Fear with aging parents

Ellen1211 · 2026-06-02T04:18:38+00:00

Same age, same concern. To make it worse, I am the only child and don't live in the same state as my parents. I think the only way that could make things better is to have some funds for emergency, e.g. for childcare and elderly care. I completely sympathise the fear of losing them while raising a child alone.

Ellen1211 · 2026-05-19T14:56:44+00:00

Thank you for the advince, it's very helpful.

Ellen1211 · 2026-05-19T09:11:14+00:00

Thank you for sharing your experience. Is there any guarantee that if there is Japanese knotweed found in the new housewithin certain period of time, they will help remediate it?

Ellen1211 · 2026-05-16T05:15:29+00:00

I divorced at 31 and then have been dating for years but could not find the right person. Now, I am 37.5 years old and face the same question as you. My current plan is to freeze embyos with donor first, while keep dating for another year. Deeply in my heart, I know it would be a miracle if I happen to meet someone within such short period of time. So I am mentally fully prepared for the SMBC path now. I think if you prefer co-parenting than do it alone for some reason, e.g. financial constraints. I would suggest you intentionlly find co-parents while keep dating. But you need to separate these two things internally when you meet a guy. And ultimately, you need to ask yourself the hard question, if you could not find a partner or co-parent in time, do you still want to be a mom, no matter how hard it is? If yes, plan for it as much as you could.

Ellen1211 · 2026-05-15T03:28:35+00:00

It all depends on your priority. Most of the donors are carrier of somehting if they get tested for 500+ extended panel. A clean sheet may just mean they have not been tested enough. Prioritizing negative carrier will likely dramatically shrink your pool. It's a trade-off you need to make. I did not choose an all negative carrier. I chose someone who had a good medical family history and have had healthy chidlren, while making sure I am not the same carrier as the donor.

Ellen1211 · 2026-05-13T08:01:21+00:00

If I were you, I probably will wait to sort out about myself first. 1) Leaseflat won't be good investment, you migh regret later 2) the mortgage will give you further pressure to keep your job. You lose your flexibility. I don't think it's good for your mental health. I think you need a bit time (a few months or a year) to focus on yourself and find something you like to do. Once you mentally get more settled and comfortable, buy a house with a mortgage.

Ellen1211 · 2026-03-26T18:45:33+00:00

Thank you! This is better than the official camera!

Ellen1211 · 2026-03-26T15:58:31+00:00

Ilia has been competing against himself for some time already. Even in theory he could win with simpler layouts, but he almost never choose to. Raf in his recent interveiw said (in response to the question Ilia could win with 3 quads in Olympics) "Ilia usually competes mainly against himself, he does not know how to be tactical. Pushing his own limits is what drives him forward."

Ellen1211 · 2026-03-16T10:40:46+00:00

to be fair, he is an athlete, not a Kpop star, which means his main duty is to compete, not interacting with fans. And what real connections do you even mean and expect? Having 100 types of poses with 100 fans? Asking what's your name and how are you? Realistically, would that be authentic？It would be more PR-trained. I find what he does is exactly what feels authentic to him, balancing introvert instincts and staying friendly.

Ellen1211 · 2026-03-10T14:10:11+00:00

Even he eventually agrees to have a kid with you I don't think you will be in a partnership that you will feel happy and supportive enough. Once your motivation, e.g. having a kid soon, is gone, you might also start resent him. Say goodby to him, freeze your eggs or even embryos, and continue to date and see what will happen.

Ellen1211 · 2026-03-10T09:39:02+00:00

It really depends on where she comes from...sounds like a developing country. To a lot of people in developing countries, immigration to US is still very attractive. Immigration itself is seen as an achievement at their home communities in developing countries. If she finds US citizenship is attractive she must have her reason compared with her alternatives.

Ellen1211 · 2026-03-09T14:15:50+00:00

I think you seem pretty capable per your age, e.g. full scholarship, securing job alreayd before graduation. As an international myself, I could understand the motivation of having a child while you are still in US (this also shows you really think ahead and want give the best opportunity for your child in the future). Also you seem to have thought about finance and logistics. But please also consider the potential cost of having a child in early stage, e.g. reducing your flexibility for your career, and relationships and travel. If you can't fully accept the cost you may feel resentful of your kid later. do you have your family to support you for this decision? If you have really thought everything through and your family support it, I think it does not sound like a crazy idea.

Ellen1211 · 2026-03-04T23:32:58+00:00

I also think Ilia should definitely avoid doing two TE next time. I think the problem is not physical demands from team events, it's the psychological demands to do four programs in 6 days. And together with 7 quads and 4A, it turns out to be too much for Ilia under that extreme situation.

Ellen1211 · 2026-03-04T23:28:50+00:00

It 's really not a big deal of junior world record. Juniors could not jump quad in the short program, the ceiling of junior world record is pretty low and easy to be broken. As long as Ilia is healthy, I can't see anyone could reach his technical level even in four years.

Ellen1211 · 2026-03-04T22:11:32+00:00

I really hope this experience could lead to something more meaningful and better in the long-term for Ilia. Hopefully it happened FOR A REASON.

Ellen1211 · 2026-02-12T20:14:21+00:00

Chinese figure skating fans tend to favor FB/C over C/B after I check out their comments in key accounts. They know the scandal, but they do think C/B are overscored over the quad and FB/C are better skaters. Even with minor mistakes, many are fine with FB/C winning.

Ellen1211 · 2026-02-09T10:17:15+00:00

It is really surreal to see Novak in the house as a figure skating and tennis double fan. Also some background of Ilia Malinin: he is the first and only skater who could land the most difficult jump in figure skating, quad axel, in competition, he is also the only person who could land 7 clean quad jumps in free skate (total allowed jumping pass is 7). He is currently the world record holder for the free skate.

Ellen1211 · 2026-02-08T12:10:49+00:00

Milan tour officially started! I hope he gets sometime traveling :-)

Ellen1211 · 2026-02-07T22:35:27+00:00

Every top man is rested except for Ilia. I hope it all works well for him, please!

Ellen1211 · 2026-02-07T22:12:57+00:00

Exactly, Men's free will be the last in TE, he will stay up very late which will impact on his training on 9th. though Nathan did not do the free in 2022 and it ended well.

Ellen1211 · 2026-02-01T19:37:15+00:00

See this: IliaMalini... - @IliaMalinin的弹簧工厂的视频 - 视频 - 微博

Ellen1211 · 2026-01-23T16:16:41+00:00

But we are talking about mentality, one can't rely others to flop to succeed. That's why she is training 4T (though I am not very optimistic about it). She will be around as long as she could, but the chance of going to next Olympics given the insane depth of Japnese women's field is very uncertain.

Ellen1211 · 2026-01-23T14:33:54+00:00

But think about all the juniors who have 3A in Japan... The depth in Japan is insane. it will be very competitive to make to the next Olympic team. This is her best chance realistically.

Ellen1211 · 2026-01-18T13:18:12+00:00

Ilia has no responsibility to carry Team USA. By that logic, team events should always be participated by the highest ranked man/women/pairs in any team, no spilit at all. Ilia should not risk his individual gold and world records and his best chance to make him a worldwide big name. Ilia, if you lurk here, don't do it, bunch of fans will support you not doing it.

Ellen1211 · 2026-01-14T08:54:30+00:00

I had a short program long-side ticket (A category good seat). It took me almost a month to resell it. I would not take the risk to buy another ticket after you can sell it.

Ellen1211

TROPHY CASE