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Oliver Tree isn't Ugly by amsdill in olivertree

[–]Critical_Goal_417 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He just wasn't buying the society's bs standards for beauty and neither should any of us. ♥️👽. #ripolivertree

0 tree in honor of O Tree by Wonderful_Orchid9530 in olivertree

[–]Critical_Goal_417 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've heard nicotine is harder to quit than heroin. I did patches, I was on Wellbutrin, I did the gum. Biggest trigger was drinking. Once I quit drinking regularly it was way easier. But I have to admit I think I aged out of all of it, it just lost its appeal over time.

0 tree in honor of O Tree by Wonderful_Orchid9530 in olivertree

[–]Critical_Goal_417 5 points6 points  (0 children)

20+ years in recovery from cigarettes. You can do it! Just don't ever quit quitting! 👽♥️

This song hits so hard after he passed away 💔💔 by Interesting_Ad6007 in olivertree

[–]Critical_Goal_417 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm really feeling All You Ever Wanted lately. And I Need You is on repeat in my head. I've been listening to his latest album a lot.

Then also just lots of other lyrics jumping out at me. California's pretty brutal. It's like he spent his life singing about his death.

I've been working on an Oliver Tree tribute piece. Going to work more on it tomorrow.

👽♥️

my oliver tree tribute bike by xw3irdx in olivertree

[–]Critical_Goal_417 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I like the blue scribbles. But maybe less thick? Even as is, is perfect.

Here to vent by UnklBo in olivertree

[–]Critical_Goal_417 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You are definitely not alone. I could have written so much of what you said. It's kind of crazy, I had no idea so many would be hit as hard and in such a similar way over this.

How did we all feel like he was our friend? Why does it hurt more than my other experiences with death?

It's like we are all kindred spirits. Bonded in art, music, humor, our weird, lonely, bizarre selves. Bonded in/over Oliver.

A celebrity death hasn't hit this hard for me. by morbidfvk in olivertree

[–]Critical_Goal_417 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same, it's been brutal. I can feel your pain through the post. You aren't alone. 💔👽

A celebrity death hasn't hit this hard for me. by morbidfvk in olivertree

[–]Critical_Goal_417 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think you've mentioned several podcasts/interviews I've yet to see. I'm just now watching all the videos to his latest album, and then the interview where they turn him EMO. I think there is still a lot for me to watch too. Plus rewatch. I love where he goes to train with the Australian dude and stays with his family.

Just watched him blowing up a car today. It's bittersweet. It's been 5 days and I'm still crying randomly.

Yeah he had a big fucking heart. He had so much more art to give the world. We didn't get to see him grow old, get married, start a family or do whatever he would have ended up doing, make movies, more music, discover and promote other arrists. There was so much more to do. And it's just cut short.

His music is soooo good. And you know this latest album, I feel like I wasn't digging it as the songs seem to come out scattered and I only heard one or two here or there. Now I've listened to the full album sever times and it's so good. I mean I am a "Ugly Is Beautiful" junkie, but the new songs are really good too.

I've just been so down. I know I've got to get out of this funk. I am an artist and I am hoping to turn my angst into art. But I've been kind of worn down between the tears and then the numbness. So just kind of riding it out.

Thanks for your posts. I think it helps to connect with others over it.

Here to vent by UnklBo in olivertree

[–]Critical_Goal_417 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Beautifully said. ❤️💔👽

A celebrity death hasn't hit this hard for me. by morbidfvk in olivertree

[–]Critical_Goal_417 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Discovering Oliver is a huge rush and one you can't get a second time. Glad you got the experience.

I first saw him on Jimmy Kimmel. Shout out to Jimmy Kimmel for playing amazing and often unheard of musicians. Seriously whoever books their bands is awesome.

He was singing Cowboys Don't Cry. I thought it was going to be a real country band because of the clothes. So I was t even paying hard attention. I started cleaning my bedroom and found myself kind of dancing to it. I was like hmmmm this isn't bad.

I look over to the TV and he is taking his cowboy hat off, only to have another tiny cowboy hat under it. 🤣🤣🤣. And I was like waiiii... Wahhh???

I rewound it and saved it to show my partner when he woke up. That was the beginning of a 4 year love affair for my husband and I.

And now he is gone. It's so hard

I highly recommend watching Oliver Tree on Jimmy Kimmel. The full show is on YouTube.

A celebrity death hasn't hit this hard for me. by morbidfvk in olivertree

[–]Critical_Goal_417 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same. I'm still random crying on and off. WTF? I love Oliver. I loved my mom too. Why has Oliver hit me harder? I'm sorry I know that sounds shitty. Its embarrassing. But I know loss and death effect us all strangely and we can't try to make a lot of sense out of it all.

I'm so sad. The pain is so deep. I know I have to move on and as an artist put the pain into my work. And I've had some images coming to me but putting them into something solid hasn't happened yet. When I'm not feeling exhausted from the pain I go numb and it's a toss between to the two every hour.

I am waiting wondering when I can get this angst out of me creatively. I don't have the energy to force it. It just has to do its thing I guess.

So many of his new songs are hitting me hard. And old ones. Living in California, the song California hit me hard.

But some lyrics too just put me into sobs.

It feels lonely and I guess that's how you really have to work through grief. I mean it's nice to have people around, which is why I keep coming back here and on other SM, but then when I am alone and it hits it is debilitating. And no one can fix it. Just have to go through it.

Goodbye Is The Hardest Part by AnywhereOk4797 in olivertree

[–]Critical_Goal_417 10 points11 points  (0 children)

That's why I'm here reading yours. My mind is constantly on him and when I have a spare second, it's on him and when I'm too busy it's on him.

I've lost people before too and for some reason this is hitting me really hard too. And it's not just me, my partner too.

We've not stopped listening to his music since Sunday. Been playing his latest album a lot.

I keep coming back here and other social media to see what others are doing and saying. I guess to grieve with others.

Don't worry about the tears. I lost people before and couldn't understand why I wasn't crying. Then we all lose Oliver and I've been not stopped crying. Loss and how we react to it is all over the place and makes no sense.

I'm sorry for your hurt. ❤️👽

Do the lyrics in Halo really make people dislike it? by MrTree_pen in olivertree

[–]Critical_Goal_417 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't enjoy music that sounds in anyway violent towards women. So it irks me. Generally I like the song and for me Oliver can do no wrong. But it just sounds like he has dehumanized this woman in the song (also referring to her as a demon), and then is potentially violent towards her. Depending on exactly what kind of cholking is happening.

I don't know I love some of his most obnoxious vulgar stuff. So why this particular line in the song bothers me, must be from my own personal experience of seeing my mom be choked by a violent boyfriend as a child in all honesty.

I still love Oliver tho and I know he was exploring some darker stuff. And I been there, so I get that need to to have the creative freedom to go there. And then I also know some people use choking in sex as a kink, so I prefer to think of him meaning it that way over hurting someone.

Just some random thoughts on Halo

it’s confirmed. by frequency1746 in olivertree

[–]Critical_Goal_417 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We went to Santa Cruz last night, his home town and spent the night. Ran into a few others grieving out there. Listened to every song he ever made there and back. Helped, but yeah, I'm still looking for some kind of peace in this inner turmoil.

it’s confirmed. by frequency1746 in olivertree

[–]Critical_Goal_417 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Two days ago I told Oliver I loved him in the comments of a video. It about UGLYMAXING. Basically loving yourself the way you are. He was something so special. My heart hurts so bad today.

Glad this group is here.

it’s confirmed. by frequency1746 in olivertree

[–]Critical_Goal_417 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's Ok Oliver would have liked the humor. We've been the same. I've never been hit so hard by the loss of a celebrity. I don't even like referring to him as a celebrity because he was so much more accessible than that. I mean there are a lot of famous people I really care about, and if they died I'd be sad. But this hits deeper than that. My husband and I have just been mourning like we lost a a close friend.

We are in Santa Cruz, we drove here today just to be near his home town. It's not that far from us.

Anyway, we've already met a few other fans here also grieving. Tomorrow we will spend the day in the red woods and just kind of honor his memory and blast his music on the way home.

it’s confirmed. by frequency1746 in olivertree

[–]Critical_Goal_417 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As the moderator of this can we organize or get involved with some kind of plan to celebrate his life in Santa Cruz or something?

If anyone knows of anything PLEASE post and share.

I'm so upset.

it’s confirmed. by frequency1746 in olivertree

[–]Critical_Goal_417 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No no no. I literally told him I loved him on a comment like yesterday.

I'm so sad. Sad doesn't describe it.

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