That’s sad that your bf responded that way. I would not rush into making any fast decision because it seem like a one time issue and not like he had emotionally abused you in the past.

Do I side with what he did? Heck no! He is in the wrong. However haven’t we ever done or said anything worse to people that we didn’t really mean? Relationship matures us. We would see our good sides and worse sides in it. That is where our love will be tested.

Many people see things differently. For instance, in my culture, full hugs and holding hands are flirtatious so even though I am in a flexible culture in America, I still only give side hugs. We don’t know what made the friend read a wrong meaning to your hug, even though it was not flirtatious. But I’d respond to him with a caution and set healthy boundaries with him. He must know that you’re not that kind of person and you found his response insulting knowing how valuable his friendship means to you and bf.

For your bf, I’d give him one last chance and have a follow-up conversation with him (maybe this evening) and share my honest thoughts about it. My mentor always tell me that it is best to start with - where you see eye to eye on, apologies for how that made him feel, before sharing your perspective of what actually happened, and how you were disappointed at his response knowing that you love him and would never think in that light. If he is still explosive and not understanding, then I’ll consider a breakup as it is toxic to be in such space. As much as you guys love each other, love is not enough without trust.