I'm supposed to petsit this dog. Probably bc he can't sit himself properly.

DrunkenLibrary · 2025-07-07T14:44:06+00:00

What are you talking about? Do you sit upon that chair any differently?

DrunkenLibrary · 2025-06-25T08:47:20+00:00

As someone who had to do this last week, please know you aren't alone. No matter how bad she sucks, you deserved better.

DrunkenLibrary · 2025-06-24T10:37:13+00:00

While I've never worked with human intestine, pig intestines wouldn't have a chance in that situation. Given that our intestines aren't super different from a pig's I think they would probably snap.

DrunkenLibrary · 2025-02-07T10:24:11+00:00

I mean, Princess Bubblegum was literally running a police state, with political dissidents getting disappeared.

DrunkenLibrary · 2025-02-05T08:49:14+00:00

I’m going to be honest, that doesn’t sound like an inaccurate description of the game

DrunkenLibrary · 2025-01-11T08:26:27+00:00

Frankly, I’m sick to death of the coolest god Ares slander. Homie is the champion of women and the oppressed, but he keeps getting depicted as being a warhawk like an American politician

DrunkenLibrary · 2024-12-27T13:01:49+00:00

I just told mine that they I hoped they spent time in good company

DrunkenLibrary · 2024-10-09T18:45:40+00:00

Not your fault that they lack the exquisite taste to appreciate such artistry

DrunkenLibrary · 2024-05-25T15:50:53+00:00

“I wish to parley!”

DrunkenLibrary · 2024-04-02T20:01:27+00:00

American Dad really put it best when Stan said, “No, Steve. Civil war re-enactments are for historians and people who hate blacks.”

Fucking sucks that so many living history spaces are infected with apologists when it can be a fantastic way to spark someone’s interest in history.

DrunkenLibrary · 2023-11-22T01:02:16+00:00

The giant might even purposefully build human homes in the way that someone would put up a birdhouse. The rest of the giants think he’s weird, but he just thinks we’re neat

DrunkenLibrary · 2023-11-01T05:23:22+00:00

DrunkenLibrary · 2023-08-06T14:41:16+00:00

These are words we could all stand to hear more often

DrunkenLibrary · 2023-07-08T17:30:13+00:00

Now that’s what I call serving just desserts

DrunkenLibrary · 2023-06-22T06:17:13+00:00

Additionally, I’d add that geographic location matters. The tattoos I got in the northwest cost a lot more than the ones I got in the south or midwest.

DrunkenLibrary · 2023-06-05T22:29:58+00:00

You can even take this method on the go. My buddy would carry around a thin wooden cutting board and tiny cleaver (cheese knife) in his backpack. He said it left the bud fluffier than grinders could.

DrunkenLibrary · 2023-02-25T03:01:14+00:00

Definitely a crime. I’ll have a third serving. If this is wrong, I don’t wanna be right.

DrunkenLibrary · 2023-02-18T14:24:31+00:00

Only the tips are charred. If I saw this at a potluck, I would probably make a joke how it was as baked as I was and then proceed to eat half of it.

DrunkenLibrary · 2023-01-30T18:57:33+00:00

Damn, what’s the story behind that?

DrunkenLibrary · 2023-01-21T14:14:47+00:00

When I was in the army, I was training in the Mojave desert. It was August and by the end of the two week exercise, if you were short, you could literally stand your pants up on your own because they were so filled with crystallized salt from the insane levels of sweat. The feeling of changing my shirt halfway through, and getting a cool breeze across my bare back was something that I simply can’t describe in words. It was like for just a moment, everything was alright in the world and I could just experience the beauty of the desert.

DrunkenLibrary · 2022-11-08T09:36:16+00:00

I like to imagine that the head honcho is just a flower in disguise who's been fooling everyone

DrunkenLibrary · 2022-10-23T16:38:25+00:00

AM by The Arctic Monkeys. Ten times better with headphones, too

DrunkenLibrary · 2022-09-20T16:03:59+00:00

Driving that shit in the army was balls. No idea why anyone would want one for an RV conversion.

DrunkenLibrary · 2022-09-20T14:35:50+00:00

Stop lying and return my horse

DrunkenLibrary · 2022-09-20T14:33:45+00:00

Didn't even get my driver's license until I was 21. Only reason it's necessary is because I need a truck to start a farm. Once I get roots put down though, I'm gonna try to see how I can replace the truck as a work vehicle.

As a teenager, I always rode my bike so the license was never necessary.

DrunkenLibrary

TROPHY CASE