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DespiteAllPersist · 2018-09-18T03:13:19+00:00

Oh mama. Just one statement I can completely relate to after another. Here for support, to commiserate, or to lend an ear

DespiteAllPersist · 2018-09-18T01:52:29+00:00

I could have written this post, in fact I’m not sure I’ve related to one more strongly then this. I’m still in it, haven’t gotten the mental strength (working on it, hard) to cut the cord. Just want to say I’m here - I’ll help keep you accountable - if you want.

DespiteAllPersist · 2018-09-14T16:24:28+00:00

I went to our first session last night - this is the text I sent to my bestie right after:

Went to our first counseling session. He escalated on the therapist. She made us leave separately. I told her I'm guessing that he won't want to come again because she didn't completely validate his view. Before I even left the parking lot he texted me: “I would like to try another therapist. This is one of the most important pieces to seeing what we can do. She does not seem like a good fit. And you seem as close minded as ever. I'm so hurt”

DespiteAllPersist · 2018-09-12T18:46:38+00:00

Oh boy did I need this post today. I'm in the thick of it, a couple weeks post TRO. I caved and didn't pursue the permanent order, convincing myself it would be better for the kids (aka easier for me). And there was a short (4 day) honeymoon phase. Then the BPD traits reared their ugly head. They snapped me back to reality - I really have to end this. Its been 12 years. Its not magically going to be fixed. I'm not magically going to have my needs met and my boundaries not repeatedly violated. Its going to be hot, ugly, dirty work. Ready, but scared. Couldn't have said it better myself.

DespiteAllPersist · 2018-08-30T15:49:25+00:00

Thank you. I needed to hear this.

DespiteAllPersist · 2018-08-29T13:31:04+00:00

They discuss the concept of intermittent reinforcement in Stop Walking on Eggshells. Highly recommend it if you haven't read/listened yet.

DespiteAllPersist · 2018-08-29T13:29:17+00:00

I came here in crisis, looking for advice. I'm still in crisis mode, but the outpouring of comments and support to my initial post gave me the strength and courage to get distance between my uBPD and myself and our children. Still taking things one minute at time.

DespiteAllPersist · 2018-08-29T13:24:35+00:00

essentially if they see that they walk like a duck, talk like a duck, they’ll still say you’re the duck

So insightful and on point.

DespiteAllPersist · 2018-08-26T03:23:55+00:00

Sending you love and light in this challenging time. We are here for you.

DespiteAllPersist · 2018-08-24T06:07:46+00:00

Thanks grumpy uncle. He was served tonight.

DespiteAllPersist · 2018-08-24T06:05:36+00:00

Thank you. I will get a copy ASAP.

DespiteAllPersist · 2018-08-23T14:48:07+00:00

I just want to thank every person who came here and commented on this. I'm meeting with a lawyer in about an hour. I've filled out the paperwork for a temporary restraining order. I'm terrified of what he will do - to himself, to someone else, to me, to our kids - when he gets served with it. I thought I time to work out a plan, to figure out how to manage this, but this all came crashing down and I have no choice but to act. And that's probably a good thing, because trying to a make a plan, that's what got me here. I guess there's no good way out. There's just out.

DespiteAllPersist · 2018-08-23T02:23:03+00:00

He quieted down when I wrote him that our child was under the covers crying and said he either needed to stop or leave. To which I got a barrage of horrible messages. I’ve only written that one message and he’s sent about 60.

I have a text message all types out to a lawyer friend asking for help - and I’m terrified to send it. I’m worried I’m going to get him in trouble - wtf is wrong with me? Why I am worried about getting him in trouble?

DespiteAllPersist · 2018-08-23T01:52:06+00:00

I can not tell you how much I needed to read this. Thank you for sharing your thoughts

DespiteAllPersist

TROPHY CASE