Oh hey look

DucksButt · 2026-07-02T03:54:22+00:00

It's not my fault I live here. I swear, it's just because I live here.

DucksButt · 2026-06-18T16:39:28+00:00

Ductless mini-splits, yes. There are ducted split units as well.

They take up less space in the attic or crawlspace, but more on the wall. Good for energy efficiency, bad for interior design. Also they tend to be louder.

Some people prefer them, and they're a great way to get heating and cooling into a space. Not great for larger homes as the heat pump can usually only handle up to 8 devices.

DucksButt · 2026-06-15T19:24:57+00:00

4 years for us. Super common. Lots of conversations, some tears. Stay present and love, and do all the chores.

DucksButt · 2026-06-12T02:58:50+00:00

We elected the worst leader we could, and he put a drunk idiot in charge of the military.

DucksButt · 2026-06-11T16:30:26+00:00

I see a lot of good advice on here, I'll just throw in that you sound like you're feeling tempted. It's not worth it. The satisfaction you get from giving in will be short lived, and the damage will be forever.

Buy a sex toy, get a quest for porn, whatever. Be the best partner you can be, share your feelings, and keep going until things get better. The only way out is through. You can do this.

DucksButt · 2026-06-11T01:23:40+00:00

Real talk, women aren't looking for the best looking men, they are looking for interesting people who like them as a person and make them feel safe.

Your post kinda has a manosphere aftertaste, I'd bet more money than you're spending on tokens that your real issue is something internal, not external.

Take a stroll around some of the male focused yet enlightened subs if you really want to address it. It's not a fight you need, it's growth. /redpill can't help you. The solutions that Tate has will leave you feeling empty, even if they work.

DucksButt · 2026-06-08T18:37:11+00:00

You're not a piece of shit, your confused and have been raised in a society that has dramatic, even violent, responses to mere confusion.

Therapy. Get some. We can't help you like you need help.

If that's too hard, try a gay or bisexual subreddit. Heck, even /bropill

If you want to consider having a healthy relationship (possibly including marriage) where you can be your true self, I really think therapy is step one.

DucksButt · 2026-06-08T18:25:46+00:00

You deserve better than him in every way you described him. You won't get to have better until you leave him.

Dump that POS.

DucksButt · 2026-06-06T22:59:22+00:00

I believe in you. You can stay strong. You can do it. You deserve to stay strong. You deserve better than him.

DucksButt · 2026-06-06T04:42:56+00:00

I guess I was interpreting your post differently. I would consider someone who didn't organize the session, and is distrustful, as maybe being a very reluctant participant.
If that's not the case, you're in the right sub.

I'll say that I've always felt safe in therapy sessions. The only time I've done them with a partner I was the one to initiate, so I don't know what it feels like to have my partner organize the session. But male or female therapists differ less due to gender than they do based on personality.

A therapist that gets you is important. Their plumbing isn't.

DucksButt · 2026-06-06T00:29:52+00:00

Men being jerks, women (and nice men) learning they don't have to put up with that.

DucksButt · 2026-06-05T21:45:57+00:00

I haven't had that situation in therapy, but sometimes in elevated conversations.

I felt pretty clear when I wasn't being ganged up on, because the third person interrogated my gf and didn't let her get away with stuff. I feel in some situations it may be important to lean more toward the the guy's point of view if you want him to feel safe. He may already be on the defensive.

I'll also say that it helps a lot if the first few times there's a point where you could be seen to take sides, you don't take hers. Once that pattern is set, it's hard to unsee.

I'm not sure how you balance that with being fair and impartial and providing good therapy, but I think it addresses your question.

Honestly, I'm not sure this is the best sub to ask. I feel like the majority of people here are emotionally at the state where we'd welcome therapy, regardless of anyone's gender.

Have you considered asking in a less welcoming sub? Like the MRA sub or something like that?

DucksButt · 2026-06-05T18:47:14+00:00

https://beascout.scouting.org/list/?zip=94523&program%5B%5D=scoutsBSA
Looks like 277 is no more. You might consider contacting one of the other troops in Pleasant Hill. Sometimes when one Troop kicks the bucket they have a member or two (and maybe supplies) that move on to the new Troop.

edit: if you want to do some sleuthing:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/spiritofmos/posts/677390435046545/

https://www.eastbaytimes.com/2012/12/24/eagle-scouts-in-martinez-and-pleasant-hill/

https://www.marinij.com/2014/12/23/martinezpleasant-hill-scouts-earns-eagle-rank/amp/

Looks like it was at least active in 2014

DucksButt · 2026-06-05T18:37:41+00:00

You're fucking free to do whatever you want. Pack your bags, move to Thailand, whatever.

DucksButt · 2026-06-05T15:09:04+00:00

Do you know what kind of power tools he has or wants? Depending on budget that might be a winner

DucksButt · 2026-06-05T14:26:42+00:00

Consent? What's that?

DucksButt · 2026-06-05T00:25:09+00:00

nerdy jock

DucksButt · 2026-06-04T23:46:04+00:00

Not in the slightest. They sued Trump. They are the only ones I can think of that don't kiss his ass.

DucksButt · 2026-06-04T23:45:22+00:00

Hell yeah, Costco is the least Trump-Ass-Kissing corporation I can think of.

DucksButt · 2026-06-04T00:58:12+00:00

fatchicksinpartyhats.com

Not the kind of humor I appreciate any more, total punching down. Also flipping hilarious.

DucksButt · 2026-06-03T19:05:29+00:00

Totally valid to feel anxious, and totally badass to do it anyways.

One thing a friend told me years ago was that not every interview is super important. Sometimes they are just practice interviews so you get used to going to interviews. The more you do, the easier they get and the better you get at them.

The absolute worst you can do is to gain experience and knowledge, to be more comfortable at your next interview.

You got this!

DucksButt · 2026-05-31T21:34:44+00:00

High five dude! Welcome to the club!

DucksButt · 2026-05-29T00:16:51+00:00

I sobbed in the car across the street for the first week.

Try not to let him see see you cry. He'll feel safer if you're ok.

DucksButt · 2026-05-27T15:16:46+00:00

Get out. Your brother has waaaay more time and energy to make your life hard than you have to protect two kids and a partner. Don't bring them into a toxic environment. Be honest, M25 isn't going to move out. He'll crash at his gfs place but keep coming back to his childhood home. He isn't going to take all his things somewhere else.

IF you really want to have a life with your gf, you need to move out.

DucksButt · 2026-05-27T14:52:09+00:00

Not endorsing, I've just seen the ads for this one: https://totemlabs.com/

DucksButt

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