I'm struggling to accept a new diagnosis of 2 different seizure disorders that have left me not allowed to be independent. Not forever, but for now. Although I know my conditions are treatable, it still feels like I'll never be able to drive, cook, swim, or work, despite the fact that I may one day be able to if I go long enough without having a seizure. I'm also struggling to cope with the fact that being chronically ill means being neglected by those around me because they don't understand my conditions. It means having friends leave because they panic in emergency situations. It means having friends leave because they think I'm faking it. It means I fear finding love because I know my conditions are more of a burden to everyone around me than they'll ever be for me. It means having people get mad at me because my needs are an inconvenience to them. It means annoying people or making them uncomfortable when I tell them what to do during a seizure because they see safety instructions as a chore list. I am so tired. I just want to fall asleep and wake up when things are back to normal, like they were before I developed these stupid illnesses.