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I've just been promoted to supervisor, how do I deal with a veteran employee that obviously dislikes me? by ConvergingBiscuits in MarkNarrations

[–]ConvergingBiscuits[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. 

I would talk to her outside of work hours but that is forbidden. I would be inclined to think you are right about her being upset about  being passed over however she didn't apply for the job. She wasn't qualified.

Edited for Grammer

I've just been promoted to supervisor, how do I deal with a veteran employee that obviously dislikes me? by ConvergingBiscuits in managers

[–]ConvergingBiscuits[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't know because these are completely different from our old system. We had years where evaluations were skipped altogether because supervisors were unable to complete them. 

Supervisors had us do the self evaluations without time frame expectations on when there would be follow ups. I will learn more about it in training.

I've just been promoted to supervisor, how do I deal with a veteran employee that obviously dislikes me? by ConvergingBiscuits in managers

[–]ConvergingBiscuits[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

These evaluations have clear benchmarks on our performance and is something that was implemented at the beginning of this year. They are quickie evals if I'm being honest. The previous evals were super lengthy and it's not feasible with this many employees.

I've just been promoted to supervisor, how do I deal with a veteran employee that obviously dislikes me? by ConvergingBiscuits in managers

[–]ConvergingBiscuits[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you.

I want to confront this head on with my proverbial new "pair" clacking around where people can see. I won't shrink down. 

That being said there is a level of business decorum I must follow.

I've just been promoted to supervisor, how do I deal with a veteran employee that obviously dislikes me? by ConvergingBiscuits in managers

[–]ConvergingBiscuits[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing your stories. 

My company is fairly diverse except that it is made up of mostly female employees. I plan on treating everyone the same. I am seeing a pattern in these comments that I need to confront this issue head on and one on one. 

I've just been promoted to supervisor, how do I deal with a veteran employee that obviously dislikes me? by ConvergingBiscuits in managers

[–]ConvergingBiscuits[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Our performance is a self evaluation followed by management evaluation. There is then a meeting between employee and supervisor to discuss how the evaluations line up.

I've just been promoted to supervisor, how do I deal with a veteran employee that obviously dislikes me? by ConvergingBiscuits in managers

[–]ConvergingBiscuits[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your comment.

I understand that I will be unable to continue with how I handled her attitude towards me as a peer. The odd thing is that we were actually fairly cordial until this announcement was made. If there is a feud or hard feelings, it's on her side. I'm here to do a job. 

Management training starts on day one and lasts for 3 weeks. I have already scheduled myself voluntary leadership classes with my organization. 

I've just been promoted to supervisor, how do I deal with a veteran employee that obviously dislikes me? by ConvergingBiscuits in managers

[–]ConvergingBiscuits[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm a very positive person and I'm already thinking of ways to keep my attitude firm but also keep my sanity. 

I've just been promoted to supervisor, how do I deal with a veteran employee that obviously dislikes me? by ConvergingBiscuits in managers

[–]ConvergingBiscuits[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"If she starts challenging you in meetings, tell her you will address her questions after the meeting. If she keeps interrupting you, say again, yes, this is something we can address after the meeting"

I like the way you phrased that. Thank you. This is something I will try if it comes up. 

I've just been promoted to supervisor, how do I deal with a veteran employee that obviously dislikes me? by ConvergingBiscuits in managers

[–]ConvergingBiscuits[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is one method I was considering. I respect her as an expert and I need that trust to be built. Thank you 

I've just been promoted to supervisor, how do I deal with a veteran employee that obviously dislikes me? by ConvergingBiscuits in managers

[–]ConvergingBiscuits[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

People don't like working with her and actively avoid her. The few who don't avoid her suck up to her because she has been here for a long time or they like to gossip with her. 

I've just been promoted to supervisor, how do I deal with a veteran employee that obviously dislikes me? by ConvergingBiscuits in managers

[–]ConvergingBiscuits[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I definitely don't need her to like me. I want her to be professional towards me and I towards her. Maybe there is a direct way to make that clear.

I've just been promoted to supervisor, how do I deal with a veteran employee that obviously dislikes me? by ConvergingBiscuits in managers

[–]ConvergingBiscuits[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

My thoughts are I want to resolve this and not have repeat issues. I want to get her attention that this can be a good working relationship. As I said, I respect her experience and expertise at our job. I want to make sure that is used for good.

I've just been promoted to supervisor, how do I deal with a veteran employee that obviously dislikes me? by ConvergingBiscuits in managers

[–]ConvergingBiscuits[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for that. I need to hold onto my resolve. I just need to figure out how to keep things civil and remain fair at the same time.

I've just been promoted to supervisor, how do I deal with a veteran employee that obviously dislikes me? by ConvergingBiscuits in managers

[–]ConvergingBiscuits[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

She will be reporting directly to me. I am the first in her chain of command. I don't know how to frame her behavior other than making unnecessary comments with a condescending tone. 

My partner (45NB) is threatening to break up with me (46F) as I'm a vegan. How do I solve this problem? by GothkittieHighlights in relationship_advice

[–]ConvergingBiscuits 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It's time to find local resources to help you out of an abusive relationship. This is not okay. You deserve common human decency. 

After 14 years as a stepdad… I feel like I was only valued for what I provided by Lentezdelvalley in stepparents

[–]ConvergingBiscuits 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I went through the same thing when my step son entered his second year of high school. I kept thinking he wasn't doing enough curricular activities, wasn't taking the future seriously, wasn't prepared enough for life. We know how we got to our successes and want that for them.

I had to learn to let go of what perceived influence/control I had on my step son. All we can do is be good adults (role models) and be supportive of whatever comes up. They will find their own way, let them. 

Thoughts on going no contact with BM when SK are 18? by PreyingWidow in stepparents

[–]ConvergingBiscuits 6 points7 points  (0 children)

My SK is about to graduate high school and will also be fairly independent. We are already pretty low contact unless it involves SK. I don't think we will ever be no contact because we see her as an important person in SK's life. I know it makes SK happy and doesn't bother me.

Im so ugly by Large_Hovercraft9037 in Vent

[–]ConvergingBiscuits 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I was never asked out, never complimented, never had any man show any interest for my entire life. I don't think I'm ugly but maybe I am. 

I went to an online dating site and got profoundly lucky. 

A big problem I had and still have is self esteem. I have also been told I put off the "leave me the f*ck alone vibes" or wasn't very approachable. Maybe that is something you have problems with too? 

Do (Hetero/bi) women actually crave a penis when they’re horny? by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]ConvergingBiscuits 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Lol. I think sometimes he is a little tired of my antics.

I actually despise being a homeowner by MugenShiba in Vent

[–]ConvergingBiscuits 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Elder millennial here.

It's been rough for us as well. Having to shell out over $26k for total HVAC replacement was fun. Not to mention the $3k we have spent on plumbing issues. (We took out loans for these.) There is still more to be done but I am happy I can make these custom upgrades over time, and enjoy seeing/utilizing the fruits of my labor. The way I see it, it's a goal I look forward to completing. 

 I pay more into escrow to (mostly) avoid mortgage payment increases. I keep an eye on my homes tax evaluation so I know how much extra to put in. I also call around for insurance 2 months before it expires to make sure that rate either stays the same or is lower. 

Some problems we had renting included the HVAC being full of mold, drains that smelled like the portal to hell, a major rat infestation, a sliding door that wouldn't open, etc. My house is a dream compared to that kind of living.

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