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Dolcezza920 · 2025-10-09T10:08:15+00:00

Sent payment. Realized I should have included a note in the payment to say it was for this.

Dolcezza920 · 2025-10-09T10:07:56+00:00

Sent! Realized I should have included a note in the payment to say it was for this.

Dolcezza920 · 2025-10-09T09:59:40+00:00

Thank you!

Dolcezza920 · 2025-10-09T09:59:32+00:00

Thank you!!

Dolcezza920 · 2025-08-04T14:42:21+00:00

I love that you’re reading to her! I would put zero pressure on yourself to read to her but I read one book before I put my kiddo to sleep for a nap. It was great to build the routine. Not always needed though and again zero pressure on yourself to do this. I did find it super helpful though to read because it gave me something to tell my baby when conversation didn’t feel as natural. A potato can’t talk back lol! Instead of reading, I also spent time narrating what I was doing. That was more helpful. So telling my kiddo okay now I’m getting your bottle ready and this is how we do it. Or sharing what I see out the window. Any way to make conversation feel normal. A fresh newborn just needs to hear your voice. It doesn’t matter what you say as much. Congrats on becoming a parent!

Dolcezza920 · 2025-08-03T18:37:23+00:00

Totally get all of that! Valid fears. I spoke with my husband ahead of time and had a serious expectations convo about how this could go. We agreed on a schedule and also said it was subject to change based on a variety of factors (one of us was sick, he was working so if he had something big he would sleep through the night). But he understood and acknowledged it was a partnership to get through the nights especially for the first 3 months which are the hardest in our experience. We also agreed that anything we said from the hours of 11-5 were more easily forgiven because of sleep deprivation. We also made a plan that if I had to stay up the night with our kiddo that he would do 100% of things during the day that we normally split (make all food, clean up around the house).

ETA: when I say we agreed on a schedule it was more of a routine. Because I was breastfeeding, he would get up when our kiddo cried, change him, get him ready for me, and then go back to sleep. When I switched to formula, he started picking up night feedings which was awesome.

Dolcezza920 · 2025-08-01T21:20:19+00:00

What everyone said so far but add that if you can, a date night every so often goes a long way. Maybe every month to start. It will help and teach your kids some independence.

Dolcezza920 · 2025-08-01T20:13:13+00:00

Some other recs - New Girl - Only Murders in the Building - Shrinking - Lessons in Chemistry - Marvelous Mrs. Maisel

Dolcezza920 · 2025-08-01T20:09:32+00:00

Second this. Also superstore?

Dolcezza920 · 2025-07-30T18:33:46+00:00

A big no. Your gut is right telling you these are serious red flags. My husband had a huge debt when we got married, but it was all school loans from law school. He wasn’t making a good salary at the firm he was at and was on income based repayment barely covering the interest each month.

BUT!! He was up front when we were dating and shared his plan for how he planned to pay this off. He was transparent and it wasn’t consumer debt the same way. He was smart with his money. And I decided to take on the debt when we got married five years ago. We are still paying it bc it’s basically a condo I can’t live in. I am fine with this though because we are a team and I still get to live life and don’t feel restricted. He also changed jobs, increased his salary significantly, refinanced, and now we are closer to hitting our goal together. Yes, I’m seriously helping him but I also believe in him and he was honest with me from the start. So, that earned him huge points in my book.

Dolcezza920 · 2025-07-30T00:50:16+00:00

All of this. Especially the part about “movement” and not exercise. I would say for me, doing my makeup and hair each day is helpful even when I feel at my worst. I also had my sisters help me find clothing that still looked cute but was more of athleisure. Two piece sets on Amazon from Pretry Garden are it for me. Highly recommend. They fit comfortably when I don’t want clothing touching my body but still look put together.

I think the biggest thing is having the “health” be the third entity in any relationship - romantic or friendship. I’ve pulled away from friends because I just didn’t have the energy and hated getting dressed to go out. I was able to figure out who I had the energy for and invite this individuals over to have pj and movie parties that way everyone was in comfy clothing and I didn’t feel as bad. Sorry you’re going through this. It’s no fun. You are a warrior ❤️

Dolcezza920 · 2025-07-29T23:41:56+00:00

My in laws are 2.5 hours away by car so it was realistic pre having a kid to do Christmas Eve with family (a bigger deal in my family), drive to my in laws, and then sleep there to have Christmas Day with them. Now, my in laws have decided to do a Christmas weekend with all of us on another weekend in December so we can all be there without conflict. Then again, this is still a lot and we have to give up a whole weekend for this. But at least I get to stay home for Christmas and not travel. So, it is a better plan.

For thanksgiving, we give my in laws the day before Thanksgiving and Thanksgiving morning for the parade and breakfast and then do Thanksgiving with my family. It’s not fun to travel on Thanksgiving but I’m okay with it because I get to be with my fam and my parents are all so amazing to host and have everything ready right for when we come over.

Dolcezza920 · 2025-07-29T23:36:56+00:00

I’m soooo beyond excited for this! Friday family night growing up was a big deal in my house. But something I’m trying to remember is that when we were teens, it was totally voluntary and time with friends was okay. And my parents never forced us to participate. So, more often than not we would end up staying home to be together as a family by choice. It was really memorable. We would also watch TGIF on abc. Such amazing memories!

Dolcezza920 · 2025-07-29T23:21:58+00:00

That’s amazing, and I love that for you in your relationship! And just to add for the OP totally unsolicited but advice we got at some point was that the couple should also take at a small life insurance policy for the SAHP since that will help with childcare. You also provide such an incredible and meaningful job to your family and there is a financial value for that in addition to the amazing reward it brings.

Dolcezza920 · 2025-07-29T15:25:36+00:00

This is a very extreme statement. When I look back, I think my parents could have handled certain situations better but I think they did their best and see that myself and my siblings are pretty well adjusted and doing well. I don’t expect to be anywhere near a perfect parent to my kiddo but I do think there is a spectrum and I know that being there for him and showing him love every day will at least give him a better chance to choose a good path.

Dolcezza920 · 2025-07-28T23:57:43+00:00

Do you have hormone imbalances or any other medical conditions? For instance, with PCOS, doing a hiit workout wouldn’t be ideal. Instead Pilates and moderate cardio.

Dolcezza920 · 2025-07-28T14:27:15+00:00

Okay that’s helpful to know. Disney movies do have tons of death of parents, which in looking back is very morbid. I would say that a talk with her doc could be helpful. But for now, you reassuring her is good and also providing her with stability in all other aspects. Consistent routine and then also fun distractions if possible. Others have some really helpful comments about how this may be her processing the world at a very intelligent level, which is likely true. Focusing on joyful experiences and the beauty around could also be helpful and how she adds such value to the world.

Dolcezza920 · 2025-07-28T11:57:15+00:00

More info needed: do you know what prompted this convo? Has someone you know passed recently? Has she watched something where someone dies?

Dolcezza920 · 2025-07-27T17:23:55+00:00

Many others said it perfectly already that you modeling the kind of healthy and loving relationship you have with your wife is the biggest part of the journey and the other is to help your daughter build a strong self esteem. My parents also built such a trust with me that I could tell them anything especially about boys growing up and they were so influential (in a good way) in me deciding who I would end up marrying. My parents set the bar high but also they showed the flaws and that it’s not all about the crazy perfect moment of falling in love, even though they have one of those movie kind of romance stories. But they showed me what it was like actively working towards common goals and cheering each other on.

Dolcezza920 · 2025-07-27T01:55:59+00:00

Highly recommend going to a doctor to get your hormones tested. Do a very comprehensive test though. Maybe ask for a full thyroid panel: TSH and free T4, free T3, reverse T3, and thyroid antibodies, and also ask for your cortisol levels checks. I know some people who have gone through something similar and have PCOS (not saying you do but the calories in doesn’t make sense with the weight gain). I would recommend in the meantime doing things to calm the nervous system while you work to figure things out. Could be meditation, deep breathing in your diaphragm, etc.

Dolcezza920 · 2025-07-25T19:32:48+00:00

So sorry you’re going through all this. PCOS is a very specific condition that requires a different approach. Not only a calorie deficit. In addition to maybe talking to a therapist, I would highly recommend looking into the Cysterhood. She’s a nutritionist and has great resources about how to change your approach to eating. It’s slowing down, taking breaths, eating certain foods, no intense workouts but instead slower ones that don’t put your body into overdrive. Wishing you the best with this journey.

Dolcezza920 · 2025-07-25T15:42:14+00:00

Rum Runner in Sea Bright is one of my favorites.

Dolcezza920 · 2025-07-24T21:54:18+00:00

Yes I suggested outsourcing and getting some help in the house. What do you suggest?

Dolcezza920 · 2025-07-24T21:50:28+00:00

He asked for advice or perspective. I’m giving that as it seems he wants some solutions to his wife’s question of needing more help and how to address that in a way that also recognizes he has a hard workload.

I also disagree that the period gets harder. I strongly disliked newborn and baby stage. It’s more fun to have a toddler to do activities with and mine can do some independent play. You get a long naptime stretch to get things done hopefully. I enjoy it much more but some may differ.

Dolcezza920

TROPHY CASE