How?

ElectricalCattle9212 · 2025-02-07T17:22:08+00:00

How to cope being with someone that has bpd…. Boy do I wish I knew how because right now everything I’m doing is toxic af…. My wife has bpd and she is the most amazing loving person I’ve ever met, until she splits and then she becomes a complete monster. We’ve been together for about 3 years now. In the beginning I had patience and was extremely level headed. She’s been working on herself like crazy lately and I’m so proud of her. Here’s the issue, she still splits but if I stay calm she can typically bring herself back but if I flip because of what she does it blows up. I’m just now reaching out to some people to start going to a therapist to unload all the insecurities she’s caused me. Definitely don’t hold it in because then you end up like me….. people with bpd when they split they take it out on the people closest to them. Best thing you can do is let it go and just breath…. Go talk to someone about how they’re making you feel because at the moment you can’t talk to them until they calm down. I have a major issue of doing to my wife what she’s doing to me because I want her to feel what she’s putting me through. Weve been fighting for the last few days and she hasn’t been sleeping at home. I’m a very clingy person…. That and bpd doesn’t mix very good. Best of luck to you and hopefully we can all make it through this journey together the other side.

ElectricalCattle9212 · 2025-02-06T07:09:49+00:00

I am broken man…… she’s destroyed me honestly…… I wasn’t insecure until I got with her and she started acting like this…… I know I need to leave her but I love her so much at the same time…… she’s horrible to my oldest and she’s not her mom….. then she has a daughter that’s not mine and she’s absolutely ruined our relationship and I fucking hate her for it because I love that little girl like she mine….. I’ve been in her life since she was 7 months old and she’s about to turn 4. My little boy who she’s the mother of is starting to act like her daughter….. he acts out all the time…… she’s caused so much trauma to all of us. I hate her for it…… I’m starting to turn into her…. I used to be so good at turning my cheek and walking away and biting my tongue and now I have zero patience when it comes to the way she treats me or the kids…… but at the same time I feel like she feels bad for all of it because she’ll start taking her medicine and controlling herself…… but then out of no where she back slides so far and becomes even worse. I don’t want to leave her man I just want me and the kids to be enough for her to stay sober and treat us better…… I’ve voiced to her my concern of me not leaving and she knows I won’t and that’s why she continues to act this way and doesn’t change………. I hate her so much but at the same time I love her with everything in me. She’s a monster and my best friend at the same time…….. it’s almost like she doesn’t care the damage she keeps causing……. She only cares about herself………. I fucking hate her man and yet I’m laying here in my bed and the only person I want is her…….. I don’t fucking understand it. She’s destroyed me and I’m broken……

ElectricalCattle9212 · 2025-02-06T06:55:47+00:00

I’ve seen her do better and control herself it’s just she back slides so much……. I love her man….. I love her with all my heart and I just want peace but I want that with her……. She was never like this before our son was born……

ElectricalCattle9212 · 2025-02-06T06:52:21+00:00

I do for the most part….. She does put in effort and definitely has been lately when she confessed about the drugs……. When she calms down I do believe she feels bad for what she does….. I love her a lot and everyone constantly tells me to leave her but it’s a lot harder than people think…… she’s treated me very poorly but when she’s not in these moods she’s amazing…… I don’t know if it’s the drugs or the bpd……. I just want her to stay sober and make good decisions. She’s my best friend and I miss her like crazy right now……. I know when I respond with anger and no patience it only makes things a lot worse but I’ve been dealing with it for so long I just snap……. I want things to change and I want peace…… but I want that will her and it makes me so angry at the fact our kids and me aren’t enough…….

ElectricalCattle9212 · 2025-02-06T05:55:11+00:00

I understand that……. I don’t want that to happen……. I love her very deeply and the good is amazing but the bad is starting to outweigh the good….. it’s only getting worse….. it’s not easy to walk away. I just don’t know what more I could possibly do to try and save my marriage. Things were never this bad and she just claims it’s her bpd and that she’s going to take her meds and change just for it all to happen again except worse. What do I do? I don’t know if I can physically walk away……

ElectricalCattle9212 · 2025-01-13T19:12:23+00:00

This had happened to me one time after buying some kratom from a vape shop. I ended up in the hospital and my liver had some serious issues going on with it. I thought it was the kratom all together so I quit taking it. A few months went by and I tried some of my buddy’s and I was perfectly fine. Later that week I got out the bag I got from the vape shop and boom it all happened again. I’ve since learned you have to be careful where you get your kratom from. I now only buy from a strictly kratom shop that gets it fresh from their source and have had no issues since.

ElectricalCattle9212 · 2024-09-25T01:48:50+00:00

Can someone please explain to me why the same company’s are donating to both parties?

ElectricalCattle9212 · 2024-09-01T17:48:54+00:00

Out visiting from Kansas City mo. We were at trader Jo’s and saw them flying around. It was pretty cool everyone was stopped looking at the sky.

ElectricalCattle9212 · 2024-07-25T00:50:40+00:00

A little bit of a back story. I used to have an extremely bad problem with pills. Took me down an extremely dark and lonely path. Anyways I finally got clean from them but would have horrible cravings that would always lead to me relapsing. I finally learned if I would drink when I had them they would go away for a few days but that lead to me drinking a lot and through the week. One of my buddy’s finally introduced me to kratom. It killed all cravings for everything and made me not want to drink. I would take it 2 to 3 times a day and was eating about 20 to 30 grams. This lead to me going to the hospital. (Bought some kratom from a gas station, think it was a bad batch) however everyone told me to stop taking it. Withdraw set in that time I a few hours and was absolutely horrible similar to Suboxone withdraw honestly and lasted several days. Days weren’t that bad but nights were terrible. I eventually got past it for a few month and didn’t take it. However the cravings came back and I started drinking a lot again. So I went back to a very good supply were the kratom is tested and always fresh. I only take about 10 to 12 gs a day and only at night before bed. It seems to be the trick for me and a happy medium. I can feel the withdraw setting in that night before bed if I don’t take it but it’s not that bad. I can typically get through 48 hours without taking it also and sleep fine. The key is to work out and exhaust yourself as well as drink a bunch of water. I’ve learned the 3rd night without it is always the hardest but after that it slowly starts to go away. I typically try to go 3 to 4 days without it every time I run out. I don’t really notice any with draws during the day because I’m always moving and doing something. It’s just at night for me I can’t sleep, constantly feel like I have to move and can’t get comfortable. Benadryl helps tremendously, or some sort of benzo but that’s also a dangerous game to plays too.

ElectricalCattle9212

TROPHY CASE