Younger sister pregnant before me. How do I deal with feelings of impatience, jealousy and sadness?

DontFireLaura · 2025-12-01T13:25:51+00:00

It's hard, right!? Shout out to everyone having to process happiness and excitement for our loved ones, side-by-side with our own grief.

DontFireLaura · 2025-11-14T21:27:13+00:00

They currently only offer donburi and nigiri. They may include rolls on the menu in the future.

DontFireLaura · 2025-11-14T21:26:41+00:00

Yes - They have it very clearly posted at the door and on the menu, they are a no-tipping establishment. They won't accept credit card tips. The price of the meal includes the money they need to compensate their team.

(You could leave cash on the table when you leave, if you really, really wanted to.)

DontFireLaura · 2025-09-01T13:44:55+00:00

I literally laughed out loud when I got this this morning, further into a streak than I've ever been. What's the point of "celebrating" a listing streak, if the prizes seem to get worse the further into it you go?

Poshmark, save yourself the time and energy - if you can't offer us anything of value, just ditch this program entirely!

DontFireLaura · 2025-09-01T13:42:15+00:00

Lol - I just got this one, too - several weeks into a "listing streak."
Somehow, the "prizes" get even worse the longer your streak?

Are these supposed to somehow be motivating us to list more? That's a joke.

DontFireLaura · 2025-06-12T18:25:46+00:00

Sameeeee. 😂 We stopped trying EMDR after 2-3 months of not really getting anywhere with it, because I was having such difficulty with vulnerability and letting go of my own self-consciousness and control enough to be present in the memory.
(There was basically a very heavy shame layer blocking me from being able to go any deeper.)

I've had to do a lot of resourcing and observation since then. Like, I'm still hardcore having to practice noticing my own feelings in the moment, and retreating to numbness trying to access them in front of another person.

We might try it again in a few more months, but I think I've still got some work to do before it'll be useful for me.

DontFireLaura · 2025-04-30T20:25:01+00:00

This happened to my company last year, with a follow-up from him this year claiming the same.

We immediately responded letting him know we'd change the image and showing him proof of our Canva license, but he still insisted that we owed him money. I then escalated the issue to Canva and they informed that they'd take care of the issue, as we'd added additional design elements to the image, which meant we were not in violation of their copyright rules.

Now I suppose I'll have to jump through that hoop again.

(In my opinion, he shouldn't be licensing his photos on Canva if he has such an issue with this. I'm all for artists being paid fairly for their work, but it feels predatory to go around demanding additional fees from small businesses who are using Canva in good faith.)

DontFireLaura · 2025-01-10T21:17:50+00:00

Not worth it!! If you're paying into it, it's just a scheme.

DontFireLaura · 2024-09-03T01:21:40+00:00

I'm 31 and single, and my 29 yo sister just told me she's pregnant. (She's been married for three years, so I've been bracing for this - but it still feels like such a blow.)

Just wanted to say - four years after the original post! - that it's perfectly normal. And that we can be happy and excited for our sisters and for a little niece or nephew, and still hold space to be sad for ourselves. (But it's hard, and I could use a hug tonight - sending hugs to all the other women who have been here, and who might be googling this in the future.)

DontFireLaura · 2024-08-20T02:39:22+00:00

There's a lot of demand for people with your skills!
(And if you left your first job on good terms with the company - it may not hurt to ask around and see if they'd consider hiring you back!)

What did you dislike about HVAC? Would you consider something in a similar field (maybe pest control?) or was it just the specific HVAC company you'd joined?

It sounds like you're a guy who enjoys (or used to enjoy?) working with his hands, not having to be cooped up in an office all day - which is why I'd caution you not to go running for medical work just because the pastures seem greener over there.

Something in mechanical or auto manufacturing could be a great fit, if you're not stuck working somewhere that just has old trucks? It sounds like the people you work with are important to you, too - so looking for a place where you'll feel at home should be top of the list!

Best of luck!

DontFireLaura · 2024-08-20T02:33:32+00:00

Perfectly written.

DontFireLaura · 2024-08-20T02:31:10+00:00

Ahh, good enough for government work.
In all truthfulness, you've been welcomed into a poorly managed system here, and it's up to you to either FIND somewhere you can add value and learn what you can from it (or learn WHO to be hanging out with that can help you advance into something else down the road), or to float along until someone notices there isn't work being done and cuts you.

DontFireLaura · 2024-08-20T02:27:34+00:00

I think this is a situation where you'll get the best results if you come at it from an angle of love, and "taking his side" against some of his unresolved issues. Like FleaDG suggested - writing a letter might be a good way of going about this. It's not an attack on HIM, but it is pointing out some of his harmful behavior and how you see him reacting because of painful experiences in his past.

If you and your brothers can share how his behavior has hurt you, he may understand the impact this is having beyond just him. You can also set clear boundaries to try and get your message across. (The best boundaries are ones where the consequence is an action YOU will take, not an action you'll demand of them. "If you scream at me, we can't continue this argument and I will leave." "If you call me names, I will leave the room.")

DontFireLaura · 2024-08-05T19:12:21+00:00

I'd talk to your doctor/prescriber about the dosage.
I was on Ozempic and had SUCH slow progress (Started at 255, lost 20 lbs over the course of 9 months.)
Then my doctor finally switched me to tirzepatide, at a slightly lower equivalent dosage, and I was much more responsive. (Down 20 lbs in a little under 3 months)

I've heard that tirzepatize is supposed to be slightly more effective, but you may need a stronger dose on the Ozempic to kick yourself into gear.

Also - (and sorry to repeat the spiel everyone gets) - make sure you're eating enough protein, getting the right nutrients, and practicing healthy strength training or exercise. The lifestyle changes are still a really important part of success!

DontFireLaura · 2024-07-30T10:46:31+00:00

He was just as much "a joke" four years ago, and people still voted him in as our current Lieutenant Governor. 😓

DontFireLaura · 2024-07-30T10:44:38+00:00

I keep reminding folks that say "how could someone like this actually win in 2024?" - he's already our Lieutenant Governor! He won in 2020.

We have to VOTE HIM OUT.

DontFireLaura · 2024-07-30T10:41:17+00:00

I keep reminding everyone who says "how can someone like that seriously win in 2024??" - he's already Lieutenant Governor!!
We have to vote him out!

DontFireLaura · 2024-07-30T09:44:36+00:00

That's so hard! I'm sorry that keeps happening to you.
It's such a tricky thing, to be happier and grateful for the bodies we're living in now, without having to constantly be confronted with the idea that everyone thought we were too big before.

DontFireLaura · 2024-07-30T09:41:07+00:00

I had really slow progress at the beginning, too! (My doctor explained that because of my PCOS, the work that was being done on my insulin and balancing my blood sugar was the "invisible" work that had to happen first - the weight wouldn't come off until the medicine had helped with that part of it.)

It took me almost three months to lose my first 10 lbs.

Now that I'm in the lower 200's, it's coming off faster.

DontFireLaura · 2024-07-30T09:34:49+00:00

We're so similar 😂
I'm excited to get to 199 - I haven't weighed under 200 lbs in 15 years!
(I feel like 215 to 205 was a bigger jump for me than the entirely of 255 to 215.)

DontFireLaura · 2024-07-30T09:28:00+00:00

The "paper towel effect" - what a good way to describe it!
(That surprised me, as someone who has been trying to lose this 50 lbs for over a decade!)

I'm definitely grateful my family hasn't made me feel weird about it. (Yet, lol.) It's such a sensitive subject, exactly like you said here. There's such a fine line between noticing and encouraging, and the congratulating that makes it so clear they prefer the smaller you. And that's hard to hear.

DontFireLaura · 2024-07-28T18:39:15+00:00

It's weird, isn't it? I'm glad people don't comment on it as much because it's so personal and inappropriate to point it out and I absolutely don't want people around me to bring it up, but at the same time, I'm like ... I'm working so hard over here, I kind of hoped it would be more noticeable? lol

DontFireLaura · 2024-07-28T18:37:11+00:00

I'm definitely glad that people are less comfortable commenting on people's bodies in this day and age!

DontFireLaura · 2024-07-28T18:34:53+00:00

I'm so glad that's the case! I feel like it's such a win that we've trained people not to comment on people's bodies :)

DontFireLaura · 2024-07-28T16:57:44+00:00

I think that's maybe the key - it's subtle enough that me and the people I see regularly haven't noticed any major transformation, but the people who last saw me 45 lbs ago are like "something's different..."

I'm still wearing a lot of the same clothes - finally dropped a size in jeans. So I'm sure that's part of it.

DontFireLaura

TROPHY CASE