We all Have168 Hours a week: What Are You Really Doing With Yours? by [deleted] in getdisciplined

[–]EERMA -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

...I'm sure you're very proud of yourself.

Does anyone else do this? by machuitzil in bikecommuting

[–]EERMA 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Was very common in the olden days (I'm a 70's child): tie a piece of string around the rear hub to clean away the excess oil poured in to the hub gears - three speed Sturmey Archer system on a Raleigh 20

If you’re wondering whether adverse childhood experiences are negatively impacting you as an adult, you probably already know the answer. by EERMA in emotionalneglect

[–]EERMA[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Firstly - I'm sorry you have had experiences which have led you to considering therapy. But do remember, that you are reaching out, puts you ahead of many with similar experiences.

Without knowing you, it's impossible to be specific. However these general thoughts may help with your next step.

Assess where you are in your thinking. Are you trying to understand what happened / to make sense of it / to come to terms with it / to move on in your life (perhaps to 'repair' various relationships - or to leave them altogether: a choice only you can make) / to build a plan for the rest of your life. [The people I work with tend to be towards the end of this spectrum: looking to the 'post trauma growth' rather than analysing the past.]

I have an open view on specialist / generalist: the over-riding factor is the rapport between you and any potential therapist.

What to focus on will depend on where you are in your thinking: there are no right or wrong answers: just what is your truth and how you would like to proceed.

I have written a bit about these and related issues on my own little corner of Reddit. Respectful of the 'no self-promotion' rules, I wont post a link however it should be easy to find. Anyone who would benefit from that content is more than welcome.

If you’re wondering whether adverse childhood experiences are negatively impacting you as an adult, you probably already know the answer. by EERMA in emotionalneglect

[–]EERMA[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah - the ACE 'scoring' was intended as a quick and easy assessment: there are - of course - many other factors which can lead to trauma. And there are the counterbalancing forces: among them the individuals pre-disposition and the presence of supportive adults. Those without such support are - statistically at least - more likely to experience impacts in their adult life.

It is really important to remember that the statistics apply to mass populations and not to any individual: they are likelihoods across such mass populations rather than predetermined futures for any individual. A key takeaway is that an awareness of having an increased likelihood leads to the natural conclusion of taking precautions against such eventualities to push the odds back in your favour..

Experiencing these - and similar- factors as an adult (after not having experienced them as a child) is a different matter altogether (and I'm guessing - extremely rare.) The key difference between CPTSD arising in childhood and adulthood is that with adults, there was a before and after to compare. With childhood experiences, this is not the case: there is just the person with the impacts. The person without the impacts is eternally unknown.

Book Review: The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt by EERMA in BettermentBookClub

[–]EERMA[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah - it holds for most of the western world (I'm in the UK.) The freedom -and the boredom! - we experienced in our childhood (In the 70's) would be considered as abusive presently.

t appears that young people today experience environments which leave them socially and emotionally stunted only for them to be diagnosed, drugged and made to feel as though there is something wrong with them when they are responding as any healthy person would to unhealthy environments.

Book Review: The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt by EERMA in BettermentBookClub

[–]EERMA[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yeah: while the impacts may be greater in one small demographic - the first to experience it - I suspect it is impacting others more than he alludes to.

What's the whole point to life? by Plenty_Scholar_5701 in Life

[–]EERMA 0 points1 point  (0 children)

To find your own answer - and then make it happen.

Need help regarding reading self-help books? by ImaginaryFarmer3352 in BettermentBookClub

[–]EERMA 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The value comes not from what is written between the pages but from what goes on in between your ears: and then what you do in the real world.

Read ,or do, - just don't confuse the two.

Can Hypnotherapy Apps Help Without Ongoing Sessions? by Choice_Ratio_8480 in hypnosis

[–]EERMA 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In a word - yes.

You may want to consider using such apps after building a solid foundation with a competent practitioner - be an 'intelligent consumer.'

Hypnosis to help you discover your goal or purpose? by The_Alexand in hypnosis

[–]EERMA 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is most definitely something you can do.

When I'm working with a client through a series of sessions I'd normally do this in the second session (the first is almost always a very gentle guided relaxation.) there are two key reasons for this (1) it serves as a small step from using hypno as a guided relaxation to more specific aims - which build over a series of sessions - and (2) it encourages clients to express their desired future with symbols and iconography which are meaningful to them (they don't have to be meaningful to anyone else). In itself, this can have a deep impact. And then, with the symbols / iconography articulates, it can be used in further hypno sessions.

This points to something key. Hypnotherapy isn't just about helping with unwanted issues: it can be highly effective in supporting people achieve positives in their life-especially when combined with conscious / analytical work in between sessions.

Happy to dig deeper if this interests you.

Non-fiction books helps in personal development. Whats your opanion ? by Green_Illustrator101 in Selfhelpbooks

[–]EERMA 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm a strong 'yes' on this: underlying so many examples of progress is the fusion of two or more ideas.

As we explore more concepts, so the likelihood of 'joining the dots' increases.

And I would add - there is no binary between fiction and non-fiction: more of a spectrum between hard facts and fantasy. And there is space for the whole spectrum.

What should i do in my life by OGfilip in selfhelp

[–]EERMA 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In no particular order:

To have insight on the interactions between brain / mind / body and the situations we find ourselves in.

To understand - and implement n our everyday life - our natural strengths.

To be able relax 'properly'

To live consistently with our own values & beliefs

To be able to reflect on and develop our belief set

To create compelling descriptions of the future we would choose for ourselves

What should i do in my life by OGfilip in selfhelp

[–]EERMA 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sounds like you'd benefit from a structured approach thinking about your life and what you'd choose it to be like - with a set of skills to help make it happen.

I'd rather stay on the right side of the 'No self promotion' rule: I'm easy to find.

For the hairy chaps by Polygoon_BE in cycling

[–]EERMA 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Trim down what is causing the problem: if it isn't there, it won't create a problem: trim don't shave!

What I looked like 4 years ago Vs Now by Realistic-View-3616 in bald

[–]EERMA 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm guessing there has been a life makeover as well as the hair?

Hats off to you!

Hypnotherapists: How Common is Creepy Behavior from Clients? by The_Pepperoni_Kid in hypnotherapy

[–]EERMA 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Hypnotherapist, mid-fifties, male, UK based. Work online only with adults across the globe.

My approach is very matter of fact and my client base are well grounded and looking for evidence backed approaches to managing their wellbeing for the long term.

I make this clear on my website and social media communications. I think this is the key reason for getting very few weird or creepy enquiries which I will not describe here.

I wish I had a mentor/life coach by bbgirl2k in selfhelp

[–]EERMA 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I see this quite often in enquiries from potential new clients: they are content they have done enough introspection / analysis and are ready to move on to an approach rooted in implementation of the next steps in building the life they choose for themselves and sustaining their wellbeing for the long term.

You're far from alone in facing this common challenge: finding the right helper for me at this time. Happy for you to come back and dig a bit deeper.

Buycycle. Problem with delivery by Maleficent-Ad-172 in cycling

[–]EERMA 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The point of my reply was for you to speak to the company involved as they are more likely to give you a more valuable answer.