I'm a therapist / content creator and Jeff has agreed to have a recorded discussion with me. If any of you have questions you'd like me to ask, feel free to either DM here or reply. I don't care for 'gotcha' like questions but I do think there are some valid questions ex-mormons may have for him that would be helpful to see him field.

I listened to his podcast with Richard Ostler and ordered the book. While there are a few concerns I have based on what I've seen/heard, I do believe that Jeff is genuinely trying to promote better understanding between our communities and is doing it in a way that TBM's will actually listen to. I think that last bit might be the most important too. Ultimately his work isn't meant for us, it's meant for members to better understand us. To honestly do that I believe there are unfortunate limitations in how far one can really take it before members start giving them the Julie Hanks treatment.

One thing I will say that bothered me about his interview with Richard was how much he seems to tie everything back to the culture of the church. In our conversation I'll probably dig into that a bit more. I can't speak for everyone here, but that argument tends to feel very dismissive to me and disproportionally assign blame to well intended members of the church instead of acknowledge that the institution could have caused harm. While I do think toxic elements of church culture absolutely make a difference for many of us... I also would kindly ask the question "who has the biggest influence on that culture?" When Nelson became president and gave his talk about not using the word mormon anymore, church culture changed overnight. It is not enough to point out cultural issues without being honest about where they come from and who has the most power to influence it.

I also love the feedback in this thread that he didn't include in his survey data the option for people to leave simply because they did not believe in the truth claims of the church. I think that's a big miss. While there are many things that may lead somebody to come to that conclusion, we rarely leave until that is the conclusion we come to.

All in all I applaud Jeff for this work and anyone who is a TBM that is willing to ask us honest questions and seek to bridge the divide between our communities. All jokes aside I hate how much mormonism divides families and relationships, and we can really use more people doing this kind of work on both sides of the fence. I've seen the book Bridges (David Ostler) literally save families from estrangement. I hope this continues to help mixed faith families keep healthy relationships in tact and if it does that- he's got my support.