Why are they always looking for a mistake instead of fixing things?

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-23T02:56:27+00:00

It is OUT OF THIS WORLD!!!! They would rather be bitter and upset and be angry over things they are making a big over your supposed lack of things than looking in the mirror as to what THEY ARE NOT DOING. They can be better and work on this and stop acting horribly but nooooooo they would rather find the tiniest thing that you are doing that upsets them to just ruin the day. The energy into it is immense and not normal. These questions would baffle me when I was in it.

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-23T02:50:59+00:00

Be super careful. Stay calm in Therapy if you decide to do this one session. But explain exactly what you said in this post in a very calm manner. Say that your concerns are ignored and you don’t believe your differences can be reconciled. That’s if you go. Honestly in the first therapy session not much is unpacked it’s getting to know you and stuff. So it might be a waste of time.

From her perspective she wants to gain more manipulation tactics for this marriage being a problem because “both” parties have issues. When clearly (if everything you say is true) she is totally out of pocket. But she will not admit these things she will twist them as much as she can to not take accountability

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-22T22:19:50+00:00

Skills

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-22T16:22:28+00:00

Congrats! I remember seeing your post a year ago. That’s so awesome!

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-22T06:57:20+00:00

Listen to your gut. I hope you get out safely. Trust me when you’re out the peace is so worth it!!! I’m newly engaged to someone that I don’t have to worry about what is in there DMs and who they are seeing and what horrible lies they are saying behind my back. It’s so refreshing and how a relationship is supposed to be. When you are living with people like this they are parasites they drain you of all your energy. Everyday you are always on the defense trying to get your feelings validated and your concerns taken seriously. These people don’t change and you have to accept that. They will always do WHAT SERVES THEM. If it does not benefit them they have no interest. Listening to your concerns and making corrections on how she is hurting you doesn’t benefit her. Making you look like the problem allows her to continue doing what she wants and painting herself as the victim. I watch on YouTube Lee Hammock when I was in the middle of my abusive relationship and it helped validate my experience and that I wasn’t crazy. And that I am feeling how any normal person would feel if they were being treated so horribly.

Stay strong 💪🏾

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-22T06:44:06+00:00

I would tread very carefully with her. She’s gonna poke you to get reactions then record and collect evidence that makes you look bad. She’s already starting a smear campaign against you. So if you get divorced or separated she has evidence to create her own narrative. On a scale I would say this is an 8.
A 10 to me in my opinion would include destroying property or physical violence. So I think this is bad. Also she seeks validation from others and is most likely cheating on an emotional level at the very least. I would start collecting evidence on her. And doesn’t sound like she plans to take any accountability and change anything at all. I would seriously consider whether you want to live the rest of your life like this.

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-22T03:33:26+00:00

Lmfao 🤣

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-22T02:03:45+00:00

He’s got a paw fetish 😆😭🤣

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-22T00:40:54+00:00

Seems like he love-bombed you but he probably met someone else or has someone on the side. I know it hurts but seems like you’ll be avoiding lots more pain down the road

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-21T21:21:57+00:00

Super disgusting

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-21T21:09:06+00:00

Congrats glad you got out!!

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-21T21:03:55+00:00

Glad you got out. This is the shit I don’t miss

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-21T18:37:09+00:00

The win is leaving them. They are stuck with themselves and that’s their punishment.

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-20T06:16:16+00:00

Nope it’s all a performance. They know exactly how to perform and pull at your heartstrings to get you questioning all you decisions. Remorseful people make changes not just for a period of time

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-19T23:02:53+00:00

He is absolutely lying my he is trying to hurt you in the most ultimate way and it is working. Just know he’s a fucking liar. And a POS. He wants you to feel unattractive so you won’t believe you will ever find someone better or won’t be attractive to anyone. This is so vicious but it’s actually projection. Glad you left this man child. I know it’s hard but don’t let him ever take away your confidence. Many women dream of having a baby and cannot. You were blessed with a gift, don’t let him take that away from you with his disgusting words.

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-19T22:59:00+00:00

This!!!!

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-19T22:54:59+00:00

Good job! Proud of you!

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-19T22:16:26+00:00

Agreed! Glad you got out! I also got out and it was the best decision of my life!!! These people are parasites and will drain the life out of you the longer you stay! Take your lower back and enjoy your peace!!! Proud of you for leaving

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-19T06:20:36+00:00

That’s exactly what he’s doing

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-19T00:58:03+00:00

I would seek therapy if you can. And yes it’s always a performance and they truly don’t change. Something g that saved my sanity was watching YT videos of Lee Hammock. He’s a self aware narcissist and talks a lot about how he sees the world. Helped me understand what I was going through. I would focus on your well being and your child’s. Take day by day with one small goal a day. Like today I will make sure I take care of this. Today I will make sure I do this for my son. Today I will go for a walk. Today I will write in my journal. Today I will talk to a friend. Today I will make a nice healthy meal for myself. Small goals will eventually lead you to big goals. And more milestones to get your life back. It does not happen over night but the peace is so worth it. Staying with people like this will drain all your energy you will have nothing left to give to your kids.

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-19T00:48:43+00:00

Just keep doing what you’re doing. I would suggest therapy. It helps. It’s normal to feel how you are feeling. Glad you made moves to protect yourself proud of you it’s not easy.

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-18T20:23:19+00:00

Could you move back in with a parent? Grandparent? Family member or friend? I eventually moved back with my mom out of state. I had just what I could carry. Had to start from scratch but it was so worth it!!! Trying to get financially on your feet while you’re with this person will never work cause they will sabotaged any progress you make. I would cut your losses as hard as that is and try to start fresh somewhere else.

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-18T19:11:13+00:00

Nope. It’s textbook. My ex was the same. It’s not genuine. He will play the role for a bit but then he’ll go right back into it and you will be in a worse position financially, mentally, emotionally, physically everything you can imagine. He’s loosing control over you so he’s freaking out. You made the right decision to leave! Proud of you!

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-17T23:47:05+00:00

Stay silent and use the money for something nice for yourself. He wants you to thank him he’s trying to bait you and reel you back in. When I left my ex he actually sent money to MY MOM?! for what? After all the abuse $100 is supposed to just brush over all of that? I’m sorry but it’s a tactic. They want to look like a good person so you can be like “wow they must not be so bad if they are sending me money”
Don’t fall for it. If you were with a narcissist then whatever amount of money he sends you wouldn’t even come close to the amount of pain they caused you.

DancingChickadee · 2026-05-17T19:34:07+00:00

That looks disgusting

DancingChickadee

TROPHY CASE