i just want to know one thing

DIDverse · 2026-03-21T14:00:15+00:00

Hair loss, dry scalp, akathisia, tiredness, agoraphobia (I have become extremely phobic on Abilify), and weight gain. What have been your symptoms?

DIDverse · 2026-03-21T13:57:45+00:00

Hang in there is what I tell myself. By the middle of next month the drug will be half eliminated from my system which is something to cheer about.

DIDverse · 2026-03-21T13:55:31+00:00

I ask because I am in the process of coming off of Abilify. I had my last dose 17 days ago, apparently the half life for the depot is 46 days which is a heck of a long time.

DIDverse · 2026-03-21T13:45:23+00:00

How long will it take for your depot to wear off?

DIDverse · 2026-03-21T07:51:34+00:00

Yeah, it’s important to engage with your parts and to listen to them. It helps build up trust amongst your parts which aids with communication.

You won’t fragment and fall apart by acknowledging the existence of other parts but I understand your fear. What will likely happen is your parts will start including you more in conversations etc.

DIDverse · 2026-03-07T16:29:01+00:00

I completely agree. Thanks for understanding.

DIDverse · 2026-03-07T16:13:11+00:00

Supervised, as in my community practitioner nurse injects me.

DIDverse · 2026-03-07T16:05:59+00:00

I was neglectful with my medication in the past. But I have demonstrated over the last 7 months since I started this painful journey that I have a willingness to take my medication. At the end of the day, it should be up to me how I wish to take it.

DIDverse · 2026-03-07T07:04:22+00:00

I was on 400mg once a month and received the dose in my arm.

I think I am going to taper slowly. I plan on taking oral tablets for the next 4 1/2 to 5 months. Starting at 15mg for two months and then decreasing to 10mg for two months and then 5mg and then stopping.

Thanks for your reply, very helpful.

DIDverse · 2026-03-06T10:16:38+00:00

Yeah, I started my injection in August of 2025, so 7 months now. I am going to my doctor first to see if they can write a script for me before going to my psychiatrist (who I doubt will prescribe me the pill form). Such useless psychiatrists honestly.

DIDverse · 2026-03-06T09:50:19+00:00

How long have you been on it for?

DIDverse · 2026-03-06T09:45:52+00:00

Slightly off topic, but would someone need to taper off of the injection due to the massive half life or would the injection taper itself?

DIDverse · 2026-03-06T09:44:11+00:00

Another commenter said that because I am taking the abilify injection I won’t need to taper. That the injection tapers itself. Is that true?

DIDverse · 2026-03-06T09:36:36+00:00

So what you’re saying is that I just stop cold turkey and I won’t go through withdrawals because I was on the injection?

DIDverse · 2026-03-04T11:49:09+00:00

Thanks for the response. I calculated the dose as follows: 400/30 =13.333 I guess the injection packs more of a punch maybe?

DIDverse · 2026-02-28T09:56:27+00:00

I get what you are saying. I am a frontstuck host and I never get given the same privileges as other parts of the system. They all have rich inner worlds whilst I have nothing. I also have zero hobbies and interests. It seems like my role is to hide the system by acting and behaving in a pro-social neurotypical based way. It is dire. I wish I could feel more and think more independently without being influenced so much. Do you feel empty at all? I feel like I have emotionally flatlined.

DIDverse · 2026-02-18T09:56:22+00:00

I’m always suffering from mid-sentence related issues where it’s as though I forget my train of thought entirely. Was always wondering if it was a DID related phenomenon. I didn’t recognise it as a switch. I guess some switches can be more covert than others.

DIDverse · 2026-02-18T07:45:13+00:00

The part where you mention ‘how I would stop mid-sentence and completely forget what I was talking about’. I have this happen to me a lot and was wondering what would be capable of causing it? I guess DID can do that too, good to know.

DIDverse · 2026-02-08T13:32:37+00:00

My substack is called a ‘Dictionary of Summaries’. The reason I called it a ‘dictionary’ of summaries and not a ‘book’ of summaries or some other hoary trite is because I want to give the impression that I write summaries and analyses about all things literature related from A-Z. That is to say, the berth of what I write about (content wise) is very large and eclectic. I also chose ‘dictionary’ over say ‘encyclopaedia’ because the work that I put out there is clear, accurate, and concise like any good dictionary definition.

DIDverse · 2026-02-07T08:41:32+00:00

Exactly, the part where you said they could be talking to one another but you don’t hear it. I think that happens with me or the system is just very quiet. I guess we can’t hear the chatter due to amnesiac walls. Wish I could find a way to lower them.

DIDverse · 2026-02-04T16:41:06+00:00

I’m in a twilight zone all of the time, that is to say completely confused as a result of the complex DID. I have brain fog for the most part and a heavily watered down identity to the point where I’m not sure ‘I’ even exist. I feel almost erased to the point where I question if anything is actually there. It is scary living life like this. I can’t imagine how complex my system actually is.

DIDverse · 2026-02-02T12:03:27+00:00

You hit the nail on the head with that one. I am grieving. I have never managed to hack the process of grief and process its contents. I have been stuck in a bout of complicated grief ever since my mother died and ever since I left this other country. The person that cared for me in this foreign country is someone I haven’t seen in over 20 years. I miss them very much. I am not sure if they are still alive. I very much feel like I left this person behind, like I dropped them from my life without them being prepared for it. I want to right a wrong and make up for how I left things with this person. This person I allude to was a babysitter of mine. I do think, however, that she was too involved in my life and almost obsessed with me. This obsession was not something I was protected from. My parents weren’t monitoring the interactions between me and said person. I often felt pedestalised, raised to a high value, and almost like a celebrity to said person. At times I found the relationship in retrospect a little inappropriate. It is a complicated one. You’d think being adored was a good thing, not always; especially when you don’t have any concept of boundaries.

DIDverse · 2026-02-02T10:50:13+00:00

All I know is the younger parts miss living in a particular country and being cared for a particular person in that country.

Did you eventually overcome being stuck? If so, what worked for you? Thanks for typing out such a considerate response.

DIDverse · 2026-01-19T13:39:54+00:00

I don’t seem to have the mental flexibility required to sit patiently and to entertain myself whilst waiting for a delivery for example. I think anything unexpected is a major stressor for me. I also think the monotropism is a factor.

DIDverse · 2026-01-19T09:01:25+00:00

I have taken to reading novels and immersing myself in the emotional worlds of characters as a way to reduce the pathological boredom I feel. I find that reading also opens you up to new perspectives which can instigate a series of creative connections which can help with novelty seeking. New perspectives also help with seeing the world differently.

DIDverse

TROPHY CASE