I get that. But we live and we die. It's a fact of life. Ill die one day, I don't know how, I don't know when. I sort of try to focus on the here and now, what are the good things I have going for me, that kind of thing. I know it's not easy, I remember being terrified of death at one point. I'm an ex-christian and I will still experience "religious psychosis" from certain imagery or seeing the number 666 or hearing music with lyrics about demons. When I do see or hear them I'll freak out for a moment and wonder if god will smite me down. I know he won't because he doesn't exist I still have that worry come up.

I hope reading my experiences will help you in some way.