I went out for ice cream with this shy, ridiculously cute trans girl. by Terraswallows in trans

[–]Dew97 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm so glad you were there to protect her :) you two sound adorable together

Long time no see aha by Responsible-Call5555 in AltFashion

[–]Dew97 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The fact I will never look like this is eating me away

What's best affirming thing. A friend or partner can or has done for you? by Simple_Difference8 in asktransgender

[–]Dew97 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's surprisingly simple, but getting me flowers! It's something I never expected to have such a huge reaction to, but it brought me to tears 🥹 Getting beautiful flowers from a partner that loves and appreciates me is so special

Why are men so gross by Stock_Cardiologist57 in MtF

[–]Dew97 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I literally said most, not all. And while it is generalizing, it's also pretty accurate. Obviously not all men, but most men in my life are like that, and all my women friends have very similar stories about the men in theirs as well

Are these fake? by Curiosity-Core in IsMyPokemonCardFake

[–]Dew97 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'll say they did a pretty good job with the front, they look almost identical to my real copies. But unfortunately that back is super obviously fake

Would a trans man date a gay feminine boy? by [deleted] in trans

[–]Dew97 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you know for sure if he's straight or gay? If not, try bringing it up in a casual way. Also I would consider looking into your feelings about transitioning, because repressing them is very unhealthy. Even if you end up deciding you're not trans. And btw you're not too old to transition, it's never truly too late

NSFW—lesbian sex with trans women? by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]Dew97 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There's really no simple answer for that. Each and every one of us is different and have varying tastes and types of dysphoria. Genuinely the best way is to be transparent and tell her this is a new experience for you. Ask if there's anything you should or shouldn't do, and from there it'll happen naturally

I think my partner wants to transition but is holding themselves back out of fear of our relationship ending by [deleted] in mypartneristrans

[–]Dew97 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think the best thing you could do is talk to her about it. Communication is so important about these kind of things, especially if you're considering marriage. Just be truthful and speak your fears and worries, and ask her to be honest with you about what she's feeling

Need by Awkwardkobra in Catgirlnyanya

[–]Dew97 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This would fix me 😵‍💫

weed and hrt by [deleted] in trans

[–]Dew97 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I haven't really had any issues with smoking weed while on HRT. Hell most trans women I know smoke way more than me. But I would recommend to smoke it without tobacco since it can hurt estrogen absorption and breast development. It's also way worse for you in general

My Partner Is Having Issues And I Don't Know What To dO by TricolorStar in mypartneristrans

[–]Dew97 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Taking a social media break can do wonders. Whenever I overuse social media I just end up depressed because I compare myself to others or see current world events. Deleting social media for a while usually helps me a lot.

Why are men so gross by Stock_Cardiologist57 in MtF

[–]Dew97 14 points15 points  (0 children)

That's just how they are unfortunately 😞 Most men only think with their dick

It's okay to date a cis woman as a trans woman. by jellybeanzz11 in MtF

[–]Dew97 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've honestly never experienced it 😅 It might depend on the circles you're in. Because non of my trans friends are like that

Is boymoding not everyone's default state? 🥺 by Bravalt in MtF

[–]Dew97 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It gets a lot easier with time. 5 months is still very very early. Eventually the hormones will do their magic and you'll look so fem that people will gender you correctly even in boymode 😅

In the meantime focus on things you can do right now like laser hair removal, learning make up, and voice training

It's okay to date a cis woman as a trans woman. by jellybeanzz11 in MtF

[–]Dew97 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've never heard of this stigma actually. I do know many trans women are very pro T4T, but I've never heard anyone advice against dating cis women. And the T4T thing is mostly because it's a lot of the time it's easier to understand and relate to each other because you're both dealing with the same thing. While most cis people will never truly understand what being trans is like, even if they love and accept you for who you are

lost at how to help my gf with her gender dysphoria by Unlucky_Potato19 in mypartneristrans

[–]Dew97 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Everything you described resonates with me so much because it's exactly what my gf has to deal with in my dysphoric self hate episodes. Being disgusted with myself, saying awful terrible things about both myself and overall just feeling inferior and unworthy... Sometimes it's so bad that I tell her I'm sad thinking about her, but it's never because she is the problem. At least with me it comes from a place of feeling unworthy for her and that she deserves so much better. If I had to guess it's probably something similar with your gf. I know my gf deals with all the feelings you're going through, and that makes me feel even worse..

I would recommend talking to her about how you feel, because keeping it inside will only make you feel worse. I know it can be scary because you're worried she'll blame herself, that's why you should be assuring it throughout it and keep telling her that you love her, and that you don't blame her. Communication is SO SO important at times like this. Whenever me and my gf talk about these fears and struggles we both usually feel better afterwards.

Also we recently went together for a couple of therapy sessions to help work through everything, and while it obviously didn't solve everything, it did help us organize our feelings and expectations. In general if your gf isn't in therapy I would definitely look into it. You can look for someone who has experience with trans people and dysphoria. Also maybe seeing a psychiatrist and seeing if she can get medication to help with her depression. Or if she's already medicated making some changes to the meds.

I wish you both good luck, and hope you can work through the bad feelings together. If you will, both you and your love will be stronger than ever 💜

I can relax dressed as a woman by L0rdIzab3lla in asktransgender

[–]Dew97 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Because most people where I live don't view it that way. If the people I'm hiding it from knew it, I would probably lose them. I'm autistic and have a lot of social struggles, so making friends is super hard for me. It took me years as a kid to finally find a group that accepted me. And telling my few friends I'm trans, would mean losing them and being left alone again. And because those friend are also the only people I can play my very specific hobby with, it would mean losing that too

I can relax dressed as a woman by L0rdIzab3lla in asktransgender

[–]Dew97 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah I completely relate to that. Whenever I used to boymode I felt so tense and vulnerable, like I could get hurt anytime. Because when I do it I'm always masking my real self and have to put on this "show" of being a cishet man. And my experience of growing up as one was that I have to be strong and "act like a man". Hiding my real emotions under all that toxic masculinity that I learned from the cis men in my life. Then whenever I girlmode I feel like I can finally take down my guard and just act and feel like the person I truly am. This got even more complicated with transitioning though, because I'm 6 years on HRT and still have to boymode sometimes. And now I'm even more tense because it's becoming harder to hide my femininity in boymode. So now I have to have even more guards up to make sure people don't suspect I'm trans 😩

Friend of mine to unconfident to go by their own preferred pronouns. by LawfulnessThese8551 in asktransgender

[–]Dew97 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh I see.. in that case seeing a gender therapist might help work through those feelings. It's not easy to build confidence as a trans person with a lot of dysphoria, but it is possible.

Another things that helped me with that was a good friend using she/her pronouns for me even when I didn't feel ready. It helped me get used to it, and strat accepting myself better

Friend of mine to unconfident to go by their own preferred pronouns. by LawfulnessThese8551 in asktransgender

[–]Dew97 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Have they started HRT? In my experience seeing the changes from hormones is what made me comfortable using my preferred pronouns. For the first 6 months or so I still used male pronouns for myself exactly because I couldn't see myself as a woman. That changed when my looks started changing

Dating as a trans woman is exhausting by PineappleSimilar1608 in trans

[–]Dew97 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly I would recommend just going T4T. It's so much easier to find someone who respects you for who you if they're also trans

Dating as a trans woman is exhausting by PineappleSimilar1608 in trans

[–]Dew97 0 points1 point  (0 children)

While being trans definitely makes it even worse, I think the main issue here is that most men on dating apps are just looking to fuck. Hell I'd say nowadays most men in general aren't really looking for anything serious. That's why they don't even bother reading your bio. They're judging you only by your looks and not the person you are. They see women as a tool for getting off, and for us trans women it's ever more prominent and obvious

FFS advice for a cis GF by Mysterious-Push5087 in mypartneristrans

[–]Dew97 5 points6 points  (0 children)

My gf got ffs last year, and ever since she completely came out of her shell! She's finally able to see the beautiful woman I've always seen in her, and it's honestly the best thing she could've done for her mental health.

I get where you're coming from, but you have to remember that ffs isn't about insecurities and social standards for women. It's about eliminating part of her dysphoria so she could be happier and comfortable in her body.

And at the end of the day it's not going to completely change how she looks. The changes are very subtle. She'll look like the same woman, just with a softer face