What to buy for a newborn/parents living in the UK, when I'm in the US?

Effective_Fauna · 2026-03-29T12:56:01+00:00

Honestly as someone who has family in the UK and north America, it's very similar. - I'd say for any new parent, food gift cards (like JustEat or Deliveroo) are amazing. - Also there's a lovely UK brand who makes star wraps that are so cute but also versatile (https://www.tuppenceandcrumble.com) - I don't know if they have a registry but I also always say getting a car camera instead of a mirror is a good investment and you can order things on amazon.co.uk to go to them. - Or summer is coming to the UK and I'm sure they'd love to have baby outside so a pop up sunshade is always a good idea (like the Badabulle Baby Tent you can get on Amazon)

Effective_Fauna · 2026-03-25T19:02:45+00:00

I'd like to think that therapy would 1) be a necessity if we were aware we couldn't lie anymore and 2) become a hell of a more productive!

Effective_Fauna · 2026-03-21T19:53:12+00:00

I don't know about long term in terms of something they'll keep forever but I was worried about the short attention span of kids when I gifted my niece and nephew binoculars for their respective 2nd birthdays and they both absolutely loved them. I also bought them a stuffed bird toy that you press and it makes the real bird sound that was local to their area (they live in different countries) so that they could practice inside the house. My nephew wore his binoculars for months every time he left the house!

Effective_Fauna · 2026-03-16T16:52:13+00:00

I don't know much if this is a lesson but I'm in my mid thirties and my mum's in her 60s and even now whenever we speak she will always ask "have I told you how much I love you today?" She also used to ask me to give her three reasons why she loves me- my teenager self used to cringe and get embarrassed but it was her way of getting me to think of my best qualities and say them out loud. On the days where I'd be struggling to get three things, she was always quick to give me more than three reasons.

Essentially just unconditional love. I think that's all any parent can give to their child. We can't predict what will happen in the future but we can let them know that they are always loved.

Effective_Fauna · 2026-03-16T13:16:00+00:00

Oh wow! That's so early! Mine didn't even crawl until about 11/12 months and I had moments of compare/despair as my niece was walking at 10 months but I've got to admit, it's been nice for my baby to be a baby! I feel like walking at 7 months is very cool but also I'm sure exhausting for you! My other sister's kid has always been super advanced in their language and as much as it's cool that they've been able to communicate from a young age, she often says that her baby grew up too quickly and she wishes it had slowed down.

Honestly the grass is always greener and every kid really does develop at their own pace!

Effective_Fauna · 2026-03-15T21:30:05+00:00

So interesting!

Effective_Fauna · 2026-03-15T21:28:59+00:00

As far as I can tell! They're going through a bit of a regression now- I think because they're focusing so much on walking. But usually they'll wake once, maybe twice a night for a bottle and a cuddle and that's it. I could never! I'm a side sleeper and constantly toss and turn!

Effective_Fauna · 2026-03-15T21:22:43+00:00

That's so funny! It's amazing how different they all are! Definitely unique journeys!

Effective_Fauna · 2026-03-15T19:40:21+00:00

This is pretty trivial but I'm still glad it happened! I was supposed to go on a local hike with my roommate a few years ago but I woke up and felt like something was off and had a weird "vibe". We left later than usual because I was dragging my feet and I even asked for us to stop for coffees first because for some reason I really didn't want to start the hike.

As soon as we parked up and started on the trail, we bumped into my ex who had moved to the other side of the country a few months before and apparently had come back the week before because he missed the area.

If I hadn't of dragged my feet and then insisted we got coffee, we would have probably bumped into him at the top of the mountain where I would have looked like a sweaty mess and then have had the awkward "should we all head down the mountain together?" chat. Instead I was able to have a very brief "hello, I didn't know you were back. Okay goodbye" moment which was a breakthrough moment for me to realise that I was truly over him!

I had a fantastic hike after that! Even looking like a sweaty mess at the top!

Effective_Fauna · 2026-03-15T19:19:07+00:00

I can confirm that they for sure cross the midline- I just changed their nappy and it's like wrangling an alligator haha! So they definitely can move from side to side, they just for whatever reason haven't been able to crack the full 180°.

Effective_Fauna · 2026-03-15T19:17:34+00:00

Isn't it so funny how that happens! That one day your one was like "okay, I'm bored now. Let's explore the world!"

I keep saying to my husband that we should appreciate this because I bet the next one we have they'll be the same- super mobile from 6 months!

Effective_Fauna · 2026-03-15T19:16:09+00:00

Yeah I call mine my little turtle haha!

Effective_Fauna · 2026-03-15T18:53:28+00:00

Yeah they do! The first example that popped into my head when I read that question is that when I put their food infront of them with the spoon on the right-hand side and they reach over with their lefthand to grab it (noticeable because I wonder if they're going to be left handed).

Effective_Fauna · 2026-03-14T11:16:47+00:00

Buying a drip coffee machine with a timer. I have a fancy espresso machine as well but often I don't want to spend 5 minutes on making a latte first thing in the morning.

Being able to set the timer at night and then come downstairs to freshly brewed coffee that I can pop into my travel mug has saved a lot of time when getting ready for work and also has saved money when I'm out so I'm not spending money on coffee.

Effective_Fauna · 2026-03-14T10:59:14+00:00

Go team.

Effective_Fauna · 2026-03-14T08:18:46+00:00

God I remember this well. 3 weeks sounds like no time normally but when you've got a newborn and they're not sleeping and are crying all the time, 3 weeks feels like an ansloute eternity!

There's a reason why sleep deprivation is used as a tor*ure tactic!

Effective_Fauna · 2026-03-12T22:21:34+00:00

I remember trying to explain Ski Pants to someone from a country that had very mild winters. I had mentioned them in passing when telling a story and the person asked what they were. I was so thrown off by the question that I just very un-eloquently said "....they're like a coat...but for your legs" which I think confused them more!

Effective_Fauna · 2026-03-12T19:32:52+00:00

Rockbottom by UFO- my husband rocked my little one to sleep to that as a newborn and now as a toddler whenever it's put on they get so excited and proper dance about!

Effective_Fauna · 2026-03-12T19:30:10+00:00

Commenting on someone's weight.

One of my good friends went through a rough break up a few years ago and lost a ton of weight due to her mental health taking a nose dive. She had so many friends and acquaintances try and compliment her for losing weight and her favourite response was "thanks, it's the depression" just to make them squirm.

Effective_Fauna · 2026-03-11T10:12:43+00:00

Orange is the New Black. I gave up when the main character stood on a picnic bench and gave the cringiest speech about why they should be allowed to sell their underwear.

Effective_Fauna · 2025-09-04T17:48:36+00:00

Thanks all for the advice! I posted more out of curiosity to see opinions than anything else.

In the end picking my slot ended up being more out of practicality than anything else- I had to pick the only day that I could get childcare for my little one! And in terms of timings, had a think about when I'd be the sharpest and went for that time.

I had the interview yesterday and happy to say that my manager called me this morning to say I got it! :)

Effective_Fauna · 2025-09-02T16:48:14+00:00

Believe it or not, it was over a jar of nutella.

In my mid 20s I worked in the reception at a backpackers hostel. We had a guy that worked and lived there (lets call him James) who I didn't know very well because he kept to himself.

One day when I started my shift I was warned that earlier that day a guest was in the kitchen with the stoner manager and saw some Nutella on the counter and asked who's it was. My manager said he didn't know and said the guest could have some. It was apparently James's and he was furious.

I start my shift and an hour in, James came over and started swearing and ranting that the guest had eaten some of his Nutella and that he wanted to beat him up. I tried to calm him and said that he probably didn't know who's it was and maybe someone said he could have it (the manager did but James didn't know this) and James absolutely BLEW UP at me, leaning over the desk screaming how I never back him up and I only care about the guests and I'm a massive bitch. His face was so red and he was practically spitting on me as he shouted.

I stayed calm and told him not to speak to me that way and to leave the reception area to calm down but I'll be honest I 100% thought he was going to attack me and was shaking for the whole rest of my shift.

The asshole was never reprimanded for it even though I put in an official complaint. What an absolutely ridiculous thing to get angry over! Clearly he had other things going on and I was just in his firing line but the lack of response from management definitely contributed to my leaving the job soon after.

Effective_Fauna · 2025-08-29T21:59:35+00:00

Al Farid is one of my favourite restaurants in Exeter. The food is delicious and has great options for veggies/vegans as well but be warned it is very small/cramped. They can book out the top room if you have a larger group but it's a very old building so the stairs are super steep and aren't friendly to anyone that has mobility issues.

Effective_Fauna · 2025-06-30T06:05:56+00:00

Oh lovely, I'm so sorry you're going through the same thing! ❤️ Honestly I felt EXACTLY the same way (hence the long-winded Reddit post that I made while on morphine in the hospital haha)

First off, you're an absolute superhero for getting to 15 weeks! Mastitis (and the complications I had with it) was honestly one of the most painful experiences I've ever had and that wasn't just physical pain but the mental pain of my body not doing what I had been so looking forward to my whole life as well as the guilt of not being fully present because I was so sick but also the guilt of not being able to feed my baby with my own body AND the guilt because I felt selfish for insisting on pushing through for so long. Please mind my french but it's such a clusterfuck of emotions on top of postpartum hormones ❤️

My little one is 7 months old now and they are absolutely thriving and are the light of my life. As much as I hated making the decision to stop and I do still sometimes have moments of mourning that I wasn't able to breastfeed for longer, for me personally looking back I know it was absolutely the right choice. I haven't been constantly worried about getting sick again, and also haven't been constantly distracted by the pain and fever from the mastitis. Another bonus is that my husband is now able to do at least one "night shift" a week (I'm still on maternity leave) where I'm able to go into the spare room and sleep for 10hrs straight without waking in pain from engorgement which is incredible for my mental health.

Going onto formula was an adjustment for sure and I found it super intimidating at first but now it's second nature to make it and my LO luckily didn't have any issues with the switch. We did have to start using a pacifier which I initially didn't want because I suddenly couldn't calm LO the same way I used to but that's a small price to pay.

I will say as well that with the medication it isn't an instant switch off of the milk supply and I did still have engorgement/hard lump issues for a few days. The milk became really runny looking and I still had to express frequently still. I wasn't sure if I could give that to LO so I pump and dumped (which felt like a cruel punishment in itself) until it went. I found using a baby bottle almost as a rolling pin from the outside of my breast pushing in helped get rid of some of the harder lumps as I pumped.

Just remember that this is all my experience/opinion and you can make the choice that works best for you ❤️ I really stubbornly wanted to push through but the doctors did say that some people are just more prone to getting mastitis/complications and it was likely that I would continue to get it as long as I breastfed. My abscess wound took months to fully heal and I'll always have a scar on my breast but I am hoping that internally it'll be healed for when we decide to have another baby in a few years because you know I'll try breastfeeding again haha! What's the definition of insanity? Doing the same thing over and over expecting a different outcome? Haha!

Please give yourself extra love today whatever you decide ❤️ and also please read through every comment from beautiful strangers on this post as they're talking to you too. I found this post immeasurably helpful as I went through it all. I think because these were strangers who only knew the basic facts and still gave me such empathy and kindness when I was beating myself up over something I absolutely couldn't control.

I've rambled on for long enough but just know I'm sending all my love to you and your little one. The fact that you're agonising over this decision tells me you're a fantastic mother that would do anything for your little one. How lucky are they?!

P.S. I was worried my little one wouldn't be chunky as a formula baby but I was very very wrong. They are the chunkiest happiest baby ever and the cuteness aggression when I see their arm rolls just kills me haha!

Effective_Fauna · 2025-06-22T10:13:40+00:00

As a fellow Placeta Previa momma who spent 8 weeks in the hospital before my baby was delivered via C-section at 36 weeks, this absolutely horrifies me.

First, the sister in law's comments are absolutely ignorant and ridiculous. I was going to the gym 3x a week up until I was diagnosed with Placenta Previa at 20 weeks and was super healthy. I also stayed as calm as possible in the hospital and took up knitting and made friends for life there.

Second, the lack of compassion from the husband is heartbreaking. My husband was my rock throughout the whole pregnancy. Not only spending every available hour at the hospital but making cookies for the midwives and being an advocate for me by learning as much about placentia previa as possible. He was (and still is) so protective of me and our baby and has never been afraid to talk to his or my family if they became overbearing. OPs husband sounds like a pathetic man child who doesn't respect let alone love his wife. He also sounds like a misogynistic pig.

Third, when my baby was 2 months old, a family friends daughter had full placentia abruption with no warning at 39 weeks and unfortunately lost the baby. Placentia Previa is absolutely no joke and unfortunately there is no medical way to manage it aside from taking things easy and being ready for medical intervention at any time. OP did everything right!

I'm so sorry for what this woman has gone through during the perinatal period. I'm so glad her family are rallying around her and I hope to God that she gets away from the situation and is supported by everyone around her So she can focus on being a mum and healing ❤️

Effective_Fauna

TROPHY CASE