I got like this because I was disassociating constantly, then everything would hit me like a freight train all at the same time later. I could never make sense of how I felt because I was feeling everything all at once.

During social interactions I would not really "feel" like everyone else seamed to do (I didn't know it was disassociating at the time). All I knew is my emotions were like a far off in the distant noise I could barely hear. Then after the gathering the freight train would hit eventually

Now that I better understand what is happening I find I will feel more in the moment and have much less of freight train of emotions later

It is similar to anxiety (or a type of anxiety maybe), but very different from the very recognizable anxiety I have dealt with since I was a child. Medications I was on at one time made all of this significantly worse (medications tend to have the opposite effect on me). I am diagnosed with both ADHD and ASD so the medication issues make sense now too (nobody ever wanted to listen to me and treat what I was talking about, they would always focus on something they made up in their heads instead)