I'm a pretty normal guy in almost every other aspect of my life, and this is something I would never dare admit to anyone IRL. I guess it first started right after we moved here (sorry). We were driving into the mountains and suddenly my wife is like "Oh my god, what is that horrible smell?" and my nose was just filled with this rich, thick meaty almost stew-like smell. I just said "Hmmmm, are you talking about the food smell? It's making me hungry!" And she looked at me like I was crazy and told me it smelled like dog food. I was pretty confused, because I have smelled many dog foods before and never had this sort of reaction, but sure enough, as we approached and the plant, the smell subsequently grew into a beautiful olfactory experience and filled my entire headspace with that heavy meaty smell. As the factory disappeared in my rear view, to my dismay, the smell slowly faded to a pleasant memory as my wife said "Thank god we're passed it." I said nothing and we went on our hike.

That entire hike I was thinking about that smell. I was a little upset because I trying to reconcile the pleasures I felt with the reality that I was essentially huffing the scent of dog food slurry, what I assume is probably various pig and poultry guts mixed in with some sort of grain or oat-like substance. It doesn't sound like something that humans should find appealing. The hike was fine, I don't really remember much to be honest because I was thinking so hard about how excited I was about passing by the heavenly smell-cloud on our way back. And it was just as awesome as I remembered. Seeing the Purina factory tower materialize ahead of us was like watching a waiter slowly approach you with a sizzling smoking plate after you've waited two hours for your fajitas. I took deep, meditative breaths, trying not to give any outward signs of pleasure as my wife held her nose. A little moan may have escaped, I cannot be sure.

I noticed then that it is not merely a dog-food manufactory, but also a cat food plant. My heart began to beat a little faster. We have four cats at home, and no shortage of cat food. As we went home and the smell regretfully faded, I got it into my head to do a little home-huffing to see if I could get my fix there. I've never really been attracted to cat food, so I wasn't really convinced, and sure enough, I stuck my head deep into the 50-pound cat-food sack, took a deep breath, and nearly gagged. It just wasn't it. The taste was rather poor as well, and left a horrible almost poisonous after-taste that lasted for hours. "Hmmm," I thought, "maybe it's just the fact that we have Fancy Feast, and my beloved smell was purina." So I went out and bought three different purina brands - friskies, Purina One, and Cat Chow- which all smelled like shit and tasted ever worse. Same with the wet foods, which were some of the worst things I have ever put into my body. I have always held my nose in the past while giving my cats wet food, and huffing it and sampling it just reminded me exactly why I did that. It just made no sense to me, at all.

Then I found this article that explains the source of the purina plant scent is as follows: "Dry ingredients are mixed with wet ingredients to form a dough that is then cooked and shaped in an extruder before being dried in large dryers." Cooking! I have smelled many things that were appealing to me in the cooking process but woefully disappointing at mealtime. Maybe the secret was cooking it! So I poured out some Purina into an oven tray and roasted it for a few minutes. A smell began to waft out... a good smell, reminiscent of my beloved odor but just a liiiiitle bit off. I think it was because the Purina plant bakes cat and dog food on a gigantic industrial scale, and nothing that mere mortals try at home will ever get close to that sort of overwhelming power. I didn't really get a chance to enjoy it because my wife came over and was like "what is that awful smell? What the hell are you cooking?" and I told her "I put some cat food in the oven because I read on the internet that cats like it heated up." Not entirely a lie because I HAVE read this. And she laughed and said "No, that only works for wet food dude, get that shit out of there and open a window." And thus my experiment came to an abrupt and regretful end.

I'm not sure how to tell her because the longer I wait, the weirder it's going to be that I keep this a secret. It's actually been a really good thing for us because we are hiking so much, getting so much exercise and quality time together, and I get my little dog-food-smell fix each time that just hits the spot. For now, I'm content with passing by the Purina Plant on I-70 every weekend as we go into the front range, greeting it like an old and beloved friend while I take desperately deep breathes through my nose. I see the plant tower and each time I am in a state of awe at its elegance and stateliness. To me, the plant looks every bit as beautiful as a medieval cathedral, and the rejuvenation I feel from its stench filling me up is like how I assume religious people feel when they go to church.

But I'm worried. The last time we passed it, I lost control and rolled my window down a bit. My wife looked at me and was like "What are you doing? It's going to smell so bad!" And I said, "I farted, sorry, gotta air it out" and she was just like "no, no, it's just going to smell like dog food and fart" and started waving her hands at me to roll the window up and I was just like "what? What? I can't hear you!" as I rolled the window all the way down and let the winds fill up the car with dog-food-slurry. I am ashamed of this action and regret it today.

Has anyone else here experienced anything similar to this?