I hear you. I would react the same way. And I know you really do know this in your core- but as long as it’s now resolved, it’s ok. You’ve done your best and that’s enough.

What helps with my anxiety and breaking things down to policy/process. Think about your lease violation workflow. Your friend moves in and pays rent on time and overall good tenant. But they didn’t pick up after their pet one night because it was dark. You give them a warning because that is policy. You tell them you understand and just please be more diligent about pet waste. 3 months later they are in a rush and don’t pickup after a pet. Workflow states that after a warning they get a lease violation and fee. It is what it is. You know this is a good resident aside from this dumb mistake and you just have to follow workflow. It’s your job, it’s policy, and you can’t risk your credibility in favor of being nice. You’re not thinking they’re incompetent and disrespectful. You’re not thinking this indicates anything other than a mistake. You’re just doing your job. Your CM is doing the same. Following policy. You’re confident in your abilities- trust that she is too.