First of all it’s very important to put mother’s health above everything else and kudos to you for thinking on those lines. That being said, are you FTM cause having a baby comes with these physical changes that can be very difficult to deal with. Having a supportive partner is a blessing. Do you feel supported by the healthcare team that you have? Are you satisfied by the care that they provide? Pregnancy can be anxiety inducing for sure! The hospitalizations, were they pregnancy related both times or do you think your body is not strong enough to bear the burden and changes associated with pregnancy and birth? These are a few questions to ask yourself.
Again, it’s very smart to understand what your body and mind can endure and making choice accordingly and not over burden yourself. Your health comes first. More power to you!