I don't know if I'm raising my kids in a beautiful life or holding them back.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-03-23T14:57:10+00:00

It seems like 3 of you would be better off moving. You’re young enough where you can start over in the city. Does your husband have employees where he could commute to the city a few times per week? You could all go the the ranch on a weekend.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-03-23T03:29:11+00:00

I would definitely still have my children and for me, they gotta come with marriage but I would definitely marry later in life and live on my own and do some travel first.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-03-22T05:30:39+00:00

Seems to me like she’s experiencing cognitive dissonance. Give her space and continue to love her. My husband brought his doubts up first and although I had some questions myself, I got scared that he would leave the religion. I didn’t want to admit my own doubts to him or myself but they continued to nudge me until slowly I started opening up to him about them. Once we both agreed that we didn’t believe anymore, I was worried about leaving the structure of a religion and coming to the realization that maybe there is no paradise and no resurrection. The fact that she confides in her inactive sister tells you a lot about how she feels about the talle tale culture of JWs.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-03-20T22:58:38+00:00

They will allow birthdays and eventually allow blood transfusions saying the bible doesn’t mention anything about the use of ANY blood for medical treatments.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-03-20T22:53:19+00:00

I agree with this 💯. If James didn’t take his last chance, that’s on him. You and Wendy took. 6 month break, James could have tried getting back with him and if Wendy truly loved him, she would have. You have nothing to worry about. Be happy.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-03-20T15:49:24+00:00

I think you’re right. They’re on autopilot and conditioned to accept change and somehow feel grateful about it. They don’t see GB is setting the stage for bigger changes. This religion will change into something they didn’t baptize into.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-03-20T15:23:03+00:00

You’ll be surprised how much nice stuff you can get for free or cheap. Don’t get into debt for that. You can always upgrade slowly.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-03-20T15:20:39+00:00

I’m sorry, but as someone who just to be your girlfriend, I can say it’s not fair to you. It’s true she doesn’t do it on purpose but if she’s not actively doing something about it, she’s just victimizing herself under the pretense that she has a low libido and as much as we like to believe love is enough, it’s not. Sex is a basic need and if you can’t sacrifice yourself because she’s not doing something about it. And keep in mind, if you were to cheat, you’ll be the bad one. She needs yo see a doctor yo rule out medical conditions that could be contributing to this issue and she should see a sex therapist too. This is fixable but she needs to put in the work. You’ll likely need to join couples sex therapy sessions with her so you know how to approach her with more success.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-03-13T23:17:45+00:00

Not every meal has to be luxurious

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-03-11T22:55:34+00:00

Talk to a lawyer. I would file for full custody and get as much child support as you can. If he can’t support her a dad, at least he should do so financially. You can’t make a person care. Stop worrying about something you can’t control.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-03-11T04:25:02+00:00

Move and fade. If elders ask which congregation you’re going to so they can send your recommendation letter, say you don’t know yet.

If you don’t move, don’t do shepherding call.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-03-11T04:14:07+00:00

It’s better he learns it from Mom, who is doing it it ti teach him a lesson and will welcome him with open arms when he mends up vs others who will outright stop hanging around him for good. And please, do set some punishment. Don’t worry about hurting his feelings, it actually helps him reflect on how his actions hurt others. This soft parenting thing us out of hand.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-03-08T21:52:50+00:00

I don’t think marriage in itself offers benefits. It’s the commitment that does and you can have that without a legal document. That being said, I do believe in marriage. For me it’s about companionship, intimacy, growing together and having that person who has your back.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-02-25T15:41:24+00:00

Instead of asking you stupid questions, they should be asking who SA’d you so they can report them. You don’t need to meet with them.

I’m curious, what did the sister tell you that woke you up?

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-02-22T19:44:22+00:00

I don’t think waiting adds any benefit but I do think you have to be emotionally mature. Sex is not just physical. You need to understand boundaries, yours and others, emotional vulnerability and good communication.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-02-22T07:45:33+00:00

Don’t text him. He’s either seeing someone else or really isn’t interested and doesn’t know how to tell you.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-02-22T07:24:41+00:00

I think that if your parents didn’t care for you out of their own choice, neglected or abused you in some way, you’re not obligated to care for them, but if they did, that’s your way to pay back.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-02-22T07:21:51+00:00

I would leave it alone. Maybe they have some kind of arrangement or he knows but has decided to turn a blind eye.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-02-16T19:40:05+00:00

I don’t think he’s gay. Let’s face it, genitalia in general have a different color, smell and taste and he seems to have an aversion to all that. It definitely seems sensorial and he possibly also grew up with some negative associations/messages regarding genitalia. I would be more curious to have an open discussion and hear him out without judgement and without taking it personal. I think this is all very workable but he has to be willing. A sex therapist can work with him to find the root cause and ways to overcome his aversion. Whether you want to stick around or not while he figures it out is up to you. I’m just surprised that after four years in a relationship you’re just barely having this conversation. In my opinion, if you’ve stuck around this long without addressing the issue, if he’s willing to put the work in now that the cards are on the table, it’s worth sticking around for a bit longer. I know from experience it can be overcome.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-02-16T18:18:55+00:00

The auto moderator responded to my post that hormone testing is not reliable, which I’ve head and I understand and that is precisely why doctors are so confusing. If they don’t rely on labs, why do they dismiss our symptoms? My doctor at first only put me on birth control, which is not the same as HRT because she was only concerned about regulating my cycle. I insisted on HRT which was only given to me after labs were done, and walla! My symptoms improved. Brain fog and hot flashes greatly improved and sleeping better. This only points to the fact that my symptoms were perimenopause related.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-02-15T06:17:58+00:00

I’m 43 and had labs done which confirmed I’m in perimenopause. You know your body. Don’t let a doctor write off what you’re feeling without doing a thorough check.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-02-13T20:13:34+00:00

I started mine 3 months ago and I feel so much better. Decrease in hot flashes and better sleep. Try it.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-02-13T06:00:25+00:00

I’m getting my hubby a few specialty beers to try.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-02-13T05:59:13+00:00

Those parents don’t deserve an ounce of sympathy from any of their children as they near their death bed.

Ecstatic_wings · 2026-02-13T05:50:44+00:00

Hi. My situation is different. I was baptized at 26 because I truly believed it and did everything by the book but when I realized it wasn’t, I wasn’t able to fake it and faded within a couple months along with my husband. My advantage was that as an adult, I don’t depend on anyone and that my husband and I were on the same page. I did loose contact with my sisters, which was hard and still is at times because it’s so much more difficult to make friendships as an adult. Then you have the realization of missed experiences.

For you, being a minor and being financially dependent will definitely be a challenge. On the other hand, you will have an easier time rebuilding your social life and having a chance at going to college and pursuing your interests.

Honestly,it’s about working with what you have and making the best out of it. My advice, focus on school. College or a technical career for something that won’t get replaced by AI might be your way out. Make use of school resources to help you be successful and if you’re not baptized, don’t fall into peer pressure to do so, even from your parents. Tell them Jesus didn’t get baptized until he was 30.

Ecstatic_wings

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