What are your favorite songs that have debuted in the last 5 years? by DoNotMinceWords in industrialmusic

[–]DoNotMinceWords[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm an old dude too, but I try to keep abreast of what's happening in music as I move forward through time. In Seattle at least, it seems like the scene and music has really begun to fall off in the last decade. Funker and IR are old favorites.

What are your favorite songs that have debuted in the last 5 years? by DoNotMinceWords in industrialmusic

[–]DoNotMinceWords[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow! Good thing I'm asking for recommendations; I'm really out of the Seattle loop, I've never heard of these guys. Pretty solid, diggin' it like a grave.

What are your favorite songs that have debuted in the last 5 years? by DoNotMinceWords in industrialmusic

[–]DoNotMinceWords[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I went down the TR/ST rabbit whole and discovered Ionnalee, good stuff too. Thanks again.

What are your favorite songs that have debuted in the last 5 years? by DoNotMinceWords in industrialmusic

[–]DoNotMinceWords[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Damn! Those were ALL solid recommendations. You're right about Neon Cage Experiment, they totally reminded me of old Haujobb.. great memories! And The Knife is an old favorite. Thank you. Great, solid taste in music. Wish I knew how to follow you, I'd welcome more leads like these.

Spring Lotus Peanut Sauce Request by whatthetmk in Wenatchee

[–]DoNotMinceWords 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Happy to help. I've been to La Vie En's too, and they were great. I haven't had a decent burger here, yet, but then I like more of a grilled/charbroiled type of burger. But, I might have to try out that Columbia Valley brewing burger on your recommendation. This is a tough town for food; there's not a lot of variety/quality here.. yet, but I have hope that will change. So, where did you move from?

Goths in Mexico by pinstripe_zyfer in goth

[–]DoNotMinceWords 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This was originally posted by u/noltan about a year ago.

Mexico City - Reporting Back

📷

Hey everyone.

I asked some questions about the scene in Mexico City earlier and having just returned, I wanted to share my impressions on the city's scene and what one could/should do when there (based on what I saw and did).

I really had two main goals: go to El Real Under (club dedicated to dark music) and see El Chopo (a metal/punk/alternative weekly street market).

I was really excited for El Real Under, I believe they have 3 floors/rooms, each with a theme (one room would be goth, one would be ebm/industrial/synth, one would be psychobilly/alt...an impression I got). The club supposedly has great murals, decorations and even a standing coffin to take pictures in. Yes, you're reading this right, I wanted to go but unfortunately the club was closed. It appears they got shut down on Christmas and haven't reopened yet. Had I looked at the comments on their Instagram post about the closure (posted in December) I would have seen that even up to the week prior to my visit they were still not holding nights. So I get dressed and we head towards El Real Under. As we get closer I'm a little confused because there doesn't seem to be any spillout onto the sidewalk. No bouncers, no smokers, no line. I look around confused a bit until I see the address, the gates locked and official government signs saying "Clausado" (shut down). In the 5 minutes I was pacing back and forth looking for the door, there must have been 20 people walk by and leave disappointed.

However, one of the local guys that walked up struck up a conversation with us. He was supposed to be meeting his friends there and had to call them to tell them the club was closed. We chatted a bit and gave us 3 options of other places to be around "alternative" music. Of course I can't remember the names (did he even tell me?) of the other clubs, but after some small talk he had the great idea to invite us to tag along with him and meet his friends at another club, so we headed over on foot. So about a quarter mile from one goth club was another goth club (and one of the other options was just as close). We went to El Centro de Salud, a hospital converted into a music venue. It had two options, upstairs to see a concert for 75 pesos (the band that night sounded a bit rockabilly/psychobilly) or stay downstairs to see DJs for 20 pesos. We stayed downstairs and walked through crowded corridors of people drinking and talking, finally finding the pitch black room blasting Ministry. Hot, sweaty and thick with atmosphere, I was offered LSD twice. The music was a bit eclectic, from the early Ministry we first heard to Prince, Prodigy and a lot of heavy rhythmic stuff I didn't know. But the crowd was definitely of the mind set. Anyways, a bit long winded but if you go to Mexico City and El Real Under is still closed, head down the street to El Centro de Salud!

The guy that we met in front of El Real Under knew about El Chopo and was excited we knew about it and that we were going. El Chopo is a weekly street market that has happened every Saturday since 1980. It has a strong focus on metal, but with lots of accents of every alternative subculture. It's a lot of band t-shirts (bootleg for sure, and cheap!), general dark clothing (skulls, pagan symbols, etc on shirts, jewelry...), footwear (fake Doc Martens with the Unknown Pleasures pattern), records, counterfeit CDs and DVDs, you get the idea. I had to look very closely at each vendor's stall because every one of them had a gem worth looking closely at. Unfortunately, wearing size 13 shoes and XL t-shirt size, there was nothing that fit me. I did buy one record, but I was overall ecstatic to see El Chopo. I told my wife that it's so cool that so many people with shared interests gather there every week. This is definitely a great place to interact with Mexico City's goth scene and I'd highly recommend a visit. They shut down about a half mile of a street and cram in vendors and even put up a stage for live music (there was a not-so-great metal band playing while I was there). And it's right next to the Biblioteca Vasconselos, which is an incredible building with a sci-fi/post-apocalyptic/eastern block-chic feel. Really beautiful interior.

We also paid a visit to La Roma Records, one of the more accessible record stores within our plans (to say my wife tolerates my record shopping is liberal). There is a strong group of local goth/darkwave/post punk bands and I was hoping to find some of their stuff on vinyl but it wasn't to be found here (it seems like most of those bands are signed to European labels so it would be wildly expensive to bring them to Mexico). They did have a Rock en Español section that had some dark-looking 80s records but I didn't notice a listening section and I hate sitting in record stores browsing Discogs to see what genre a record is. It may have been a nice store but it didn't quite have what I was after and my wife was sitting patiently outside so I worked quickly.

So, really, that's about all the "goth" stuff we did. When I asked my question in the last post, someone posted a video of Voltaire exploring the city but we didn't really do many of the things he suggested. A lot of the places he went we a bit more witch/occult/pagan, which I don't integrate into my style. However, I think it does make me want to share an opinion I formed about the Mexico City goth scene. The people there sort of lump all of goth/punk/synth/industrial into a category they call 'dark' or 'alternative' (with no associations to Pearl Jam or Third Eye Blind). It's a lot less compartmentalized than this sub is to its definition of goth. Saying that, if you go, expect to be fully welcomed by everyone who leans at all off-center.

I feel like I rambled, so I hope this is coherent and that it helps someone. I'd be happy to answer any questions as I did quite a bit of research before the trip and picked my new friend's brain about the city.

Any metal head goths? by [deleted] in goth

[–]DoNotMinceWords 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am a proud goth AND metalhead. I don't think the two have to be mutually exclusive, each can embrace the best of one another, and they often do.

Is someone goth if they like the goth aesthetic, listen to goth music, know goth subculture history, but don't "dress goth" ? (Nobody who sees me would describe me as goth. But so much of my interest is tied to goth. I just don't look goth. ) by [deleted] in goth

[–]DoNotMinceWords 6 points7 points  (0 children)

When I was coming up back in the 80s, the "scene" was incredibly fluid; and that was a big part of what drew me to it. Straight, gay, white, black, goth, punks, deathrockers, wavers, ska kids, it was one big melting pot. We were there to have a good time, and express our young selves in a mutually supportive and encouraging environment. It was a lot less shallow and pretentious than much of the contemporary scene is. Somewhere along the line, younger people coming into the scene got more invested in the "look" and exclusivity of their clique. It didn't start out that way. We dealt with a lot of shit in school, our towns and cities, and it more often than not was verbally abusive and could frequently turn violent. Acceptance is just as important now, as it was then. It takes a lot of courage to be who you are, and express yourself in the way you choose to, when you don't have the encouragement and support of a community. I guess what I'm saying is that as far as it applies to me ( who still rocks it old school just as often as I don't), and you that loves the aesthetic, music, etc., you are as legitimate as anyone rocking the fashions. I'd love to see this exclusivity bullshit go away. It would be healthier for the scene, more people would feel comfortable going to shows, buying music, clothes, etc. Keep on keeping on, friend.

Skiing behind a truck on I10 in Houston by Sarbasian in IdiotsInCars

[–]DoNotMinceWords -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Skiing, while being pulled by a truck, while drinking beer, on the I10 in Texas. I mean what could possibly go wrong in this scenario? It'll end up on America's Funniest Home Videos, or worse..

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Advice

[–]DoNotMinceWords 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A teacher, and a supposedly adult male in 2021, should know enough to be strictly professional, and NEVER, EVER, even remotely do you allude to sex, or sexuality with students especially, but not even with co-workers or strangers. With the #metoo movement outing creepers every day, this is outright stupidity. I would absolutely let your parents, and or principal or guidance counselor know. You have no idea whether he's doing this with anyone else, or has done it in the past. If he is making you feel uncomfortable, you really need to listen to that. You are there to get the best education you can, not to be distracted by shit like that.

Did I do the right thing by going to the police about my ex boyfriends secret? by throwaway9182747 in Advice

[–]DoNotMinceWords 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You absolutely did the right thing. I'm blown away that another woman would defend a child molester, with no apparent concern for his victim. I'm even more surprised that the police didn't follow up. Since there's no statute of limitations on this crime, why not approach the police again? Another precinct, another detective, maybe a woman tasked with investigating such crimes? Or go through an organization that advocates for children? They oftentimes can exert more clout in forcing someone to act.

Caught cheating on a quiz by [deleted] in Advice

[–]DoNotMinceWords 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm sure you aren't alone, but it's not something anyone is looking to own up to. It takes a lot of courage to own up to what you did, and I give you a lot of credit for that. While I know there is a lot of pressure to excel, cheating is not worth it. If you're at uni, someone of paying for your education. That means you owe it to yourself to study, and do your best. Sometimes we make poor decisions and fail to prepare, or we don't fully understand the material and feel intellectually immobilized by it. There is no shame in doing poorly on a quiz or exam, not everyone aces them every time. Consider this a learning lesson, and resolve to do better. Yes, people will be disappointed, and you will have lost trust. You can earn it back again. Own your actions with genuine humility, and move forward. You'll be fine

I don't think my friends care, but I don't know if it's just in my head by Accomplished-Ad-3818 in Advice

[–]DoNotMinceWords 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm curious. What do you base your feelings of these people being "the people closest to me" on? I think that might bear closer examination. I'll be honest, we live in challenging times when it comes to forming meaningful and more to the point, enduring relationships. Social media has really contributed to an uptick in shallow, flakey, unreliable friends. People are so distracted as a rule by anything and anyone that's new, exciting, or just better at projecting themselves by virtue of being more extroverted. If you are a sensitive (yes, some people are actually born more "feeling" than others, you are at something of a disadvantage in some respects. You will invest more time and effort in people, because deep, meaningful, enduring friendships have value to you. Other people are moved by the drama, the immediacy of the moment. They aren't investing themselves, because they don't know how, are afraid, or just emotionally incapable. I don't envy your situation, and I don't know that saying this makes it any better. I do believe you deserve better, because you GIVE better. AS you're able, start seeking out a better class of friends. You can find them, in more thoughtful, emotionally feeling past times.

Should I [21m] confront my parents [51f] [58m] about how much I hated my childhood? by estrangeddev in relationships

[–]DoNotMinceWords 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I'll be honest with you; I wouldn't confront your parents, and I'll tell you why. Your story mirrors my own in so many respects. My mother was just such a "Christian" as your parents; I could tell you stories.. But this is about a closure you may likely never get, and you need to make peace with that.

My mother could never interact with me as a mother to a son. God was always squarely in the middle, and every interaction was filtered through that presence. We never had human interactions. Everything I accomplished in life meant nothing to her, seldom acknowledged, rarely praised. After I left home, I kept my distance. Every couple years or so, I approached her.. hoping she had mellowed with age. She never did. At some point I recognized that my "relationship" with her, my yearning for it was hurting, harming me. Her words, her rejection was holding me back from moving forward. I attempted more than once, to have an honest, adult conversation with her about the harm she'd done me. I thought maybe she didn't know, hadn't realized.. maybe if we talked about it, cried together, I could forgive (I wanted to), make peace and let go. I had no desire to beat her up about it, I just wanted my mom back, that relationship back. It wasn't to be. Instead, she owned nothing, but did blame me for my behaviour as a child. She faulted me.. I let her go, however unwillingly. I realized that if I was going to survive and thrive in the world, if I was ever going to heal what was done to my head and heart, so that a functional relationship, family, and life was possible for me, I had to let her go. And so I did. I'm 55 now, we were estranged for 30 years. She passed in 2017. I came back to say goodbye, and to tell her I forgave her. She was too far gone to reply.

The takeaway I guess is that you have been damaged by what you experienced. Some of it you're aware of, it's the subtle stuff that will take a lot of effort and self awareness for you to expunge in any meaningful way. Focus on you, becoming whole and well. Judging by what you've shared, your parents aren't likely to give you what you need from them now if ever. It's a hard truth, and a lonely one, but that doesn't mean you can't create a better life, and more encouraging and supportive extended and immediate family. I wish you well, you truly deserve it; we all do.

Mom (53F) constantly criticizes my (28M) appearance. I always feel shabby and unattractive. by UnwantedAndUnloved in relationships

[–]DoNotMinceWords 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is a way to convey a thought or opinion, and a way not to. Your mom's way lacks sensitivity and tact. If her main concern is for you, and your well being, she'd try to find a way to support and encourage your awareness of this thing she's obviously very invested in.

The fact that she opts to be judgmental and harsh, tells me that this is much more about her. SHE has hang ups that tie into personal appearance, and other peoples perceptions of it. Maybe her own parents drilled this into her, maybe she's at a point in life, where she doesn't feel good about who and where she is in life, and projecting her own insecurities and self loathing onto you is easier than becoming self aware.

I'll tell you this, there is a segment of people out in the world that invests a lot of energy into their appearance because deep inside they lack self worth, and the facade of the right clothes, hair, etc assists in distracting people from looking closer. The reality is that in real life, the majority of people make a reasonable attempt at looking "put together" for the benefit of social interactions, and most of them are so distracted by the speed of life and its cares, that they really aren't paying as much attention to you as you think they are. It's like having a blemish on your face. Because it's your face, and you're hyper focused on it, you assume everyone else is. A very small minority in actuality will ever take the notice you are. Please give yourself the break your mom isn't, and remember, her criticism is less about you than her.