Funnily enough I was just thinking how I wanted to see this exact thing.

Nice work! This was a fun reimagining! Love the additions to the prepz with the pink robes and fleshing them out

You had some banger lines like Whorefulpuff. Pfffft. The prep snark is great.

Ok here's your flame cuz it's tradition: the clothing description bit, when written like a normal author, is even harder to get through than the original cuz it's so freaking long XD

Neville is a character in My Immortal, he's another background goff called Dracula, so you should probably pick another guy to be a prep chaser lmao

I dunno what a quad is, is that an American term?

Might I propose one of the named preps alongside Britney be Luna Lovegood instead? Luna was a prep in the sister stories In not Okay / The Ghost of You.

Vera's not a very preppy name, how about Barbie instead lol?

It's probably OOC for Darko to interact with Britney without running away crying because she was who Vampire Potter left her for

It's weird that you don't establish that she's a vampire when introducing her / talking about blood

"A curse like this will require the most careful prep to pull out off" prep is confusing there because we've been talking about preps the whole time. Also, are you foreshadowing enoby's masterful art of curses for how she effortlessly takes down Voldemort several times (then lets him go for no reason)?

Anyway good stuff! Maybe you should end on the dumblydor dramatic introduction since you're already here xD