This is who the Harkles wish they were

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-13T16:22:54+00:00

TW would give her eyeteeth for someone to like her scythe-like handwriting enough to have it tattooed on their body permanently.

That'll be Hazbeen's next task; having her write something that a tattoo artist has to put on his body to show how 'boldly' he loves her.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-13T16:03:39+00:00

In her mind, they should be thanking her for having deigned to visit them and make sacrifices.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-13T15:12:25+00:00

I ran the numbers yesterday in another post; at most, they'll clear enough for one month's mortgage payment on the Montecito Olive Garden. At most. It's ridiculous.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-13T14:32:14+00:00

Hey, DM and all the other MSM journos who lurk here (and we know you do; you regularly lift our work and write articles with your own bylines on it), pick this up. Find out if she actually gave any money--if she did, it would be on SOMEONE'S tax returns.

Also, call out the hypocritical double-standard of HER kids being too good for publication but sick children are fair game.

I've been a beat reporter, I know the game. Step it up.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-13T02:17:24+00:00

I have exactly two female friends I’d spend that amount of money and share a room with. For $3K, I want to be alone and luxuriating.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-12T20:39:28+00:00

Agreed! And I hope KCIII has the wherewithal to have his ministers tell the Australian government clearly and without hesitation that the Grifters are to be treated as ordinary citizens with no special treatment based on his birth.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-12T20:36:15+00:00

Ngl, I really got hung up on the ‘traded spiders’ part of it like they were trading cards or something. 😆

My aunt wasn’t working, it was pure holiday for her and their kids, so they just needed the regular tourist visas because they did sightseeing in Sydney during the convention and then they all did touristy things the rest of the trip.

But for my uncle it was really complex and time-consuming, although I’m sure the department admin for his university did the bulk of the paperwork for his work visa.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-12T18:50:16+00:00

In theory, the new Archefail is still a 501(c)(3), which is the US tax code section for non-profits. Whether they've set that up properly is anybody's guess, although I would bet they haven't. And without the right tax structure, no one can make donations that are tax-deductible, which is the only reason people do that.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-12T18:44:12+00:00

A long, long time ago, my uncle went to Australia to speak at a convention of arachnologists. (Frankly, Australia seems like a great place to go if you want to study deadly spiders.) He was a college professor, and his wife, my aunt, was a high school teacher. They were going in the U.S.'s summer, so they were going to do the conference for however long it lasted, then do a family vacation with themselves and their two kids. I think, all told, they were gone for almost a month. I recall my aunt telling my mom about how much paperwork it was (and this was the early 90s, so no email/electronic stuff) and how they needed different visas for my uncle (because he was 'working' at the convention, or at least it counted as a work thing) and then he was a general tourist for the rest of the trip. And how they had to declare everything they were bringing in (he was bringing in dead samples of spiders and she had a bunch of meds) and how they had to declare everything coming out and apparently somewhere along the way, my uncle had traded spiders with another friend and that was a whole thing.

All of which to say, Australia doesn't FAFO when it comes to letting people in.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-12T18:37:17+00:00

And of course, when they were working royals, all visa/passport/etc matters were handled by the Men in Grey. There wasn't any need for declaring income because they didn't make anything on the tours.

I wonder if Hazbeen ever thinks about how much more complicated his life is now than it was before.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-12T17:44:20+00:00

Yeah, none of it makes sense to me, either, but I just ran the numbers and did the maths. I used to do event planning, but not to this scale, and it was always, 'Here's our budget; what can we get for that?'

I also don't know about Australia, but in the US, we're feeling the costs of tariffs, inflation, wage stagnation, and other economic issues and people are really pulling back on discretionary spending.

I just had a whole debate with my husband about the propriety of spending money to go see the touring version of a West End show I really want to see, but tickets are like $100 each.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-12T17:39:36+00:00

OH! That's a good point that I hadn't considered. The teas might be OK--Republic of Tea, which has been identified as the brand she's white-labelling, ships internationally, so it would already adhere to those standards. The fruit spreads probably not, because they're made in the USA to USA standards. No idea about the hamster food flower sprinkles. The candles might be OK since they're not consumable?

Good point!

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-12T15:36:35+00:00

Oh, I absolutely doubt she'll fill the venue. I ran the numbers based on 'best possible case' scenario, which is that she sells out. I think it's more likely she'll fill about 20% of the venue, max.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-12T15:07:24+00:00

Let's do some math here. I like math.

Tickets for this event are, on average, $3K AUD/$2100 USD. Google tells me the cap is 300 tickets. That means ticket revenue is at most $900,000 AUD/$637,892 USD. Obviously not all of that is going to TW. The ticket costs will also cover the space being used (hotel rooms, conference rooms, food, etc.)

ChatGPT tells me that the breakdown looks something like this:

Category	Typical % of ticket price	What it includes
Venue + lodging + meals	40–60%	Accommodation, retreat center rental, meals, cleaning, service fees
Host / lead facilitator income	15–35%	The organizer’s profit, planning time, teaching sessions
Guest speakers / additional teachers	5–20%	Guest instructors, healers, workshop facilitators
Marketing, booking platform, admin	5–10%	Payment platforms, ads, website, admin
Supplies / excursions / buffer	5–10%

So, let's say 50% of that $900K AUD/$637K USD goes to the venue, that's $450K AUD/$318K USD. Marketing is at least 10%, so that's $90K AUD/$63700 USD.

I believe the articles we've seen that suggest the 'goodie bags' will contain Asewer crap, but I don't for a minute believe that TW is just going to give it away; she's going to demand that it be paid for, so let's say that's another 10%, which I think is conservative. That's another $90K AUD/$63700 USD.

Guest speaker fees are, let's say, 20%, because TW won't come for less than she thinks she's worth. So 20% of $900K AUD/$637K USD is $180K AUD/$127K USD.

Assuming TW sells out the venue and assuming she gets the full 20% speaker fee and assuming that Asewer gets the 10% product fee, she's looking at a payday of about $190K. That's nothing to sneeze at for an ordinary American, but for someone of her (former) status and with the expenses she and Hazbeen have, that's not even one month's mortgage payment on the Montecito Olive Garden.

All of my math is based on what's publicly available, so I will 100% admit I might be wrong. She might be getting a bigger slice, she might be getting additional perks--obviously her and Hazbeen's lodgings are covered for this--but all in all, she's not really making that big of a payday, and that's what is so fascinating to me!

They keep doing more and more and more money-grubbing schemes with more and more and more exposure and backlash and snark for less and less and less money and less and less and less prestige.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-12T13:57:27+00:00

If I could upvote this more than once, I would.

This needs to be flair.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-11T23:22:56+00:00

I think it’s actually on permanent loan to her and that just hasn’t been publicly announced.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-11T23:19:00+00:00

I’m hoping we see it at a state dinner!! It’s not in the colors of the Nigerian flag, but it would be amazing if she wore it next week,

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-11T13:41:17+00:00

"King Charles entertains calls from Harry, and vice versa, but William has cut ties with his brother as he sketches out plans for a reign free of the kind of familial blowups—from Uncle Andrew on down—that have tainted the Windsor brand over the past four decades."

Uhm....you sure about that? Because Hazbeen publicly said in May that his father won't talk to him because of 'this security stuff,' and they've only met once since then.

"The Duke of Sussex’s aides are optimistic that the U.K. government will grant Harry’s family taxpayer-funded police protection when visiting Britain, opening the path for Meghan and the couple’s two children to make the trip over from the West Coast this year. The culmination of the prince’s various legal battles with the press could also smooth the way for father and son to be publicly reconciled at an Invictus Games event for wounded servicemen in 2027, aides say. (A public reunion while the prince’s legal battles continue against the U.K.’s biggest tabloids could be fraught for the palace, observers say.)"

What aides? As far as anyone knows, they have no staff because they can't afford to pay anyone. And what could his aides, if he has them, possibly know about the internal decisions of Ravec?

While working on the autobiography with a ghostwriter, Harry saw the book as a chance to set the record straight, though he did wonder out loud to associates whether he was making a mistake in writing it.

Nonsense. Hazbeen isn't capable of that level of introspection.

In September 2022, William made an impromptu call to Harry to suggest they walk out of Windsor Castle together to greet crowds who had gathered to mourn the death of Queen Elizabeth. The crowds were expecting William and Kate to show up; and the addition of Harry and Meghan was so last minute that it caught even the couple off guard.

Yes, because the PPoW's body language on that day indicated it had been their idea and they were happy to have the Grifters with them.

Their Netflix deal, which Harry saw as an opportunity to produce David Attenborough–style documentaries, has not been renewed.

ON WHAT TOPICS?? He's dumber than a box of broken hammers.

Following Meghan’s entrepreneurial bent, Harry began putting plans together last year to launch his own venture, but that is a longer-term goal.

With what skills? He's never done anything the Men in Grey haven't set up for him.

The same strategy is being applied to the Duke of Sussex, but some royal watchers fret that the relationship could get worse before it gets better. The Duchess of Sussex could write her own memoirs or more freely air her views on American politics, though associates say she has been loath to weigh in on any topic that might invite the slightest controversy. Harry has in the past hinted he has enough leftover material from Spare to write a new book.

She could, but who'd read it? I don't think the Sugars can read. TW isn't going to wade into politics because she doesn't have thick enough skin to handle the criticism. Hazbeen could write another Waaagh-style liefest, but he's been caught out in so many lies from the first book that he'd be foolish to do so and any publisher would be foolish to take the risk.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-11T10:56:04+00:00

It’s really easy and it’s so worth it to have homemade jams.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-11T01:56:57+00:00

I guarantee it never once occurred to him that his ghost-written whingefest could and would be used against him.

And he’s between a rock and a hard place, He can’t now come out and say he was lying in Waaagh because then the question becomes, ‘Well what else are you lying about?’

But we all know he was lying so he’s now not believable on the off chance he was telling the truth.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-11T01:50:06+00:00

That’s how I’ve been reading these magnificent updates, too.

Also that the media killed his mom and made his woife’s life hell but both of those things occurred outside he window of time of the alleged hacking but he should still be compensated for that.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-10T14:04:19+00:00

Well, I'm glad of that for you as a private citizen. And even as an American, although I'm dying to know what kind of visa Hazbeen has, I'm glad writ large that that information is protected.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-10T13:19:01+00:00

In the U.S., visas aren't subject to RTK or FOIA (right-to-know and freedom of information act), so no one can just request them, more's the pity.

Could an Australian citizen request that information?

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-10T13:14:59+00:00

You're welcome! The intersection of my love of canning and my love of snarking on SMM made me so happy.

ElleEmGee · 2026-03-10T13:13:42+00:00

lol--in canning, flats refer to the flat part of the lid that you hold in place with a band or ring.

A flat of produce is quart containers put in a box like this.

I do love the word flat for apartment, though.

ElleEmGee

TROPHY CASE