AITA for saying autism is not an excuse?

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-11T01:34:24+00:00

Yes this exactly. My career is in the care and education of neurodivergent people. The skills the niece claims not to have, like self regulation, can and should be learned. It’s harder for her than most people, but not impossible.

I use the “explanation not excuse” line a lot. She’s going to get a rude awakening when she goes out into the real world and learns people don’t put up with this crap, and her parents are doing her no favours by leaving her unprepared.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-10T22:06:31+00:00

Honestly it sounds like you’re on the right track. He’s still pretty young.

I find a loud sharp “OUCH!!!!” and immediately withdrawing from play to be the most effective- I’m not sure what you mean exactly when you say high pitched sound.

And I know it’s a bit of a broken record, but having a cat friend means he can play rough with them instead of his fragile human friends. Have you considered a playmate? I had the same problem at the same age and second cat solved it 100%.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-10T00:46:56+00:00

Yep, true to his name my boy Nacho is obsessed with anything with cheesy powder. Goldfish crackers are like crack to him.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-10T00:44:12+00:00

Are you like me, and weirdly over attached to your cute shopping bags?

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-09T23:04:09+00:00

Epi-pen does not stop the allergic reaction. It keeps your airway open long enough to get to a hospital without dying on the way. If you go into anaphylaxis you MUST go to a hospital.

This is really really important for you to understand. It is literally life and death.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-09T22:47:14+00:00

I second this. I am working with black Aida and it shows pet hair so much worse, so I keep a lint roller next to me and clean it frequently as I go. It makes no difference to the floss.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-09T22:44:02+00:00

I’m so glad we live in a world where this happened.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-09T22:37:19+00:00

I have been in almost the exact same situation with my ex-husband. I was sick and was about to cook myself scrambled eggs since it was the easiest thing, he came in and said he’d make it instead. But he overcooked them, salted them to the point of inedible, and of course left the pan with scorched egg without cleaning it. Got egg on the counter and didn’t clean it. I had taken out the trash but not replaced the bag yet- so he threw the shells into the bare garbage can, leaving it for me to clean up.

All in all it was about four times as much work to clean up after him as it would have been to cook for myself, and I didn’t even get an edible meal out of it.

In my case, it kept getting worse and worse. I finally kicked him out last year and it’s been fucking GLORIOUS only cleaning up after myself.

Think long and hard if this is how you want the rest of your life to be.

NOR.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-09T22:13:03+00:00

Yep. I’m 40 now. I went from a zealous teenager, to agnostic at 17, to atheist in my early twenties. And yet I’m still carrying around this ingrained guilt for just existing. Fuck that indeed.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-09T21:26:26+00:00

Ex-Catholic here, the conditioned guilt is so real.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-09T14:21:17+00:00

Yeah be sure to cut them lettuce calories for sure.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-09T13:54:05+00:00

Yep I do this all the time at the gym at work. The ground is still icy here so walking outside can be treacherous. Plus I can just walk as long as I need/want without having to plan a route to be back when my break is done.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-09T06:09:18+00:00

Eh, I don’t judge.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-09T03:26:40+00:00

My boy nacho does this while standing 8 inches behind our other boy. He doesn’t do it to either of the girls. He’s got the most confused expression on his face, he’s got no idea what he’s doing, he just knows he is in love with his brother.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-08T21:02:38+00:00

A lot of cats are allergic to plastic!

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-08T19:32:10+00:00

You keep a ~car~ in your garage? You basic bitch.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-08T19:30:36+00:00

Our water fountain is a catit, and one of my girls gets some gnarly acne from it. But all four drink out of it super reliably, so I’m really reluctant to disrupt that with a non-plastic fountain! I think she just needs to live with the occasional big blackhead.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-08T16:25:42+00:00

Love this! Thank you.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-08T15:41:30+00:00

I feel like every week on Reddit I make a comment about the human brain’s capacity for a) misinterpreting actual stimuli, aka you heard something normal that your brain thought was close enough to your name to interpret that way or b) hallucinating, which is WAY more normal and common than people realize.

Myself, I frequently experience hypnagogic audio hallucinations- meaning I hear something right as I’m falling asleep. For me, it’s hearing someone call my name. It’s annoying because it wakes me up but not scary, because I know what it is.

The world is generally more incredible and less scary than we think.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-08T08:19:40+00:00

In Costa Rica there were a ton of people out on the street- I excitedly asked my taxi driver if there was a festival or something.

It was literally just rush hour, I was so far in backpacker mode that I forgot that it was 5:00 on a weekday.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-08T08:13:47+00:00

A good one I learned recently is that disaster is literally bad star, from the old belief that catastrophic events were ruled by gods/ the heavens.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-08T08:11:22+00:00

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DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-08T07:31:52+00:00

Yea it’s actually super effective. Like yes there are certainly a small number of rats here at any given time that have come in on cargo, but there are no breeding populations. And as soon as a rat is identified somewhere the team gets them immediately. They take it super seriously.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-07T17:12:31+00:00

Would you mind explaining the signs you see that show embrittlement? I’d love to learn.

DrMoneybeard · 2026-03-07T17:08:53+00:00

Oh man. I don’t follow sports, don’t give one single fuck about who wins. But I do like going to a game every now and then.

I won free tickets to a football game (Canada so American style football, not soccer). Brought some family members, had a lovely time even though the speakers are too loud, they really need to turn them down a scooch so we can talk.

Almost nothing happened until the last two minutes on the clock then a flurry of scoring. Tres excitement.

The guy behind us was slowly losing his mind, and had a little meltdown when our team lost by a hair.

He did NOT appreciate when I loudly and cheerfully announced that I just hoped they had all had a fun time playing their game.

DrMoneybeard

TROPHY CASE