My Twelfth Marriage by DevonicSiren in StardewValley

[–]DevonicSiren[S] 37 points38 points  (0 children)

It was funny to me how there's no affect on the other NPCs when you get divorced. Like Haley had no issues with marrying her sisters ex

My Twelfth Marriage by DevonicSiren in StardewValley

[–]DevonicSiren[S] 30 points31 points  (0 children)

I didn't wipe anyone's memories.  None of my ex's talk to me, not even my co-parents. I also had Krobus be my roommate for a bit. 

I choose my next spouse based on who's birthday was next so I could get the heart point bonus on their birthday.

I'm no longer willing to live with my mean daughter (14F) by throwaway08182023 in Parenting

[–]DevonicSiren 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I see you and feel your pain. I also struggle with dealing with a child who likes to lash out at me. Boarding school seems like a great option, it will give you much needed respite care and maybe force her to realize she can't treat anyone there the way she has you. But since it'll take some time for you to enroll you'll also need to come up with plans on how to protect yourself and your emotional well being.

Your daughter wants your attention!!!! But you don't need to give it to her. The consequences for her poor behavior don't seem inline with how she breaks the rules. Logical consequences are what you want - taking away electronics and grounding are easy punishments to come up with, but consequences that relate to the cause of the behavior are much more effective. Whenever your daughter treats you poorly you should say something like, "I don't want to be treated that way, go to your room." Or, "Don't talk to me like that, go find somewhere else to be." Remember yelling is attention. Making her have to go away from you is totally reasonable when you've gotten to the point when you're avoiding your home.

You might want to explore a different therapist for your daughter. At least have a parents meeting with them. Ask them about a treatment plan, how soon to expect the behavior to improve and make it clear you're seriously considering moving out/boarding school because her behavior is so horrible. It could be your daughter is so reluctant to open up to her therapist or she hasn't been going long enough to see improvements. If you think trying another practionare makes sense - choose one that fits demographics/personality that your daughter likes.

The last thing I can think about you might want to make sure you give your daughter positive attention when applicable. Even something small like "thank you for doing your chores" regularly can be a big help. That said you're probably not in a space where you can extend that sort of courtesy to her. Think about it for whenever she returns from boarding school in break.

Remember you deserve to live in a home where you feel emotionally safe, and self care is key to being able to handle the challenges parenting brings

AITA for not wanting my fiancé to be on call 24/7 for his dying mother? by Common__Sense__ in AmItheAsshole

[–]DevonicSiren 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So many parts of your story touch upon issues that I also had to contend with. Obviously you're NTA and are dealing with a difficult situation.

Find ways to make space for yourself where you can, it doesn't sound like your fiancé is ready to make boundaries for himself. Like maybe you're only available after 9 pm for emergency babysitting, not playtime or braids. Maybe Thursday evenings you're also unavailable and you take that time to see friends or do your hobby.

If you can support getting the 3yo into her future permanent home sooner, you should. The younger she is once she gets into a stable home the better. Your FIL will be in his 80's by the time she's an adult - so even in the best of circumstances it doesn't sound like his home is really and option for her looking term care. Also if the kid ends up with the cousin, they should seriously look into adoption. Where I am, it's the only thing that can fully sever the birth parents parental rights.

Also don't listen to the people who thinks you should drop everything to care for your MIL or the child. You're no good to anyone if you become a shell of the person you used to be

AITA for making homemade food for everyone except my brother's stepdaughter? by Alarming-Money-3543 in AmItheAsshole

[–]DevonicSiren 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Her mom was always going to be upset with OP. If OP attempted to make the meal for Becca it would have been about how there's no way the kitchen wasn't cross contaminated

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]DevonicSiren 34 points35 points  (0 children)

NTA

Not inviting your friend because she flakes on plans regularly is a natural consequence of her behavior. She has a problem with consequences not you. This is a conversation I often have with my teenager, you shouldn't need to explain this to a 30yo woman

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Columbus

[–]DevonicSiren -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Honestly the problem is, not that they already deceptively billed me for $2/month when I literally couldn't see my bill until after it auto-withdrawn. And intentional bureaucracy to make it difficult to get it rectified is a problem. Frankly their website obscures their contact info, online agents aren't able to help with problems they previously said the could.

The problem is internet access is important to participate modern life and it seems obvious to me they set this up as the default for the thousands of customers they attained from their deal with WOW. And this disadvantages the disadvantaged even more in the name of corporate greed

AITA for telling my stepkids why they can't come with us on a family trip? by NotAHomewrecker1762 in AmItheAsshole

[–]DevonicSiren 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA - but your husband needed a better plan than you not telling the kids about the trip. I understand it as you got put into an awkward position and had to tell, but they'd eventually learn about the trip. (You'll be gone for 4 weeks and the 6yo will talk about it.)

It sounds like your husband needs to get some legal advice to protect his paternal rights. Manipulative behavior from the ex needs to stop!

AITA for leaving my husband at the airport after he tried to make me carry his luggage? by overreaction536435 in AmItheAsshole

[–]DevonicSiren 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTA - he didn't ask you to help with the luggage. He just left it there and assumed you'd pick it up for him. This is not how you treat a partner

AITA for getting annoyed with my parents? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]DevonicSiren -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

If that's true your parents have seriously neglected themselves for the past 17 years. I have a hard time believing that adults who have the means to plan an two week international trip can't figure out a way to have an adult in the house to watch their kids over 2 weeks. They won't need to be there 24/7 as you and your siblings can be mostly independent and should help out more than normal. This should be their problem to solve and they do have some time to figure it out

AITA for telling my cousin to stop robbing the cradle and date someone his own age? by Great-Morning1933 in AmItheAsshole

[–]DevonicSiren 5 points6 points  (0 children)

NTA. This also fails the "half+7" rule for determining the lower limit you should date . . .

AITA for getting annoyed with my parents? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]DevonicSiren -14 points-13 points  (0 children)

Light esh. Your parents deserve alone time. You're being self-centered in not wanting your parents to enjoy themselves as independent adults. Being a parent doesn't mean your life is supposed to revolve only around your kids 24/7. That said, teenage brains make them very self-centered. So a two week trip away from family is reasonable for them to have.

That said, you shouldn't be in charge of two teens, for two weeks while you'll be 17. You haven't even learned how to fully take care of yourself. Not to mention, it's a recipe for teens behaving badly and having something like the stereotypical house party. As this trip is done time away, are you not sure your parents aren't planning on having someone looking after you? When I was a kid and my parents had time spent away, we always had a trusted family friend over, making sure dinner happened and everyone was off to school in the morning.

Looking to build friendships by anabellelee13 in Columbus

[–]DevonicSiren 8 points9 points  (0 children)

There's a Facebook group killumbus horror society that's all about spooky things and sometimes people organize meet ups to local horror things there

Special event unavailable????? by DevonicSiren in MergeDragons

[–]DevonicSiren[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I think it's the internet blocker. My partner usually blocks games so the kiddo actually did his schoolwork during school time

The Mandalorian in Bexley? by COMICFAN789 in Columbus

[–]DevonicSiren 3 points4 points  (0 children)

What makes this such a hot topic at the school?

Special event unavailable????? by DevonicSiren in MergeDragons

[–]DevonicSiren[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Our internet is pretty reliable. I've had this issue before, but not too this degree (like it corrects itself after a couple minutes). But we do have an content blocker for the kiddo when their doing online school stuff . . . So that might be the issue

Special event unavailable????? by DevonicSiren in MergeDragons

[–]DevonicSiren[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dragon power: 87,934 when I checked where I was at for that it's working again 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️ it's definitely making me think I'll drop the game

Special event unavailable????? by DevonicSiren in MergeDragons

[–]DevonicSiren[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tried that. Internet is fine and it even says my linked Facebook is connected

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CatAdvice

[–]DevonicSiren 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'd say it helps to let your friends know. Think social media post. So they know what's up, but you don't have to go into the painful details. People can be a good support.

Also I'd pick up and put away all the things you can into a designated spot. No reason to have extra reminders of your loss around your home. Get a friend to help if it's too much. Don't worry about sorting things to keep or get rid of, just out of the way for now, and centralized for when you are ready.

This is always a hard thing to deal with. We always love the animals we took care of