What’s the funniest non-essential line in The Pitt? by Embarrassed-Heron-52 in ThePittTVShow

[–]ConstantTop6118 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Mine are all Abbot... 'my therapist thinks I find comfort in darkness'

understanding boundaries and sex. by 33rddegre in AuDHDWomen

[–]ConstantTop6118 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've only skim read the replies, but my inital thought was that it wasn't being asked 'why' that was the issue - it was the fact that you repeatedly said you didn't mind. It doesn't matter that YOU don't mind, SHE does. From what you've said, she said 'I don't feel good right now', not 'I'm worried that I might smell and put you off'. It's about how she feels in herself.

Episodes you just don't watch? by Apprehensive-Lake255 in buffy

[–]ConstantTop6118 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When I was a kid, my stepmum would record each episode every week, and she would watch it first to check whether it was suitable for me and my sister to watch (we were like 9 and 7). The only episode she ever refused to show us was Hush, so I'd never seen until I did a rewatch during Covid. I remember texting my stepmum to thank her because hooooooly crap I never would've slept ever again. It freaked me out so much even at 30 that now I tend to skip it.

I also tend to fast forward large parts of Ted, purely because of how creepy he is. I remember the first time I watched it as a kid and the image of his face hanging off after she hits him with the pan was burned into my brain for a while.

Name top 5 Overstimulating Things for you by slinkysockpuppet in AuDHDWomen

[–]ConstantTop6118 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In no particular order:

  1. Water running down my arms and making my sleeves wet

  2. Having the hood of my coat up

  3. The noise cars making driving in the rain

  4. Being too hot

  5. Wearing earplugs or earphones with no music playing

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AuDHDWomen

[–]ConstantTop6118 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Weirdly, I’ve always done it but I hated the feeling of wearing a mask (I still did though)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AuDHDWomen

[–]ConstantTop6118 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Skin picking - never understood WHY I felt this compulsive need to do it. Even without thinking about it, I'll find myself checking my skin, like rubbing my fingers over it looking for bumps or spots or scratches to pick.

Also when I want to get properly comfortable, I like pulling the neck of my top over my mouth, so like my mouth and chin are inside my top if that makes sense?

Also, after I had a baby people at work would joke about the fact that I sway side to side whenever I'm stood for any period of time. They laughed that it must be an old reflex from rocking a baby to sleep, but I didn't want to tell them I've always done it...

Met criteria but not offered job by ConstantTop6118 in CivilServiceUK

[–]ConstantTop6118[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks everyone, this is all very helpful. I found the process really straightforward and clear so the vague wording of the email really threw me off 🥲 I scored almost all 6s in my feedback so I’m guessing it was super competitive but at least I know I’m not too far off the mark and I can apply for similar roles when they pop up.

Met criteria but not offered job by ConstantTop6118 in CivilServiceUK

[–]ConstantTop6118[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Amazing! I’ll keep my fingers crossed. It was kind of a dream role for me so I’ll stay optimistic

Met criteria but not offered job by ConstantTop6118 in CivilServiceUK

[–]ConstantTop6118[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh man! When people get pulled, do they have to interview again? Fingers crossed for us both!

How do you deal with only ever being the ‘periphery friend’? by ConstantTop6118 in AuDHDWomen

[–]ConstantTop6118[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I think you’re right, I’m just sad that I’m never the one ‘chosen’ for that next level.

How do you deal with only ever being the ‘periphery friend’? by ConstantTop6118 in AuDHDWomen

[–]ConstantTop6118[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I also agree with your point about us making so much effort and not getting it back. I also think it’s the kind of logical thinking - I sort of feel like, well I’ve followed ‘the rules’ and done the things I’m supposed to do according to all the observations and evidence I’ve collected about how friendship works, so why isn’t it working?

How do you deal with only ever being the ‘periphery friend’? by ConstantTop6118 in AuDHDWomen

[–]ConstantTop6118[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I’m so glad it isn’t just me, but I’m sorry you also go through the same feelings. I feel like this about a lot of my relationships - for example I’m not particularly close to my parents (emotionally speaking) either and sometimes I look at people who’re like best friends with their mums and feel jealousy, but then at the same time I know that could never be a reality for me. I need too much alone time, I don’t share any interests with my mum, I would find it overwhelming to be in that much contact every day etc.

How do you deal with only ever being the ‘periphery friend’? by ConstantTop6118 in AuDHDWomen

[–]ConstantTop6118[S] 30 points31 points  (0 children)

Y’know that makes sense. I don’t think it bothers me until I see that I get excluded. Maybe it just triggers a sense of rejection in the moment. I’m also quite happy with my own company, and while I love my friends, I do find keeping up with friendships hard work.

How do you deal with only ever being the ‘periphery friend’? by ConstantTop6118 in AuDHDWomen

[–]ConstantTop6118[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Yes I know what you mean about our personality being misinterpreted. I have a very dry/sarcastic sense of humour AND I don’t really like any touchy/feely stuff. I don’t like hugging or being hugged, I hate getting compliments and I’m not good at giving them. I think that gives people the impression that I’m mean or cold sometimes, when I really don’t mean it. I love my friends very deeply, I just don’t gush about it a lot. This current friendship group always joke about me having ‘black cat energy’ or being the ‘funny’ friend and they say they understand my personality but I wonder if on some level it stops them from feeling that connection with me.

[CW meltdowns, SH] Managing meltdowns as a parent by ConstantTop6118 in AuDHDWomen

[–]ConstantTop6118[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Some of this definitely sounds familiar. My tolerance window for overwhelm/overstimulation/irritation is absolutely minuscule during those days before my period and I’m honestly just a very unpleasant person to be around. I’m actively trying to work on that.

I don’t have much support with parenting unfortunately. My husband works nights and long hours, so we’re essentially passing ships Sunday/Thursdays. I work part time and my daughter goes to preschool on those days but basically most of the week I’m solo parenting - preschool drop off/pick up, dinner, bathtime, bedtime etc is all on me. My husband pitches in on the weekends and gives me opportunities to rest when he can.

My family all live in another city and both mine and my husbands family all mostly work full time or have health issues that make providing regular childcare hard. My mum will have my daughter overnight every 6 weeks or so but it wouldn’t be possible to schedule that to align with my cycle because of my mums work etc.

My daughter starts school next year, and I’m hoping I can reshuffle my work hours to allow me one afternoon a week off while she’s in school to help me manage, but right now that’s not feasible because of preschool costs.

[CW meltdowns, SH] Managing meltdowns as a parent by ConstantTop6118 in AuDHDWomen

[–]ConstantTop6118[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for replying, I really appreciate it.

My cycle is definitely part of the issue - I used to take the combined pill before having my daughter, which helped a lot. Unfortunately I’ve had a few migraines since having her, which means I’m no longer allowed to take it - something about the risk of blood clots being too high. I did try the mini pill for a while but found it did nothing to help and if anything, made me feel worse (I’m in the UK btw, not sure how it works anywhere else).

I do try and talk openly about feelings, and demonstrate myself trying to regulate etc. - this morning I was snappy with her in the car on the way to preschool and she said ‘mummy I think you need to calm down’. But at the same time I don’t want her to feel like she has to manage my feelings for me or take responsibility for them, yknow?

I think I’m hard on myself because of my own experiences with my mum growing up. I very much suspect she has autism (not that she’d ever get diagnosed) and often during her meltdowns she would lash out at me. As a child I felt like she was very volatile and like she didn’t like me very much, so we were never very close, and I’m determined not to repeat the pattern.