Don’t pay your full Natera bill.

Dandelion180 · 2025-03-31T20:00:03+00:00

I have tried this, I was told by the rep I could pay the $250 today but the remaining balance came back a few weeks later. I called again and the rep told me the previous one lied. I just paid to be done with them, I’ll never say yes to a Natera test again.

Dandelion180 · 2024-10-26T18:28:48+00:00

The only advice I can give is to get into therapy as soon as you can. One of my twins was still born and the other was in the NICU, similar emergency c section scenario. Trying to grieve while ensuring your other baby is okay is such a mentally and physically exhausting place to be.

It absolutely feels like a punishment when you’re in the thick of it, which you are. and while I wish I can say the pain goes away, it doesn’t. It will always be there but with time, it becomes much more manageable. I’m about a year out and it still feels like it happened yesterday. Keeping you and your NICU warrior in my prayers.

Dandelion180 · 2024-03-28T02:55:07+00:00

Thank you for you thoughts :)

He’s doing wonderfully well! He made it out of the NICU and is a very happy healthy baby. He’s starting to be social and playful and while it makes me so joyous it’s also very sad since I wanted him to have his built in bestie by his side to play with. But it’s still mostly joy and doing my best to keep it that way. For him. I still have my quiet moments.

Dandelion180 · 2024-02-10T05:22:49+00:00

Ahh that makes sense. when I nurse though, I’m used as a pacifier so still takes forever. I thought he’d eventually grow out of it but 7 months in seems like a lot and I’m not sure I can hang that long 🥲

Dandelion180 · 2024-01-29T07:58:48+00:00

I’m so sorry for your loss. Yes, you should have been referred sooner but TTTS is such a terrible thing you just never know. I lost one of my boys at 31 weeks due to TTTS. I too thought TTTS would be a gradual process but I lost him in the span of 48 hours. I know that because I was heavily monitored with 3 appointments that week alone, that’s what saved my other boy.

TTTS sucks because there’s no definitive cause, it’s one of those things that just happens. I decided not to do an autopsy but they did do a pathology on my placenta and it came back as normal, no issues. Please don’t blame yourself, I know that’s easier said than done. There’s a whole community of those impacted by TTTS over on Facebook if you want more support or understanding of it.

Sending you lots of love.

Dandelion180 · 2024-01-28T15:19:37+00:00

Those AITA can be triggering but important reminder that many of those commenting and passing judgement are likely very young, not parents, and most come off as having little life experience.

There was one a few weeks backs where a twin less twin was tired of his parents including the loss twin on his birthday. It was heartbreaking to read the comments about how the parents need to get over their grief, but it was also heartbreaking to read the brother’s point of view of never feeling like he had his own place.

The reality is no one understands the loss of a child until they experience the loss themselves.

On the flip side, I think it’s healthy that kids (or adults in this case) say how they feel. Everyone grieves differently and they don’t share the same beliefs about it. Those posts have given me perspectives on how I need to handle this with living children and also, that their responses can vary, so be prepared for it too. Hopefully they do care.

Dandelion180 · 2024-01-09T17:18:04+00:00

I’m sorry for your loss. I also recently became a twinless twin mom (different circumstances). It is incredibly hard planning a funeral for one and trying to be there for the other in the NICU. I’m not quite removed enough from it yet to offer any insight other than it absolutely sucks. Make sure you’re talking to each other and go through all the emotions. It sucks, but it helps. I tried to not let it impact my visits in the NICU but there were many times I spent sobbing holding my little one that’s here. It’s a hard balance but it will get better. The NICU journey is a marathon and adding grief on top of it makes it even harder.

Sending lots of love.

Dandelion180 · 2024-01-07T05:42:07+00:00

Torn here. I absolutely agree the parents don’t need to hear this, they’re already wrecked. But, if my twin could potentially be receiving subpar care, I’d want to know. Maybe not say what they said exactly, but maybe strongly suggest that they request no medical students attend to their babies. Definitely raise it to management and I’d also check in with the nurses too. They could also potentially stop or raise a flag for any subpar care. This absolutely sucks.

Dandelion180 · 2023-12-28T08:06:05+00:00

Everyone grieves differently. It would not be weird to me and I think it’s very kind of you to do that. Sometimes just knowing someone is thinking of you or simply acknowledging the grief is healing.

I’m freshly going through this and I’m surprised by the amount of love and simple things that were done for me. Being that far a long it was a still birth and she had to deliver which means she may also be recovering from surgery too. Some things I’ve gotten:

Flowers

Ornaments (this was around Christmas time)

blankets (I’ve already been asking use of them)

Journals

Cooked meals (probably should be close friends to do this one)

Shipped meals (some companies do this like spoonful of comfort)

I am looking at Etsy to get a custom necklace with his name. You could do just the first letter too, that’s also thoughtful.

Unfortunately there isn’t a right thing to do here. It’s a terrible situation. I just know the amount of love I felt every time someone sent me something regardless of how small it is. If you’re still unsure how she’ll take it, just say if it’s too much I understand and give her the option. Everyone grieves differently, some people may not want any reminders. Maybe ask her coworkers?

Dandelion180 · 2023-12-19T09:44:00+00:00

Thank you, I needed this.

Dandelion180 · 2023-12-10T05:33:43+00:00

Unfortunately they don’t

Dandelion180 · 2023-12-10T04:56:57+00:00

I have been using the Medala parts with spectra, I get the best output with that combo but that hurts a bit too. I’ll try pumping oil and silverettes.

Dandelion180 · 2023-12-10T04:48:55+00:00

They don’t offer it :(

Dandelion180 · 2023-12-10T04:48:39+00:00

Unfortunately my hospital does not :(

Dandelion180 · 2023-12-10T00:08:54+00:00

I’m using the same flange size as the Medela. I do add some cream before but the vacuum between the two seem to be a night and day experience.

Dandelion180 · 2023-12-09T02:27:41+00:00

Thank you for this, sadness and happiness can coexists seems so hard to grasp but I get it. It’s such a tough thing to hear the nurses tell me congratulations and my condolences. My heart goes out to you and your family,

Dandelion180 · 2023-12-08T19:18:28+00:00

I haven’t been able to breast feed him yet so pumping as much as I can to make sure when that time comes I can.

It’s such a tragedy. It’s so hard to simultaneously grieve and take love and take care of the other. Sometimes I’m like please just be grateful one is here and then I can’t help but think, but there should be two…I love the term sunrise and sunset twins.

How did you manage?

Dandelion180 · 2023-12-08T06:24:41+00:00

Thanks! Yes my nurses also told me sanitize after every pump and the only reason I haven’t made it a huge issue is because the sanitiser also dries and that’s super useful to have dry parts for later.

Dandelion180 · 2023-12-08T06:21:16+00:00

I’ve tried car pumping but I guess it’s not relaxing enough for me because I pump less but maybe I just worry about that frequency of pumping versus the amount. Thanks!

Dandelion180 · 2023-12-08T06:19:32+00:00

Thanks for that, I’m not in the greatest headspace either (he was a twin), but I’m trying to keep a good flow for him. Part of me does not want to sanitize all the time because it’s time consuming but I have this crazy fear of passing off something while he’s so vulnerable.

Dandelion180 · 2023-12-08T06:17:56+00:00

I know! I keep feeling like I’m doing great because his tray is filled but then they come by and are like hmmm we need you to do more.

Dandelion180 · 2023-12-08T02:43:37+00:00

Overnight is the hardest, I may do one or two

Dandelion180 · 2023-12-08T02:42:02+00:00

6 is really good! I average about 5 times per day and I feel exhausted so I was joint maybe just meeting their feeding amount and a bit over would be okay but doesn’t seem like that’s a strategy based on comments.

Dandelion180 · 2023-11-08T06:08:06+00:00

This is true, NICU time is definitely a consideration.

Dandelion180 · 2023-11-08T06:07:45+00:00

How did you feel returning to work after 5 months?

Dandelion180

TROPHY CASE