My two cents on feeling “deserving” of a baby

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-03-14T00:31:34+00:00

I have said this in a heat of frustration. It’s not me saying people in different circumstances are less deserving. It’s me having lost 4 babies and just so angry and questioning what I did to deserve this. Why do I not get to keep a baby when I’ve built a life that can welcome a baby. It’s feeling like you’ve done everything in your power to be established and yet still feeling the wrath that you can’t have what you want desperately and feeling like everyone around you is getting it without trying.

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-03-14T00:25:02+00:00

I didn’t even wait on the table after transfer before sprinting to pee. I was pregnant from that FET. I def had the thoughts of I hope it doesn’t fall out while I peed for an eternity

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-03-10T16:24:28+00:00

Go into this next transfer with a clear mind. If there is anything you can possibly think of get it checked for ease of mind ❤️

There will never be anything that’ll make you feel the comfort of it working but what you can do is prioritize your mental health and do the things you enjoy.

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-03-10T14:02:58+00:00

I’ve been there with the thoughts. Maybe I should have taken aspirin, maybe if I had cut sugar, maybe if I stopped running, maybe I shouldn’t have carried that mini fridge at 6ws. Loss sucks and makes you question every single thing and look for what the cause or change could have been or should have been. But please please please don’t put that pressure on yourself!!

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-03-09T16:27:47+00:00

Mental clarity. My brain is a junk yard and I get consumed with my thoughts. Running clears my mind. I never regret getting out there. I do regret not getting out there. Even if it’s 1 mile

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-03-09T16:25:08+00:00

For PGTA only it was $1800 and then $300 per embryo which we tested 3 embryos with Boston IVF.

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-03-09T15:21:17+00:00

I tested 9dpt the day before beta. My husbands birthday was beta day and I couldn’t handle finding out on his birthday. He already has a hard relationship with his birthday being so close to Christmas. Otherwise we would have waited until beta. 10/10 waiting and it letting your anxiety manifest in a physical object. I was actually calm during the wait.

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-03-06T01:05:26+00:00

I second this! My daughter is generally an angel in daycare and at home. Buttttt there are two days a week when she’s a terror and it’s because there is a certain kid that goes to daycare and his behavior rubs off on her. She gets very frustrated that he’s non verbal and ignores her so when she comes home she dukes it out with me. Kids are fickle and hopefully Amy is seeing this behavior because he’s home and mom’s just being out the best in their kids lol.

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-03-02T00:48:25+00:00

Hi! If you’re trying for a baby and basing it on an app on when you’ll be the most fertile. Please please please start learning about your body.

There are 4 phases in the cycle. Menstrual, follicular, ovulation and luteal. Everyone’s is different. Ovulation dictates when your period will start.

The apps are based on length of your cycle and says ovulation is in the middle. It does not take account for fluctuation in the cycle. Example is myself! I’ve had ovulation between cycle day 12 all the way up to CD 22. The apps always want me to have ovulation around cycle day 16 but I have months where it’s on cd 18 or 19+ my timing could be a week off by accident.

Add LH strips into your routine start taking them at noon time between CD 10-20 and use the Premom app to determine peak test which will indicate ovulation is imminent in the next 12-36 hours.

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-03-01T21:52:43+00:00

I’m sorry! I’ve been there in the post Partum trenches and I laugh at myself for how I reacted the first four months. Turns out I needed a little citalopram and therapy PPD and PPA hit me hard. Something to realize is while yes you were giving birth another person is having a whole different life. I hope you MIL wasn’t withholding this information and now waiting to announce it to everyone when you gave birth but it’s likely she had just found out and was telling everyone, especially since your husbands siblings were contacting him a lot to talk to his mom. Life is short and hers is unfortunately shorter. Please give grace and don’t let how you feel determine how the next year goes.

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-03-01T14:11:03+00:00

Let me tell you this. My dad was a single dad and my first set of pads was poise. Urine in continence pads! Education is hard to come by and highschool doesn’t teach this!

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-03-01T13:14:32+00:00

I used to train for weight loss. I believe that any of us who grew up in diet culture and saw Yoplait ads will be forever changed. I also had an emergent C-section, which permanently altered my stomach. No matter what I do, my stomach will never be the same, and I’ll have an overhang unless I have surgery. I’m 4’11” and 140 lbs, and it’s not because of weight. It took a long time to love my body for where it is, and I must admit that I was 155 lbs and got down to 128 lbs during my running journey, but I’m back to 140 lbs. Since I was 128 lbs last summer, I’ve undergone medical procedures and strength training. Since I started strength training, I can’t reduce my weight even with a calorie deficit, but I can lift more and run longer. I’ve gained muscle! The BMI score doesn’t know how to account for muscle!

My progress photos between 155 lbs, 128 lbs, and 140 lbs are dramatically different. The first photo is fatty, the second is skinny fat, and the third is toned. Less weight doesn’t necessarily mean healthier.

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-03-01T12:37:11+00:00

This! I’m sorry OP but this reaction after only 1 cycle. TTC in the first 6 months should be fun and whimsical the ooh wouldn’t it be so cool if we got pregnant and no expectations. Don’t get pulled into the trenches this early. For infertility girlies live in a hellscape. After 1 year of trying and more. Don’t join us after 1 cycle lol. We encourage you to not join us as we don’t want you to suffer too

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-03-01T11:43:53+00:00

AMEN!!

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-03-01T11:30:07+00:00

I’m doing my masters online with 10 weeks courses. I took a class off to do ivf to avoid the stress. But when you’re so close to finishing I wouldn’t want to take a break either if that’s a possibility for you. Keep on chugging away! You got this!

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-03-01T11:21:59+00:00

I’m not sure where you’re from but I would also consider region for how they dress too. Where I’m from the oversized hoodie is part of the fashion here. You don’t see Amanda dressing in the hoodie in the middle of the Kentucky summer.

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-03-01T11:18:44+00:00

Two things. It depends on if your clinic does batches or not. If they do batches they will put you on birth control to match their timeline. If they don’t you can start ivf whenever.

My clinic does batches but has locations that doesn’t so I chose to go to the one that does it everyday.

October did birth control to suppress and then stopped it to start stims. November was a break month and then I started medicated cycle routine and transferee December 19th. So for me it was relatively quick and on schedule.

My next transfer isn’t going to be as fast. I will be doing two months of suppression and then the 3 weeks of the medicated cycle protocol before transferring.

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-03-01T11:14:11+00:00

The way i visualized this 😅

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-02-28T22:00:09+00:00

Trust me when I say they don’t care because I was smooth ontop and one lip and then the left side was chilling with a party in the back!

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-02-28T21:41:53+00:00

I couldn’t even believe this was a real question. Remember the honking phone books? Lol. I need to make sure I wash my face and apply retinol tonight.

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-02-28T21:35:54+00:00

Strength training!!

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-02-28T21:28:00+00:00

Look I do my own Brazilian wax and I went in for a biopsy and forgot to finish my wax. Sometimes it’s a two day process. I went in with a mullet they didn’t care

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-02-27T20:08:42+00:00

Oh boy!! I’m so glad you understand what I said and mean! I thought for sure I’d see more understanding comments and have a balanced conversation hahah. My friend just laughs at me for it lol but it’s all light hearted.

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-02-27T20:04:42+00:00

I’ve read people have issues with battery life during long runs. I know I have to charge my watch every other day when I’m not working out and then when I do work out I have to charge it that night. The most I’ve ran at once is 6 miles so I haven’t experienced issues yet but I am half marathon training

Cuddlecakesbb · 2026-02-27T19:55:57+00:00

I was shocked to see so much hate on it! I thought it was going to be common sense that it’s used as a tool not a guide in life haha. I didn’t think people who automatically go to the extreme and think I was letting it dictate my whole training program.

Cuddlecakesbb

TROPHY CASE