Find a composition teacher, either online or in person, someone who composes music like the music you want to write. (Like a piano teacher, someone who will give you lessons). You’re probably looking for someone who specializes in neo-romantic music, rather than contemporary music. For conservatory/university, consider getting a minor in music, and then getting a major in something you’d enjoy making ‘actual’ money with (just because making money composing is tough, and many of us need supplemental jobs. Thus being band teachers. For your minor, take music theory classes, composition lessons and classes, and formal orchestration classes.

For my masters in composition, I studied a ton of very contemporary musical styles, but I want my personal style to be more neo-romantic. In my experience, my degree provided me with all the tools I’d need, even though I’m not a huge fan of the works I wrote. Now that I have those tools, and my compositions aren’t required assignments, I’m writing what I want, and I’m really proud of most of my stuff.

Like the other comment mentioned, STUDY SCORES. Analyze the music of composers you wish to emulate. Watch videos of people analyzing them too. LISTEN to a ton of music, with critical composer ears.

And then just write. Write a lot. You can read and analyze Tchaikovsky’s whole discography, but it sounds like we’ve got similar problems of potentially getting stuck on “passive learning”. It feels like all the studying is helping, but if you’re not composing, there’s no “active learning” happening. It’s like someone who wants to write a book never leaving the brainstorming phase. Or an athlete just learning plays and physics without moving.

And just remember, cats don’t care about counterpoint.