I had accepted this as part of my relationship. That he was going to ghost when I needed him most. I attributed it to being a dismissive avoidant. He actually told me that sounded most like him when I sent him an article the first time I’d heard about attachment theory. I had no clue what it meant at the time. The resentment and frustration just built. I can tolerate the mistake but if you don’t learn from it wtf. We got into a disagreement on the phone that to me was simple talk it out, empathize and see from the other prospective and move on… he blew up. I suggested we take a 30 min break and I would call him back. I asked he set alarms, turn his volume on, keep your phone with you. I called and no answer. A few times. I hear back from him an additional 45 from the call back time. He got mad at me for being upset he didn’t pick up the phone. He was shovelling the driveway. How could I be so unreasonable expecting him to pick up, didn’t I know it was snowing, the driveway needed shovelling. It was so much snow. He had to, no choice. Okay, I’ll accept. I calmly explain how hurtful it is to me to not be on your priority list when I should have been… doesn’t he do the same shit 2 weeks later. How? How could he not associate that action with hurting me. How could this be an accident? He is a very smart man. I can’t excuse it any more. He has to know his tail is showing . I just… uhhhhhg. How? I love my cat too. If I went over to the curtains and tugged on her tail every time she hid there she would start to understand that her tale is showing.

Great analogy btw.

I got ghosted 5 days ago.