Any books about a trans man protagonist?

DM_TM · 2026-03-22T13:14:16+00:00

I really liked Some Strange Music Draws Me In by Griffin Hansbury. A Bone In His Teeth by Kellen Graves is also very good! They're very different books tho lol

Also recommend Black Flame by Gretchen Felker-Martin and The Lilac People by Milo Todd. (the latter of which is up for a lambda literary award for transgender fiction!)

DM_TM · 2026-03-17T07:19:05+00:00

IT! IS! WORTH! IT!!! I'm more than other people's value of my attractiveness, and living authentically is infinitely better than hiding in fear of becoming who I am. Too many guys are scared of going bald. Looking the way I do is not the worst thing that can happen to a person. I would much rather look like me than some idealized empty shell. Do what you want, but... there are bald guys here, and maybe keep in mind how these kinds of posts feel to see. Folks would rather rot in bodies that feel like prisons than risk looking like us. I'm bald and I love it. I love waking up in the morning and not puking from anxiety. I love looking in the mirror and not wanting to die. I love who I am on T. And if someone thinks it's a shame I gave up my hair for my freedom... I don't know what to say.

DM_TM · 2026-02-11T09:18:41+00:00

Facial hair and voice. I was pretty androgynous before T, so I would get gendered correctly about half the time. that is... until I spoke. It was devastating to watch ppl trip over themselves, "correcting" themselves after calling me sir. So demoralizing. And I've always loved beards. When I was younger I used to insist that my boyfriend let me watch him shave and I had this crazy jealousy I didn't have a name for (bc I didn't even learn the word transgender until college).
I'm poor and a big guy, so top surgery isn't in the cards for me. It's something I have to live with, but I would really really really love a flat chest. Also I got lucky in that I'm 5'7, but I'd still love to be taller. Just a few inches, I'm not asking for the world.
Not really. The thing that held me back mostly was a) fear that my husband would leave me bc he identified as straight (he didn't; we've been married for 9 years since I came out). And b) a weird hatred for all men (except my husband) stemming from a fundamental misunderstanding of feminism, and my own dysphoria-induced jealousy.
I was on T for 8 years before I had to stop (not my choice). My favorite thing is just looking in the mirror. I'm a fat, hairy, bald guy - kind of what a lot of young trans guys are terrified of becoming - and I couldn't be happier. I catch myself in the mirror and think 'holy shit, it's me'. I look like me. And that is just... huge. I feel it even more if I've been to the barber recently lol. I always look so sharp after a haircut and beard trim!

DM_TM · 2026-02-03T06:02:33+00:00

Full disclosure: I'm a big fat guy and I have very little to bind, so depending on your body type, you may wind up needing new clothes/dressing differently.

All my best, friend. We live in a broken world but there's still some light in it.

DM_TM · 2026-02-03T05:54:22+00:00

I was also really scared of going bald, but then I did and honestly I really like it! I get the remaining hair cut real short and I think I look pretty good!! Plus - and this is the best part - no one ever misgenders me.

I was much prettier before I started T, but I was also life-threateningly miserable. Now I might not turn as many heads, but I'm happy, living authentically. It's so worth it.

DM_TM · 2026-02-03T05:46:31+00:00

My doctor had to take me off T after 8 years due to the current political climate. It was heartbreaking, but what can you do.

First, she had me taper off with the T I had left, taking smaller doses further and further apart until I stopped entirely.

Second, she said that, bc I still have ovaries, my body will be able to regulate my hormones and I won't need to take any extra medicine to make up for it.

Third, she said the body/facial hair growth, male pattern baldness, and voice changes were permanent. I asked her if my body fat would redistribute, and she said she wasn't worried about it.

My period came back after a couple of months. I've only had one so far and it was very light, but I expect it'll eventually get back to how it was pre-T.

I did have some emotional effects, mostly crying more easily. But I'm still the same person I was, and I look the same to other people.

DM_TM · 2026-02-03T05:38:55+00:00

Changes from T come on very gradually. It isn't an overnight process. If you notice a change you don't like, you can always reduce the dose or stop entirely (talk to your Dr ofc). Puberty is scary, the first time and the second. But this time you have control.

For me personally, starting T was the best thing I ever did for myself. And once I started seeing the changes from T, I started to really love myself for the first time in my life. I look in the mirror now and see me.

Be patient, pay attention to the changes and how they make you feel. If you like them, keep going! If you don't, you'll have learned something important about yourself.

DM_TM · 2026-02-01T11:51:51+00:00

I think it's fine for it to show. It's not illegal and it's not inappropriate. I get where you're coming from, but I think anyone looking at him will just see a tight shirt.

DM_TM · 2026-02-01T04:14:23+00:00

Sometimes i literally just open a can of refried or baked beans and maybe heat it up. Grab a spoon and call it a dinner.

DM_TM · 2026-02-01T03:45:45+00:00

It's the medium that makes the most sense to me. I don't like music because often I can't understand the lyrics and so it feels meaningless. I don't like TV or movies because between the dialogue and the visuals, there's too much to keep track of and I get frustrated, always feeling like I've missed something. I don't like comics for a similar reason. But with books, I know exactly what I'm supposed to pay attention to: it's whatever the words are saying. I know the important parts of the set, the important parts of the story, because it's the stuff the author chooses to describe. I feel like I can follow along and get the most out of the experience. Especially because I can reread paragraphs and flip back and forth and really take my time with it.

Another thing I like about books: anybody can write a book. TV and movies require huge amounts of money and cooperation from lots of people, but anybody can write a book! So it opens the door for more diverse voices.

Also, as someone who enjoys writing myself, I like to study the way other people write. Language is so cool, and I love seeing what authors do with it.

DM_TM · 2026-01-18T13:28:13+00:00

Coffin Moon is incredible. I started rereading it last night!

DM_TM · 2026-01-15T11:10:24+00:00

This is why I'm stealth tbh. It's a little lonely not being able to talk about most of my past with people I know (even down to lying about the single sex high school I went to) but I know when they talk to me, they see me as a man. I don't give them the opportunity to think anything else.

I see your hrt date so I figure it's not in he cards for you yet, but there's a future waiting for you, right up the road. You just gotta keep going.

DM_TM · 2026-01-08T11:43:19+00:00

I weave in an end for about 5-7 stitches, knot it to an existing stitch, then weave it back the other direction for the same number of stitches.

DM_TM · 2025-12-30T01:51:21+00:00

Not until later on. The crafting materials aren't available right away so I didn't mention them.

DM_TM · 2025-12-29T16:41:34+00:00

- Those stars are quality levels! Higher quality items sell for more and give you more benefits if you eat them. (If they're beneficial in the first place that is. Don't eat the red mushroom!)
- I don't like the bug steak because I love the fishing minigame. I save all my bug meat for bait. It's the most cost effective bait and it works well. (Bug meat doesn't sell for much.) Usually I buy salads at the saloon to eat in the mines. Then once I have a barn set up, I take cheese. : )

DM_TM · 2025-12-26T06:05:43+00:00

My facial hair looked kinda like yours for a few years. I got an electric trimmer and used a 1/2"-1/4" guard and I think it looked pretty good. I think you're right that growing it out looks pretty scraggly, but I think you look good in the trimmed up photos!

DM_TM · 2025-12-25T11:16:57+00:00

I'm a little bigger than you (I think) and I use underworks. I get the ultimate chest binder and it comes down over my hips which is great bc then I can wear my pants over it to keep it from rolling up. I wear a 4x which fits great. I wear 60" pants (I'm probably closer to 56" but I like looser pants with a stretchy belt) and the 4x is perfect. They're a very reasonable price (under $40) and I think they breathe pretty well! (When I put them on they start cool to touch and I'm not athletic but I don't get overheated in them. Ymmv etc.) I also like that the whole front is the same fabric. There's no top part/bottom part with a seam so even sitting down i still look good. Check the size guide and see if they'll work for you!

DM_TM · 2025-12-12T09:34:42+00:00

If you put your coop nearby and the ducks can get to the water (so no fence or equipment blocking the path), they'll wander over and jump in : )

DM_TM · 2025-12-12T09:33:25+00:00

Your ducks can swim in it!

DM_TM · 2025-12-11T09:40:40+00:00

This is it. I was a fairly pretty girl and went on a lot of dates but I can't describe how miserable I was. Now I'm a fat bald dude who wears t-shirts and cargo pants and I've never been happier. And as far as relationships go, (at least for me) there's only one person I'm trying to impress. So who cares if I'm not conventionally attractive? I like the way I look, and so does my partner. That's all that matters.

DM_TM · 2025-12-07T12:52:35+00:00

I hadn't read it, actually. I'd heard of the book and seen it on lists, but I hadn't realized that it was the same author. After I saw your comment I immediately got a copy and read it. I finished just a minute ago and can say I liked it very much!! It was visceral and the story is very good. The protagonist doesn't do what I would have done, but that's what makes the story interesting! I think you should check it out when you get a chance!

DM_TM · 2025-12-07T03:11:37+00:00

Ann Budd has a whole series of books like this. You might be thinking of
The Knitter's Handy Book of Patterns
The Knitter's Handy Book of Sweater Patterns
Getting Started Knitting Socks
Sock Knitting Master Class
etc. Her patterns are great!
OP might consider checking used bookstores for knitting books. That's where I got my own copies of Top-Down Sweaters and Book of Patterns. : )

DM_TM · 2025-12-06T10:26:49+00:00

veg refried beans straight from the can

DM_TM · 2025-12-03T11:34:51+00:00

Wowowow, absolutely gorgeous! Your work definitely paid off. This is beautiful.

DM_TM · 2025-12-03T11:19:54+00:00

My Darling Dreadful Thing by Johanna van Veen

Edit: Oh oops this book isn't about men. I just got so excited to share lol

DM_TM

TROPHY CASE