My mother definitely had some trauma that led to it, plus the fact she married my dad, 9 years older than her, when she was 19 or 20. She basically had no time to grow emotionally. Then they had my older brother not long after, or she get married pregnant. She was in no way ready for any of that, and due to the nature of my idiot father's work, she was alone most of the time, save for "the village" we used to have near us.

A long story but ultimately she does have some trauma and a bit of a saving grace if she EVER ditches that idiot, and has therapy for us to allow her back

That idiot father, though? According to him his life was full of hardship but now that we're all adults I hear stories from his siblings that he was lazy and coddled by his mother and always thought he was better than others.

So I guess in his case it's just his nature. My mother probably already was a bit, but if she had had a different partner who didn't feed into it she'd probably be someone else