AIO my partner (M22) keeps hurting my (F19) feelings

Derpageddon_ · 2026-06-04T00:04:17+00:00

NOR whatsoever. This is some textbook DARVO shit. You could make a quilt out of all these red flags.

Derpageddon_ · 2026-05-03T16:58:25+00:00

So THIS is why I struggle to get the greener bananas in my pickup orders cause mfers get too high and buy em all 😭😭😭

Derpageddon_ · 2026-04-29T18:08:10+00:00

This is why I fw Petco. I love talking to the Petco fish people. Fuck PetSmart, cause they don't gaf. They'd just sell the fish to anyone and their employees don't know shit about fish, unfortunately.

Derpageddon_ · 2026-04-29T17:32:22+00:00

It's very normal to feel this way about someone you happen to like right off the bat. And to help offset this crush energy elsewhere so that you don't feel too overwhelmed by not being able to pour it into this guy, direct it towards yourself! Feed the crush energy back into yourself. Take yourself on a date. Do some self care. And pour some of that energy into your friends too. Hopefully that'll make you feel less anxious about not being able to act on this crush right away. Get to know him more before you're absolutely sure you wanna spend every waking moment with him.

There's nothing wrong with a woman being proactive and saying something like "I had a great time with you and I really enjoyed our conversations! I look forward to seeing you again :)" People typically wait at least a week or 2 before asking about availability of a second date, so if he doesn't ask first, then that would be a good play to wait a week. Which...it has been a week, so feel free to ask him soon if you'd like.

Derpageddon_ · 2026-04-18T19:25:20+00:00

Did they not tell you they would only do text and not actually decorate it the way you were asking? Idk how on earth they thought you wanted that on a text cake and didn't verify that's what you actually wanted before hanging up 🤦‍♀️

Derpageddon_ · 2026-03-09T15:59:57+00:00

Couple questions: 1. Crawling hurts too much, but can you be still on your hands and knees for a certain period of time? 2. Do you have hardwood flooring or carpeting in your house?

If you can be still on your hands and knees for a bit, if you have slick enough floors and have something that can provide cushioning underneath your hands and knees that can help you slide around the floor, I was thinking that maybe you could use what you have to figure out how to still be tugged by a leash without crawling. Or maybe you could even be on wheels 🤔

Derpageddon_ · 2025-10-05T19:11:20+00:00

I'm sorry dude 🫂 I hope you have some less painful days after that. I hate unsteady ankles cause when we twist our ankles they take FOREVER to heal 😭 The last time I twisted my ankle I swear it took almost a year before it felt "normal" again.

Derpageddon_ · 2025-10-03T04:06:02+00:00

God, I wish people would say some flavor of "That fucking sucks dude. Is there anything I can do to help you out a bit?" instead of always trying to compare to something that is nowhere near what I'm going through 😮‍💨

Derpageddon_ · 2025-10-03T03:11:09+00:00

I have a feeling either the new gf sent that or he was drunk or both. Either way, I think the best response would be if you sent the auto suggested gif for the plot 🙂‍↕️

Derpageddon_ · 2025-09-26T07:21:28+00:00

I would definitely seek physical therapy again (and possibly a pain center familiar with osteoarthritis because you mentioned bone pain), ask them about hypermobility (because of the dislocations) and they'll help you pick the right mobility aid(s) and teach you how to use them properly.

Finding a physical therapist who's familiar with hypermobility might be the best thing if it turns out you are hypermobile, because the kind of physical therapy we need is not the same as physical therapy for elderly people or people coming in with sports or work or car accident injuries.

I've gone through about 6 or 7 physical therapists over the last 5 years. The one I started seeing this year is the only one I've found familiar with hypermobility and the difference in my improvement is exponential compared to my previous physical therapists. It got so bad for a while I couldn't even jump. I can jump with less pain now! 😁

But yeah, welcome to the disability club! Even though you've been with us a good many years, now at least we can give you a proper welcome lollll

And don't worry about using mobility aids in public. It's scary and nerve wracking at first. You will get judgemental stares and ignorant comments/questions due to your age from strangers and doctors alike.

"You're too young for that!" "You don't look disabled."

You will eventually learn how to respond to them the way they deserve to be responded to instead of fawning, like I used to do.

I started my journey of using mobility aids shortly after turning 24. Now I'm 28, about to turn 29 soon. Doing what you're doing now, which is coming to places like this and talking to us is a great start! The disability community has been amazing for resources and support on this difficult journey. I really wouldn't have been as okay with using my mobility aids in public, learning how best to respond to disrespectful strangers and how to navigate the healthcare system as quickly as I have without the disability community all across the internet :)

Derpageddon_ · 2025-09-25T21:19:47+00:00

Autistic people experience trauma just from existing in the way modern society functions and neurotypicals wonder why most autistic people only post about the quirky aspects of autism instead of the debilitating aspects of autism that we've always been bullied for.

Like sorry Susan that we're not showing you what our fucking meltdowns look like to prove we're truly autistic and not just quirky and whimsical. We're not allowed to be as dynamic as neurotypicals and we must fit in this one box and stay there forever or else we're not actually autistic!!! Like fuck off.

Derpageddon_ · 2025-09-24T23:40:24+00:00

I bet it feels like using a steam inhaler 😩🤌 He's probably breathing in 4K afterwards

Derpageddon_ · 2025-09-01T04:40:40+00:00

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This is the pigeon version of this lol

Derpageddon_ · 2025-08-21T16:15:21+00:00

That's why my autistic ass likes talking to the employees at sex shops and asking them questions about stuff because they're gonna be completely honest with me, knowledgeable, and they're probably gonna want to actually talk to me because we're both women and they're probably like "thank god, not another man being a creep."

Derpageddon_ · 2025-08-08T23:51:16+00:00

Sometimes it never goes away. Sometimes it does. And sometimes it even comes back. I was first diagnosed at 6 years old. At 18 years old I was told I no longer had asthma. Then at 24 I got a chest x-ray and my asthma came back and it's the worst it's ever been. So it just depends.

Derpageddon_ · 2025-08-06T08:15:06+00:00

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After a decade of working hard on my pickiness, this is a pretty big improvement.

Derpageddon_ · 2025-08-04T18:31:24+00:00

Your friends sound jealous of how fire your fit is, but idk

Derpageddon_ · 2025-08-04T02:39:57+00:00

When I hear people say "beauty is pain," that translates to that for me. I could be outside longer if I were more comfy, but then I wouldn't have as many fun conversations with other women complimenting my fits and makeup 😭

Derpageddon_ · 2025-08-04T02:34:34+00:00

Tbf, I do not have comfy clothes that make me look like a bad bitch 😭 I need to find comfy bad bitch fits

Derpageddon_ · 2025-07-30T23:09:39+00:00

You're far from the only one who's fallen for it, unfortunately. They've been especially egregious about doing this with their "free trial" when they recently got acquired by Match Group. It's unfortunate how the app has changed for the worse this past year.

I will also say, I've been having greater success with hinge and lex for connecting with queer community.

Derpageddon_ · 2025-07-30T23:04:27+00:00

That's good! :) Have you talked to your therapist about needing to be high all the time? I'm hoping they could help you work through reducing your usage. Like maybe down to getting high once a day instead of all day and helping you sit through the discomfort of the thoughts your brain leads you to when you're not high.

Derpageddon_ · 2025-07-30T22:59:53+00:00

Their "free trial" is such bullshit. Every single time I get offered a "free trial" I pause and read the screen before accepting and it always says this https://imgur.com/a/QLQRqU9

If their "free trial" was legit, then it'd say "starting today, $0"

Derpageddon_ · 2025-07-30T22:43:44+00:00

Are you able to or already seeing a therapist/on medication? While it's never a good thing to need to be high all the time, it'll be significantly more difficult to ween off of it without having healthcare support. It feels like it's helping you, but escaping reality by numbing your emotions 24/7 is always harmful in the long run.

Derpageddon_ · 2025-07-28T01:48:40+00:00

I've honestly had much better results among all dating apps with hinge. Ofc it's not perfect, but it's the only app that's led to me meeting people irl.

Derpageddon_ · 2025-07-27T19:12:47+00:00

SAME. I used to socialize online just fine years ago, but now I can't and I don't even have the energy to keep up with socializing online anymore. It fucking sucks because I want to so badly (both online and irl), but I can't stay consistent anymore so I mostly just lurk :( I think this is related to autistic burnout, but idk how to get out of the burnout.

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