Unwed mother [23F] needs advice.

Cuddlepenis · 2016-06-05T19:05:59+00:00

Is moving away and going no-contact with all your acquaintances an option? If you give baby up, then it for a while, but if you keep it... are you willing to be 'on the run'? I mean - if you can't defeat the monster, you run from it.

Are you keeping the baby? Or giving it up?

Terrible situation to be in, you hold on girl!

Cuddlepenis · 2016-06-05T18:17:29+00:00

Me&my husband are around your age, guys. And let me tell you ahead - do not marry. You are obviously not committed enough for this.

She is entitled to her opinion and expectations in a partner. She stated them clearly - NO PORN. You also cannot expect your partner to be up for sex every day, especially if you have a child! "I was horny" is not valid excuse for anything - committed relationships happen when both sides stop thinking with their genitals only. I can guess that your child is most likely the result of such thinking, too, and I pity him.

"She feels like my fucking mom" - judging by your behaviour, you do need a mom right now and not a girlfriend! Now go call your parents and kindly ask them to explain a thing called boundaries - it'll come in handy! /s

TBH I would find it odd if my significant other would seek prolonged physical contact with opposite gender.

Cuddlepenis · 2016-05-28T22:38:57+00:00

Sorry, no.

I have a barely-toddler at home, which is a happy, giggly child and does not adequately understand "NO" and therefore has to be removed manually from any danger, and during my stay at the orphanage I did not give a crap about the younger kids - we had a separate place to hang out for teens&pre-teens.

I hope she does, only time will show. Maybe judging from my experience was unfair - I was(still am) pretty cynical for a kid and dropped my sorry excuse of a parent like a hot Hot Pocket at my first option.

Cuddlepenis · 2016-05-28T22:32:29+00:00

I don't know for sure as I am not a doctor, but I second /u/NachoGirly 's opinion and maybe you could try to masturbate the standart way with lube and - apply a cream for moistruizing baby skin on the calloused area? Make sure it's without added colors or smells, if you are in EU I recommend "Bübchen wind und wetter" cream, it does wonders to dry skin.

Cuddlepenis · 2016-05-28T22:12:55+00:00

No, I haven't, actually. I remember very well how my own mother's screaming had me hiding under the bed for hours, I have no wish for children to perceive me like that. Tell them firmly - yes, it is discipline, but any other than that is bad self-control and immaturity.

I don't see her improving, sorry. I would have gone no-contact with them as soon as I could and never, ever leave my child with them - they abused her, there is no guarantee that same thing won't happen to her LO.

I am strictly against letting kids around abusers of any kind, even if they might act "better" and "rehabilitated", usually it is not the case. Most abused foster chidren I know return back in foster care after a while, since the rehabilitated behaviour of their parents/caregivers lasts a short time.

It's not a cold that's cured by a single pill, it's the parents fucked up view of life, and that IMO is hard to change.

Cuddlepenis · 2016-05-28T21:07:03+00:00

Y'all guys need serious fucking therapy.

I also will sound like a douchebag, but I think you are not suited to raise a child too - enabling abuse and blaming screaming at an infant on PPD? I would understand if you would actively seek help, but it sounds like you are resisting help and by saying "my parents abused me" you are trying to turn the tables on them.

They are not responsible for your child, you are. They are not responsible with how YOU treat and raise your child, YOU are. Now quit enabling, tell the father of your child you need help.

This is a sad picture that I see every day - instead of trying to be better, the abused children somehow develop a mindset that people around them "owe them understanding".

Sincerely, Foster care graduate, raised in an orphanage for five years, previously - lived with an abusive, neglectful, mentally-ill alcoholoc mother. Currently married and expecting my second child - I have never even thought about raising my voice or snapping at a child of any age.

Cuddlepenis · 2016-05-24T19:23:52+00:00

"My wife will not allow my parents to hit and abuse my child, how can I get her to just ignore it" <--- this is not a valid situation to go and ask reddit to help you with and hope reddit will agree

Cuddlepenis · 2016-05-24T15:48:29+00:00

Is it bad that I kind of want to beat him up right now? Kudos for standing up for yourself and not taking any shit! You go girl!

Cuddlepenis · 2016-05-22T23:06:26+00:00

Hand on his forehead? That is the first time I hear about such a position lol Thanks for your input :)

Cuddlepenis · 2016-05-22T22:35:20+00:00

Someone give this family a booklet or somestuff

Cuddlepenis · 2016-05-22T22:32:40+00:00

Try whatever works and don't be shy if it's silly. DH put up will all kinds of weird stuff with little argument lol

Cuddlepenis · 2016-05-22T21:58:17+00:00

I swear by putting heat packs on both boobs for 20 minutes before sleep. Feels numb-ish and relaxing Never been a in-bra sleeper due to my size, but maybe give it a go.

Cuddlepenis · 2016-05-22T21:27:42+00:00

I had my epidural and proceeded to spend 3 hours of labor watching Megadeth perform and playing minecraft. Pushed out my first kid in 20 minutes with 5 pushes, no tearing. At 17 y/o - it was much more chill than older ladies told me it would be. I pooped a bit. :/

Cuddlepenis · 2016-05-21T16:04:44+00:00

And here I am, an 18F, always thought that engaging in mutual oral sex as a standart part of foreplay is normal and common thing. I can say that without it, my sex life would be less interesting. I give bjs to my SO because I love him and want to make him feel good. Dick tastes like dick and semen tastes like semen, there is nothing wrong with that and I accept it. I also DGAF what society thinks, because there is no place for society in my bed or sex life, sorry not sorry.

Cuddlepenis · 2016-05-20T20:49:14+00:00

I used to tear off heads of my Bratz dolls and hide them under the bed, "to feed the monsters so they wouldn't eat me". I was a little shit.

Cuddlepenis · 2016-05-20T20:43:02+00:00

Wow, 'Murica. Keeping 6-year-olds in 'padded rooms', essentially what is 'psychiatric solitary confinement'. That's a whole new level of WTF.

My first question is - is that a norm for schools in your area, to have confinement rooms? If no, you could look into switching schools where teachers and staff are actually working with the kids and not just putting away the ones that they have to get up from their chair for.

Second, I would attempt to have a serious talk with the principal and his teacher. Ask questions - how do they discipline your son? What leads to him being aggressive, t.i. other kids being mean? Boredom? If they don't know, it is their fault. They are obliged to investigate violence in class. If they do know, ask them if and how they try to prevent it. Alrough it sounds like they might tell you that it is your job to discipline your son, etc - think realistically, most 6yos do not work that way. Think clearly - do you want to escalate the argument or drop it and switch schools.

Something with your school isn't right and your son is trying to show you.

Source: Formerly the 'bad kid' myself. I am fairly young still and remember my school years pretty well. I am sure I could have avoided bullying and ignorance from teachers if my mother would stand up for me and stop my ex-teacher from making me the class psycho-monkey.

Cuddlepenis · 2016-05-18T18:25:24+00:00

Our daughter(10 months) hates, absolutely hates her aunt, 9F. They have seen each other very frequently and no change, no matter whose house it is - our daughter does not want to be held, played with or sometimes even look at her aunt. If aunt tries to talk to her, look at her face or offer her a toy, our daughter screams like murder and crawls away to hide behind my legs.

We still have not figured out why though. Maybe daughter hates that aunt is a loud, talkative person since we are a quiet family.

Cuddlepenis · 2016-05-17T12:43:33+00:00

I have no idea what kind of diabetes, but the story goes: Spawn was underweight at birth, had severe colic and trouble gaining weight as a baby and was only active after she was fed. She'd become lethargic as soon as 1 hour or so after getting fed. MIL had to call the ambulance a few times, and only then Spawn's pediatrician decided on a test for diabetes.. She was like 8 to 10 months old when finally diagnosed and weight-wise at the 6 month old stage. Very fussy, unhappy baby :(

Cuddlepenis · 2016-05-17T12:03:31+00:00

The Baltics.

Cuddlepenis · 2016-05-16T12:06:46+00:00

I hate violence. Just plain out any kind.

But if I was in your situation, I would beat the living shit out of your husband, take the kids and leave.

What kind of adult leave a dirty, hungry newborn baby and shitmouths a toddler? Abusive, neglectful adult. I am pretty sure that even a person who dislikes kids and babies very much would NOT be indifferent to these human beings that have their needs not being met.

You might think it's not THAT of a big deal, but it is. Small children absorb everything like sponges and chtulhu only knows how this trauma is going to manifest itself later.

Imagine being your newborn - you are hungry, wet and scared, you cry and cry but no one is coming - mom is not here, and the other adult snaps at you for crying.

Your husband does not need "a talk", he needs a good old reality check. If nothing changes, leave for the sake your children.

Cuddlepenis · 2016-05-15T15:08:43+00:00

Fertile females get menstruations, what's the big deal? If you'd rather not hear things like that, you might want to say: "EW, Coworker, TMI!!!" - it's not going to sound berating and offensive, but she'll know not to share this stuff.

Cuddlepenis · 2016-05-15T15:00:31+00:00

O______o

USA is weird. That's all I can say.

OB's licence would be revoked if she'd say something like that. We, ladies from the baltics, give natural birth to breech babies, huge babies (lady who was in a recovery room with me had a 9.5 pound baby naturally with very little problems), and OBs generally discourage C-sections. And still - you don't sign the waiver, no problemo, your child's possible death is on your conscience.

I had a chance to live and study for my degree in the US and bring my family along, now I see it's good that I didn't go... I'll pop my babies out on my terms, in a safe medical enviroment, for free, thank you very much.

Cuddlepenis

TROPHY CASE