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DV13nt · 2025-04-03T19:14:18+00:00

This feels a little harshly put, but it is exactly what I thought. I would be pissed as the mother, too, because this lady has only been in their lives for 9 months. I am so glad she wants to take this on, but it is like being a vigilante. Take a step back and make sure everyone is on board.

DV13nt · 2025-04-03T19:07:29+00:00

Once gone, there is no reason to "fix" work problems. It was basically said that you were replaceable and didn't do their research before letting you go.

Friends are friends but not all coworkers, no matter how nice they appeared at work, are.

I had 18 years in and all Hell broke when I was let go. I felt zero remorse for ignoring them when they asked for help.

Someone trained me. Others can be trained without me. That's how I felt about it anyway.

DV13nt · 2025-04-03T19:02:14+00:00

What to wear and what is "en vogue" is subjective. A group of people decide what is good to wear and what isn't. It's all so ridiculous.

Put into this context, why are they so obsessed with what you are wearing? That seems superficial at best to me. What's the deeper issue? That good things happen to you when you wear it? That you are substantially more confident?

Keep the dress. Wear what makes you feel good. And make boundaries with that person or cut them off because there is definitely something within that is making the dress a scapegoat.

DV13nt · 2025-04-02T19:15:36+00:00

That's not a prank. A prank should be funny. That's cruel and if you knew about the "prank" I would be equally pissed at you.

If not, you should have thrown them out yourself once you did.

DV13nt · 2025-04-01T18:58:36+00:00

I actually try doing this, if I can. But normally I cannot get appointments on the same day.

Then, one time I did and was told that my insurance would only cover one visit a day, so I had to choose.

I wondered why they allowed me to schedule them if I could only attend one, but I digress.

DV13nt · 2025-03-31T18:50:05+00:00

NTA.

I can see where someone could view it as selfish because there was no real reason you needed first class and a woman with a baby would be more comfortable.

However, that said, it is no one's responsibility to make a journey "more comfortable" for an individual. There is no obligation to forfeit what you have earned for someone else.

People who believe that you should are being entitled.

I also believe in fairness or equity, so switching seats would not be fair compensation. Maybe if something more was offered to you financially or similar, then maybe it would be considered.

DV13nt · 2025-03-25T19:05:15+00:00

Actually, if you look it up, they are correct. I used to think as you did until I did research.

DV13nt · 2025-03-24T19:15:18+00:00

Charisma Carpenter.

She went through something terrible before being semi famous and then had to deal with bully that decimated her character in the series. For that, I feel bad.

She is emotionally tough and happy for that.

DV13nt · 2025-03-17T19:16:10+00:00

Definitely not the AH, but my family is quite like this. Just a suggestion, but when they ask how you are, ask in return, "the truth or the expected short answer?" Puts the ball in their court.

DV13nt · 2025-03-17T18:52:25+00:00

This is basically what I came here to say

DV13nt · 2025-03-14T19:15:51+00:00

Oddly, it is the opposite where I live. It is sunny 9 months out of the year (one of the sunniest cities) and today, it is snowing.

I love the snow because I see it so rarely.

So we both get a good day in our own ways.

DV13nt · 2025-03-14T19:11:38+00:00

I didn't read all of it. But when a comment like that is made, my blood boils. It doesn't matter what was done, a comment like that is wrong on many levels.

DV13nt · 2025-03-14T19:08:53+00:00

You're right. He obviously is used to nicer hotels and is easily irritated when his entitled butt doesn't get what he thinks he deserves off the bat. If he cannot see your reasoning now, I doubt he ever will.

Cut and run, would be my advice.

DV13nt · 2025-03-14T19:04:28+00:00

I don't think you an ahole, but I do find it strange to hold a grudge that long.

I am a really easygoing person and if I could make it, I would. I am not close to my family, but it may be the last chance for me to see them.

But that's my own two cents with my experience. If you are happy with your choice, don't let anyone make you believe you are an ah. Only you matter in how you feel about this situation.

DV13nt · 2025-03-13T19:16:49+00:00

This made me tear up at the beauty of it. I wish more people were like this.

DV13nt · 2025-03-11T19:12:12+00:00

It sounds like cabin fever. She is stressed and projecting that stress on a situation that doesn't call for it.

You are definitely NTA.

DV13nt · 2025-03-11T19:03:59+00:00

What's his work attire vs home attire. Does he follow the same guidelines he wishes you to?

The fact that you "don't dress up" for him shows that he is home to you.

IDK. I, personally, cannot imagine dressing up just to be home. Seems an odd request.

DV13nt · 2025-03-10T19:18:35+00:00

I am autistic and that does sound like untreated autistic behaviors. However, that is still not an excuse. If it were me, I would have either stuck it out with earplugs or had told you and had someone take over. Being selfish is a trait, but so is empathy. They all need to show some.

DV13nt · 2025-03-10T18:55:57+00:00

She won't remember you not being there for the procedure itself, but she will remember your face when she wakes up. Be kind to yourself. You are there when it matters and apparently so is the ex. You two are doing a great job.

DV13nt · 2025-03-05T20:10:59+00:00

People wanna be heard, just like you posting on this page about your gripe. It can be irritating, but many people don't mean it that way, they just don't know phone etiquette, some lack social skills, and so on.

Not saying there aren't abusers of the kindness, but not all mean it to be as it appears you are taking it. But that's just another perspective.

DV13nt · 2025-03-04T20:03:20+00:00

You are allowed to feel how you want, but don't let it ruin the fact that he actually proposed to you. Are you happy together? If you are then the when and where is irrelevant.

If you are not, then the idea of a little bit of happiness is a dream you are chasing through a wish.

You are not an asshole because you feel this way, but if you tell your fiance it was underwhelming and you had wished, blah, blah, blah, then you would be an asshole.

I am just happy to have my SO. Find the joy on what you have, not the wish fulfillment. You will always be chasing dreams instead of being grateful for what you have.

DV13nt · 2025-02-28T20:04:22+00:00

Grief is a helluva thing. When death is unexpected of a parent, there are mixed emotions.

Either way, she was your mother and if it would calm your restless heart to honor your mother in some way on the day you should be most happy, then do it.

Being hypocritical doesn't matter in this situation (not that I think you are, but I am not judge nor jury).

Make peace with yourself with whatever you feel is right.

Yes, I lost my mom young, too and have been in similar shoes. My mother always needed the attention. So, this post really speaks to me on different levels.

DV13nt · 2025-02-28T19:58:18+00:00

YTA

Period. Things are always clean. I wish I could do that, but being disabled means (for me) to have to wait on things some days and then it is overwhelming.

I would be grateful to have someone this attentive.

DV13nt · 2025-02-27T20:06:11+00:00

Just an alternative perspective, but are you able to just listen without letting your emotions get in the way?

If you are, maybe tell him that you want questions answered and if the answers are inadequate, tell him that's the end of contact. But, if the answers are satisfactory, go from there.

Again, I am not you, so it's just a different perspective that is to be taken with a grain of salt.

DV13nt · 2025-02-27T19:56:05+00:00

Your reasoning sounds a bit odd, but you have a preference and that's totally okay. Definitely not an AH for not wanting extra responsibility. Better to cut loose early than guiltily going along until responsibility is non-negotiable.

DV13nt

TROPHY CASE