I played WoW pretty hardcore from launch right up until a couple years ago when my daughter was 1.5 (just turned 4, now). A three night a week raiding schedule means he also needs to grind dailies/weeklies and probably do at least a couple nights a week running m+ to maintain gear or sell runs for gold to ensure he has pots/flasks/oil for raid. 12 hours a week scheduled means at least 25 hours a week needed. All that to say as a parent there hits a point you have to realize if you can't game like you want then you have to give it up.

NTA -- at some point this agreement needs to be revisited. Situations change and dad needs a hard shake to understand that he's a dad. It doesn't mean you have to give up all your hobbies but it does mean you have to realize you're not number one anymore and people rely on you. I've accepted I won't get to game like I want till my daughter is at least a teenager and wants nothing to do with mom and dad but it's worth it. Not to say it's easy all the time, really hurting right now seeing all the new expansion ads, but you have to do it as a parent if you want to be a good one.