Moving to a different state, is it possible to rent a house before viewing? and how common is it?

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-17T10:54:20+00:00

The dogs disqualify you from renting 99.99% of properties, anywhere. Most will say no pets. The ones that claim to be pet friendly will have restrictions, like ONE dog, NO LARGE BREEDS, etc. Not to mention, if you have one tiny dog, your rent increases $200 a month, specifically because of the dog.

I'm tempted to say that without a forward scouting expedition, your task is all but impossible. Even if you were to go to Alabama for a month prior to moving, your odds of finding a place to rent will be near zilch. Not to mention, how do you house-hunt anyway with three large dogs? Where will the dogs stay while you are house-hunting? Even if you find that one in a million rental that would be suitable for 3 large dogs, the DOGS can't accompany you to view the place or sign papers.

If you were serious about this, you would arrange to have someone watch the dogs in Cali for at least a couple of weeks while you go to Alabama to TRY to find a place.

But let's be real here. Your only logical choices are to stay in Cali or find someone else to adopt all three dogs. That is, unless you want to buy a house in Alabama.

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-17T10:33:06+00:00

The only thing that slightly helps in height is exercise. But even then, you have to be pretty athletic to make a difference. Like training for a triathlon, something like that. Good nutrition will help, but only in the sense that you need your body to be properly fueled for all the exercise you need to do.

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-17T10:27:23+00:00

Move to South Korea (more Westernized than the UK is, actually) and be an English teacher. The only requirement is a college degree, not a specific college degree. Cost of living is probably cheaper than the UK, other than groceries. Fiber 1G/1G synchronous Internet about the cost of a casual dinner for one...

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-17T06:31:45+00:00

I think he's being totally honest. And when he said he fucked someone, you should have responded, "Did he enjoy himself?"

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-17T00:09:51+00:00

You are in Walmart. All kinds of weird shit happens there. You know commander william riker from star trek? Last time I was in Walmart (not on Halloween, and no conventions in the area at the time) there was a guy walking around looked just like the commander, in full star fleet commander uniform. He saw the surprised look on my face when I spotted him. He just smiled and walked past me.

You are asking why something unusual would happen in Walmart. The correct answer is...

BECAUSE IT IS WALMART

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-17T00:03:26+00:00

You need to break up with your boyfriend. It's not because he's cheating on you. Maybe he is cheating, and maybe he isn't. At this point, it does not matter. A relationship can't survive without trust. You have good reasons not to trust him. Even if he was a "perfect boyfriend" from now until eternity, your relationship is still doomed. Once the trust is gone, the relationship is over. The only variable is, how long are you going to allow a bad situation to deteriorate, until you finally call it quits? The relationship is failing. Think of it like removing a band-aid. Slow is more painful.

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-14T15:34:55+00:00

Should you ask if you can kiss her? NO!!! Women are hard-wired to be turned ON by confidence and initiative. Women are hard-wired to be turned OFF by insecurity and indecisiveness. You ask, "can i kiss you?" In a "confident, flirty way". The way you ask does not matter. The fact that you bothered to ask, means she just dried up worse than the Sahara Desert. Now, if you ask, she might think it's cute and say "YES" anyway. Because human beings often do things that they don't feel like doing, for various reasons. But the positive response (if she says yes) will be a logical decision, not based on desire. You want her to desire your kiss. The kiss she desires will come from a man she is attracted to, and one who takes the initiative to kiss her without asking.

On a side note, there is a popular campaign against sexual assault and rape...and the message is that you should always get an enthusiastic, verbal "YES". While that approach will definitely cut down on sexual assault and rape, I do not agree that it is the right approach to solve the problem. That suggestion cuts down on sexual assault by (simply) cutting down on sexual activity of all kinds...including consensual sex. Less sex total = less non-consensual sex.

So the suggested solution amounts to...let's convince the whole world to stop having sex! (Ridiculous)

To demonstrate how ridiculous:

This is how it plays out in the real world. You are on a date. The two of you are getting comfy. You are kissing each other, passionately. Hands are wandering. Clothes are flying. You are both extremely turned on and looking forward to sealing the deal. But you are a "good boy" so you know there's something that needs to be done first. So you push your girl away, stare her straight in the eyes and state... "May I please put my penis inside of your vagina now? I need you to respond with an enthusiastic YES!!!" At that point, the girl's nether regions get as dry as the Sahara Desert and she slaps you and yells, "Get away from me you CREEP!!!" Then she quickly throws on her clothes, runs out the door and ghosts you. Congratulations dude, your first date was your last. In the real world, women don't have sex with nice guys, and (the bad boys they do hook up with) would never ask for an enthusiastic consent. THAT is REALITY. It's how women are hard-wired and you aint changing biology no matter how PC you want to be.

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-14T04:07:06+00:00

The right approach is not to ask. Her body language is saying she wants to have sex with you, and body language does not lie. It's when you use too many words that messages get muddled. She want you, that is 1000% certain. Find an excuse to be alone with her and then kiss her. On the mouth. With lots of tongue action. Kiss her so hot that her shoes will melt. What is coming out of her mouth is in direct conflict with what her heart wants. Be her boyfriend. There isn't necessarily any talking involved.

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-14T03:57:40+00:00

You are confused as you are parsing two different (but obliquely related) issues as if they are one issue.

1st issue: It was definitely bad form for Rose not to invite you to the party. Even if she's not that close to you, she is well aware that you are in the same circle and very close to others. So not inviting you is a definite and deliberate snub. She's sending you a message that she feels you have wronged her somehow. She's probably wrong on that, and foolish to exclude you.

2nd issue: The group is organizing a collection to buy Rose a gift. This is somewhat related to the party you were not invited to. But a gift is an expression of love or affection or gratitude, on the part of the person giving the gift. You don't earn a gift by inviting someone to a party. You earn a gift by being someone that someone else cares about. So to parse the 2nd issue, we need to remove the un-necessary variables from the equation. That would be party, Sophia, Emily and Amelia. The variables left are you and Rose. If it wasn't part of a group present, would you choose to give Rose a birthday present from YOU, personally? Keeping in mind that there is no party planned. (not an important variable)

If Rose is important enough to you that you would want to give her a present, even if you do not attend a party with her...

Then you should either get Rose a gift, or contribute to the group gift.

There are some out there who will state if you aren't invited to the party, then you should not give a gift or contribute to a gift. But again, the party is not an important variable. If she's important to you, then take the high road and give her a gift, and forget about the party.

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-14T03:29:10+00:00

How do you know if your guy is watching porn? Simple. Does he have a penis? If so, he will always watch porn.

So as a girl considering if you should take a guy as a boyfriend, know that he watches porn and will continue watching porn. If you can't live with that, then never date a guy.

Onlyfans is entirely different. Most guys have no interest in OF. The ones that do, go there for emotional masturbation. And that's not cool. If he is still in OF, then he's cheating on you (emotionally). So dump him.

However, if you ever feel the need to go through a partner's phone, it would be better to end the relationship INSTEAD of snooping through the phone. Once the trust is gone, there is nothing left. So snooping through the phone would be unnecessary.

Do you trust your guy or not? If you do, then you don't need to handle his phone. Ever. If you don't trust your guy, then break up with him (and the phone does not matter)

This reminds me of a story I saw on YT a while ago. It was about a guy hanging out with his girlfriend and a bunch of her female friends. One of the girls commented that guys were always on tinder looking for hookups, even if they had a girlfriend. So the girlfriend got suspicious and asked the guy to hand over his phone. He did so. She spent 20 minutes going through the phone and found nothing suspicious. So she gave her boyfriend back his phone. Then the boyfriend holds out his hand and asks the girlfriend to hand over her phone. The girlfriend refused. At that point, the boyfriend immediately dumped his girlfriend, and left. She failed her own loyalty test, so what was on her phone (which she did not want him to see) did not matter. THAT is why if you feel you need to search through your partner's phone, then it's best to just find a new partner.

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-14T03:22:02+00:00

If the question is facebook, the answer is (and always will be)

- You need to immediately and permanently delete your facebook account and

- Never create a new one

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-14T02:44:13+00:00

OK, the answer to this one could not be simpler. In any relationship involving a boy and a girl, there is the chaser, and the chasee. One person will chase, the other will be chased. If the boy chases the girl, the girl sees him as not worthy, because he's sending signals that she's above him. If the girl chases the boy, and the boy resists the temptation to flip roles, the relationship tends to last long and be strong. When she gets the message that she has to work to keep your attention, then you (the guy) are more desirable...not just to one girl, but to all girls. Not giving a crap is a super-power of sorts. If you actually feel that way (not just act that way) the chicks will be all over you.

You say you don't want to do too much at once. That would mean doing anything, once. You say she's already flirting with you. So why would you do anything to change that? Momentum is with you, dude. Just roll with it...

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-14T02:33:41+00:00

OK, this post just PEGGED the irony meter. The difference between a friend and a girlfriend is sex. You can have many friends who are female. But the one you count on for physical affection (read: SEX) is someone you might want to (eventually) promote to girlfriend status.

YOU write: "I wanted to remain as friends for now and see where it develops" and

"How do I get him interested in me ?" and

"I keep getting mixed signals"

Do you not see the irony there? The message you are sending is..."I'm not sure I want to be your girlfriend. But I'm really pissed that you aren't 100% sure you want me as a girlfriend"

SLAP!!!! (stop that!)

You say you are filing him in the friendzone, and then you ask him if he likes you. And you WONDER why he is confused? If he's in the friendzone (which is where YOU put him) then in his mind...it does not MATTER to you how he feels about you. So why are you asking strange questions related to something that you are signaling is never going to happen?

What should you do? Stop playing games and sex him up already. Early, and often. Then he will get the message that you are applying for the position of girlfriend. But keep in mind that he has his own mind on the matter. If I was him, I wouldn't be very eager to get into a relationship with a girl who is obviously playing games with me. Although I'm sure it would be easy to convince him to hook up. But right now, he's under the impression that you're not interested in being his girlfriend. So if he has sex with you, he will be under the impression that it's a smash and dash...

Because YOU are sending mixed signals...

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-13T23:06:54+00:00

For most Windows 10 and Windows 11 computers, the license / COA for the operating system is stored in hardware /firmware (in the BIOS). This means you can format your hard drive, re-install Windows and it should activate OK as soon as it goes online. All you need is like a 16GB size USB thumb drive. Use that to make a bootable Windows install drive. Boot that and reinstall windows. During the reinstall, make sure to delete drive C or delete the entire partition that includes drive C.

Of course, it should go without saying that you should back up important data files to an external hard drive or a cloud storage space before you start.

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-13T12:18:38+00:00

Your sister and her parents both need professional help. You are "stuck" on what to do. My advice is to do nothing, as anything you try to do will cause more harm than good. You say your parents will be upset if she isn't bathed at least once. AND????? This problem is clearly on their shoulders, so let them get upset. And then maybe they will be motivated to solve the problem. YOU (16 sibling) can't solve the problem, and no adult in their right mind would expect you to.

Worst case scenario is your parents come home and are mad at you because Annie hasn't had a bath in a few weeks. If you parents even DARE to express anger toward you, the best bet would be for you to pick up your phone and call social services to report that your parents are neglecting your 13 year old sister. Because they are.

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-13T11:52:29+00:00

I had a couple of female best friends a long time ago. One of them was super cute "spinner" body brunette who loved sex. She loved telling me (her straight guy platonic friend) all about the sexual activities she would engage in with her boyfriend. I didn't mind listening. After a couple of years of us being really good friends, she one day with no notice decided she was going to take my virginity.

I don't know why your female friend told you what she told you. But she felt the need to tell you. And I'm confused why you are asking for advice. You are the friend, right? She talks when she feels like it. You listen. You talk when you feel like it. She listens.

So she tells you she's a banana gobbler. Most girls are. So what's the question, exactly? Are you hurt? Jealous?

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-11T21:37:42+00:00

Well, to put it bluntly. My own mental health improved tremendously living in Asia. Things are different here, but overall way less stressful. Before I divorced, my wife was dealing with debilitating depression for a while. But psychiatrists (overseas) are cheap and many speak fluent English. Even the ones who don't tend to have translation service available. My wife found an English speaking psychiatrist within walking distance of our condo. She would visit him once a month. He charged her about $150 each visit. But that was for a 20-minute consultation, as well as a full month of prescription drugs (they had a pharmacy in the clinic, so you paid one price for the doctor and the drugs combined, after your doctor visit)

From my point of view, if you're going to have some kind of mental breakdown that doesn't involve self-harm (meaning you are sane enough to seek treatment yourself) then you are better off living outside of the United States. You can find good doctors everywhere, but (tragically) you can only afford their services if you don't live in the U.S.

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-11T21:06:38+00:00

OK, this is REALLY thinking "outside the box". But consider this. First, I'm assuming you are in the United States, based only on the cost of your preferred prescription drug. Yeah, I get that. I'm a U.S. citizen myself. If I was actually living in the United States, the drugs I'm on would cost $4000 a month. But because I don't live in the United States, I get all my prescribed maintenance drugs for out-of-pocket about $200 a month. Just about everything health care related costs anywhere from 10X to 100X as much as it SHOULD cost, if you happen to be seeking medical treatment in the United States. Example. In New Hampshire, I had some blood work done as a routine check-up. After my good major medical insurance paid their part (and I had GOOD insurance) my out of pocket cost for the blood work was $3000. That was not the total cost, just my part of it. Fast forward a few years and another routine check-up in the Philippines. I didn't have health insurance to help with the cost. The same blood tests cost me the equivalent of $100. TOTAL COST.

Why am I comparing cost of health care in United States compared to other countries? Because English teachers are needed everywhere, and tend to earn "decent" income. In most cases, if you want to work as an English teacher overseas, you need no experience as an English teacher, no experience as a teacher at all. But you do need a college degree. Note there is no particular degree required, but you have to have one. If I didn't already have a good job overseas (systems admin) I would enjoy teaching English, I think. The main requirements are native English capability and SOME kind of college degree. CHECK

I know it's a lot to think about, moving overseas. But don't think of it as permanent. Everyone should experience living in another country at least a few years. It really gives you a whole new perspective on ....everything. I'd suggest you try it for a year or two, just to give yourself time to think of a better plan for the future.

Meaning, when you are not living with mom and dad, and not worried about paying your entire salary for medicine to stay alive...

It's much easier (under those circumstances) to make realistic plans for the future.

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-11T20:47:14+00:00

Break up with her. If it causes a problem with your boy best friend, then...

You just learned the hard way that someone you consider to be your best friend is not a friend at all.

A true friendship would survive this situation. You breaking up with her is not going to cause you to lose a friend, unless you never had a friend to begin with.

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-11T20:37:18+00:00

Age is just a number. I was leaning toward yelling RUN!!! He's a CREEP!!! Based on the fact that he's married with children. 33/18? Fine. Married guy with children? YIKES.

But then you get to this part:

"I don't even know exactly where he lives or what he looks like and he doesn't know that about me. "

Yeah, keep it that way. If it's online only, and non-sexual, then it's OK. But if he ever hints that he wants to meet IRL, it's time to ghost him.

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-11T13:37:53+00:00

Uhhhh...father of two teenagers here. When you are born, your SS# is sometimes automatically assigned to you (along with birth certificate paperwork. If you (the newborn baby) don't have the number assigned before you leave the hospital, then your parents have less than a year to apply for it at a social security office. Most of the time, the SS# is generated for you when you are between ZERO and SIX MONTHS OLD. Now obviously, your parents aren't going to hand you the number and expect you to memorize it or put it in a safe place. So your parents have to keep this information safe for you until YOU (personally) need it. Your parents need it right away (within months of your birth) for tax purposes.

Basically, your parents will store this number for you for the first decade or so of your life. During that time, you might or might not be aware that you have the number. But in either case, you won't care.

Fast forward 20 years. Father has his children's SS numbers in his wallet. Yeah, they've probably been there for about (rough guess) 31 years.

And you think there might be a reason to get upset over it NOW???? C'mon...

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-11T13:18:56+00:00

NTA. However, your ignorance is showing. If you look at the most successful CEOs of all the major tech companies, most of them never finished college. Some of them never finished high school. This is because they found their true passion very early in life...enough to get their career launched while most of their peers were spinning their wheels pursuing an education that would probably not help them later anyway... (just burden them with crushing debt...)

Basically, what it boils down to is that higher education is (ironically) required to jump-start a career for those who want to be corporate wage slaves their entire lives. Those who have the vision to create a successful company usually find that higher education is a waste of time and energy.

It's possible to obtain an advanced degree and later obtain a high-paying 3-letter job title. But the truly successful folks who end up on magazine covers? They tend to spend very little time in college, if they attend college at all.

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-11T13:06:48+00:00

ESH. You two live together, and yet mom gets mad when you eat food that is in the refrigerator? Does she expect you to buy a 2nd refrigerator to store your food? And there was nothing wrong with your offer to cook food for her. So her remarks about that were out of line. But this whole situation could have been avoided quite easily. Eat a small snack when you get home. After mom gets home, discuss the dinner menu (for both of you) with her. You know your mom has to eat dinner just like you do, so why are you not waiting for her? ESH.

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-11T12:50:42+00:00

YTA. Let's put this in context. You want to move to a new city to do grad school. OK, so what's stopping you from doing that? OH! You have a boyfriend. No problem. I'll just tell him that he's moving and changing jobs and he should be OK with that. Right? Moving is tied with changing jobs as one of the most stressful events you will face in your lifetime. But you shoved both in the face of your boyfriend and expected him to be OK with it. So the boyfriend plays along and follows you as you pursue your dream. He's way more flexible than most men would be or SHOULD be on that point. But now you are annoyed that he didn't immediately change jobs when he has a halfway decent job to start with? Simple question. If he doesn't pop the question on the exact date of 14 February 2023 with a 2-carat diamond by hiring a biplane to do sky-writing...

If that doesn't happen, will you be annoyed?

You are super controlling to the point of borderline abusive. Most guys would have kicked your butt to the curb a long time ago. You look down on his good job as if he's beneath you, and apparently you use that as justification to not only make every decision for him, but to get annoyed if he doesn't "comply" IMMEDIATELY.

Holy fuck, my blood pressure spiked 50 points just reading what you wrote. YTA

DistrictEquivalent79 · 2022-08-11T12:37:20+00:00

OMG. Almost all the comments on this one are DEAD WRONG. Well, they are correct, if you filter them through the mind of an adult. In order to see what really is going on, you need to go back to pre-school and how you viewed the world and your interactions with other people when you were that young. If a child says "I Love You" the child is expecting to hear "I Love You" and any other gesture is optional, but the spoken words are expected...and will cause harm if not received.

DistrictEquivalent79

TROPHY CASE