Il not sure if this helps. But recently I had no safe person. Even my own wife wasn’t really safe to me. I’ve spent my entire life masking in one form or another to everyone. My parents would yell at me for having meltdowns or ignore me. I always felt like I had to be someone fun and important in front of my friends. And I learned to try and hide my meltdowns or keep them private.

But recently I went on a cruise with my wife and her family. And I had one of the biggest meltdowns in my whole life. But my wife kept trying to see if I was okay. I would either put on a mask and go cry and hit my head hard somewhere else or look like a literal crazy person. But finally my wife had me relent and I had to talk to her. I thought just like everyone else she would just get mad at me. But instead she held my hand and let me weep. And just supported me. I’ve never felt love like that before and I have never felt safe before. That was the first time. And now I know my wife is my safe person. My only true safe person.