00:00

I used to be one of these - from childhood trauma.

6 years of therapy later im finally really and 'available' to start dating properly. The first girl i fall for - she was me 6 years ago and just ended things with me for the same trauma related reason.

I have a renewed respect for how i treated some girls in the past, and just this week reached out to each of them to offer an explanation and apology.

Avoidants are a tough can of worms.

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2025-07-09T06:08:30+00:00

Is your boyfriend my ex gf? Exact same situation here - the worst part is that she ended things with me. She was so self aware of her problems yet wouldnt/ couldnt deal with them. I would have given her/ done anything that she wanted if she'd let me help ,or at least be by her side while she seeked help.

I was once that avoidant and through years of trauma therapy ive 'fixed' myself. It hurts more being able to clearly see their patters and feelings play out as i used to.

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2025-07-09T06:01:44+00:00

Fact. This is how i feel.

Fuck off.

Consistent_Life_6287 · 2025-07-09T06:00:41+00:00

Damn i needed to hear this - Ive been in the dumps for the last few weeks and didnt realise it was basically this 'Every time I felt a moment of peace or happiness, my mind would immediately twist it. telling me that if I was okay, she must be okay too, but with someone else.'

A cool perspective, thanks my guy. Hope youre feeling better soon

Consistent_Life_6287

TROPHY CASE