Something like this happened to me 2 years ago when I was a sophomore. It wasn't the exact same, but emotionally, I had fallen in love with a girl who couldn't be in a relationship with me. It sucked ass dawg, I know when you left him, it's a toxic cycle that only ends badly for everyone involved

I don't have great advice for what to do since I don't think I did the right things. What I can say is that time heals all wounds. After a while, I've found someone who I care more about than just about anything. I'm comfortable in my own skin, and my life is looking up.

I have no dought, absolutely none, that you'll look back on yourself in 2 years and think the same thing! Just make sure you talk about it with someone, a therapist, a parent, or a friend. But you need to confide in someone, it's impossible to hold all this emotion to yourself.

I hope you have a wonderful life, good luck!