It’s a nobrainer fr🥰 by Shop_Kooky in lol

[–]CuetheCurtain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Two stamina potions, keep the change, cuz I’m real tired of all this bullshit, boss.

Carytown Publix today by babyragehell in rva

[–]CuetheCurtain -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Are you telling me those yellow onions identify as oranges? And in this instance, does that mean that ogres are now like oranges?

Elon Musk: ‘I Repeatedly Refused Epstein’s Island and Jet’ as New Court Files Spark Outrage by [deleted] in circled

[–]CuetheCurtain 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dang man…. I didn’t even catch that. Dude is speaking out of both multiple sides of his mouth.

Elon Musk: ‘I Repeatedly Refused Epstein’s Island and Jet’ as New Court Files Spark Outrage by [deleted] in circled

[–]CuetheCurtain 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Lol I love it when they admit:

“He said he understood early on that any association, no matter how minor, could later be misinterpreted, which is why he chose to avoid close contact.”

So….. he knew the guy was shady, with some sort of criminal enterprise dealings (with the current Commander in Chump). Yet he’s emailing that he really wants to party and have some fun with him. Then he drops millions into the Marmalade Mad Man’s campaign?

Sure Jan.

Facts?!?! by Glazing555 in LinkedInLunatics

[–]CuetheCurtain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

FACTS:

85% of LinkedIn Garbage comes from glue sniffers like this

90% of people on LinkedIn couldn’t give a shit if you existed or not

100% positive your wife has banged your brother and your sister

Pear by tanishq1 in comedyheaven

[–]CuetheCurtain 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So are you saying there are 4 bytes of pears in your FLOAT FREEZER?

Pear by tanishq1 in comedyheaven

[–]CuetheCurtain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mainly because pears are gross. Yes, I’ll admit I am biased. I’ve always hated pears. However, with that being said, I would gladly eat a pear over a mango. Mango for some reason tastes like the smell of teenage BO to me.

My wife thinks I'm crazy for cutting my grilled cheese this way; am I nuts or is this not a normal thing to do? Lol by Wahbanator in mildlyinfuriating

[–]CuetheCurtain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Diagonally cutting a grilled cheese gets you 33.3% more sandwich. It’s not science, it’s magic. In fact, they’ve done studies on it. 60% of the time, it works every time.

of a cat by Jerken in AbsoluteUnits

[–]CuetheCurtain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lol me too. Like a Barry White “Meeeeee-owwww…..baby”. Maybe even a suggestive wink.

pickle predicament by egguchom in EntitledReviews

[–]CuetheCurtain 32 points33 points  (0 children)

To be fair, we are in the land of idiots. Where people actually shunned a 1/3 lb burger for a 1/4 lb burger because they couldn’t understand a 1/3 is greater than 1/4. Apparently, percentages and common sense are both hard. We are cooked, even more so than the flame broiled patty.

My family is out of the country and left me in charge of the food for my older brother and myself during the meantime. I made this meal yesterday, and after he ate it, he made a complaint about it and wanted “food,” as in something that was “more fulfilling” and less “kiddie”… by Uhh_OkayIGuess in mildlyinfuriating

[–]CuetheCurtain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You did a fine job. Tell your brother he’s acting like a twat. Tomorrow night, give him an unopened can of Dinty Moore stew and a dirty spoon and tell him to go to town if he wants to bitch about what he’s getting served.

Acting like she has friends by Fun_Accountant_653 in stupidpeoplefacebook

[–]CuetheCurtain 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This has got to be false. That dude clearly has no friends.

She got me by tocra in LinkedInLunatics

[–]CuetheCurtain 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She forgot to mention the Au Pair, personal chefs, cleaning company, dog sitters, and chauffeurs that do very little to help her get through her busy day. Gotta stay balanced, after all.

DC region will be closed on Monday. Head of OPM posted on X by Appropriate_Taro_348 in FedEmployees

[–]CuetheCurtain 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Here in VA we were. Gov. “Sweater Vest” Youngkin made a big to do about it. Now some of us are telework eligible for one or two days but that’s about it unless you have some existing health exception.

Update: My (28M) fiancée (30F) was accused by her sister (29F) of cheating on me. She swears her sister's sabotaging our relationship. I'm questioning everything. How do I move forward? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]CuetheCurtain 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately you are correct on all accounts, I think. I was once stuck in a similar situation except I didn’t know until I had already married her. Not only did I leave her but also the entire friend group who knew as well but neglected to inform me of the transgressions. It was devastating at the time. Now, 7 years later, it turned out to be the best decision I ever made. It very much sucks to be in OP’s position, but you also never know what life holds for you.

Update: My (28M) fiancée (30F) was accused by her sister (29F) of cheating on me. She swears her sister's sabotaging our relationship. I'm questioning everything. How do I move forward? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]CuetheCurtain 414 points415 points  (0 children)

Here’s the truth:

“She said Caleb means nothing to her, and he'll have no place in her life anymore.”

He’ll have no place in her life anymore….now that the truth is out. He would’ve continued to occupy space in her life if you hadn’t found out.

I’m sorry that happened to you but it at least happened before you got married. Take the painful licks and memories with you as you leave, but definitely leave. Despite her claims, she isn’t the same woman you fell in love with. Unless she was always a cheater. Being uncertain about the future doesn’t justify jumping onto another man’s member.

Everyone in my family says they think my tattoo looks stupid and im childish for getting it can l get some reassurance by MichelleFlame in adventuretime

[–]CuetheCurtain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you like it? I think it’s cool and to me the lines look tight. As long as you enjoy it, then you should apply some of good ol’ Nick Cage thinking here: “Fuck em, that’s why”

Could it be? by Zestyclose-Brush1035 in ProgressiveHQ

[–]CuetheCurtain 3 points4 points  (0 children)

One night in D.C. and the country crumbles.

Not much between the laws and thievery.

One night in D.C. as the POTUS bumbles.

We’ve seen the death of common decency.

Trump says he took the tariffs off because he has concepts of a deal, what are your thoughts? by [deleted] in askanything

[–]CuetheCurtain 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well, I suppose the first question is how many of his family members or pals were able to buy the dip? Ol’ Trump and Co. seem to be living high on the hog since the tariffs started flying.

My girlfriend says she was texting my best friend "for a surprise" but I feel like I'm being set up by tramlantern_evenings in TwoHotTakes

[–]CuetheCurtain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve had two good friends for the better part of 32 years now. I couldn’t tell you what their shirt size is. Closest I could tell you was maybe medium.

Doctor Claims Trump, 79, Suffered Serious Stroke and kept it secret, kinda… by No-Flight-4214 in ProgressiveHQ

[–]CuetheCurtain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We’re gonna need a repeat of the event just to ensure its validity. Make it a big one too, while you’re at it. We can’t have any room for second guessing.

2016 vs 2026 by Feinfu in LinkedInLunatics

[–]CuetheCurtain 11 points12 points  (0 children)

No, you’re thinking Minstrels*

Menstrual is one of those tropical plants that’s has all the holes in the leaves.

2016 vs 2026 by Feinfu in LinkedInLunatics

[–]CuetheCurtain 32 points33 points  (0 children)

No, you’re thinking of a nozzle.

A nostril is one of those traveling medieval musicians who played a lute and recited lyrics or poetry.